Hollywood loves biopics, possibly because movies come with built in audiences. Biopics also provide a framework for a story on which you can loosely drape facts (a tactic that would most likely get every high school student in America a failing grade.) This week, Steve Jobs opens nationwide. Despite (or due to) its artistic liberties the movie attempts to explain how a man who is a genius, in some ways, can be inept in others. No true story is safe from the biopic genre. Any salacious story or exceptional accomplishment can be fodder for a movie. I’m not sure if Vegas will take bets on whether these movies will be made into biopic, but I like my odds.
Potential Biopic #1: Rosemary Kennedy
Recently, two new books have come onto the market about the “hidden” Kennedy sister. In Rosemary: The Hidden Kennedy Daughter, Rosemary is described as vivacious and having the perfect smile. However, because of a mental illness she was lobotomized. The Kennedys are a fascinating family. A quick Google search will show you that there have been some movies focused on this famous family. This story has Oscar written all over it and I’m going to screen shot this post to tell you “I told you so.”
Potential Biopic #2: Lamar Odom
The Social Network taught us that you don’t have to be too far removed from the subject to depict an event. Lamar Odom’s story is one that is better suited for the big screen than E!. With the past week’s events, Odom’s story has gotten worse and hopefully this will be an opportunity for him to rewrite what could have been a tragic ending to his story.
While these two families stand for very different ideals, I still group them together in my mind. Perhaps it is because they both make questionable outfit choices or that their families are entirely too large, but either way they both have a story to tell.
FUN FACT: Did you know that Merie Brown, the first wife of the sister wives clan, was CATFISHED? I’m not sure how I missed this information, but for that reason alone we need to get Charlize Theron to channel her inner Mormon and win herself an Academy Award.
We might have to wait awhile for the Tom Cruise biopic. I don’t think that the who’s who of Scientology will give this one the green light. But, just think of how amazing it would be. I understand that Going Clear was meant to satiate my appetite for this weird religion, but I want more. To be specific, I want more info on Katie Holmes, Nicole Kidman, couch jumping and how he perfected his flawless running stride.
Potential Biopic #3: Guy Fieri
This one is the wildcard. The complaint with Steve Jobs is that it seems to expose what a jerk Steve Jobs could be. WHAT IF Guy Fieri, behind all the hair gel and bowling shirts, is a maniacal control freak? I have no problems with this deep-fried-cheese-loving goofball, but it does seem like biopic gold.
You’re welcome, Hollywood for doing your homework.