Welcome to the University of Arkansas! Whether you’re here to begin your journey into higher learning or, like this photographer, just here to snap pictures of Michelle from behind a bank of flowers and find out who her new boyfriend is, you’ve come to the right place! At the University of Arkansas it’s all about you and where you’re going.
Please note, when visiting the University of Arkansas, not to fall for the “fake University of Arkansas” currently set up in the neighborhood behind the Arby’s on Ramsey Street. It is merely a convincing tableau only existing to make you look foolish.
On your first day as a freshman Razorback the student move-in team will be happy to help you with anything you’ll need transported from your vehicle to the dorm. Hey guys, raise your hand if a rich punk teenager called you a nerd today! I thought so! They hate you but they’re excellent at not showing it. That’s why they were chosen.
Hands-on classroom experiences are what make the University of Arkansas such an invaluable place to learn. Here we see several students working on a class project for their Introduction to Poetry course.
Should you need any assistance during your time at the University of Arkansas, the UA Student Services Committee will be happy to accommodate you. Especially Sean and Derek, who will be happy to accommodate you into a hot bubble bath with a bottle of Asti Spumanti and some Keith Sweat music.
Cra-zy Glas-ses! *clap clap clapclapclap* Cra-zy Glas-ses! *clap clap clapclapclap* We love to have fun, as you can tell. Hey guys, try not to look so “serious”! (they do not look serious at all!)
At the University of Arkansas you’ll learn in a classroom setting from some of the brightest professors in the nation, like this group of students working together on an assignment for their Hellenistic Period Languages class!
Be sure to immerse yourself in UA’s top-notch arts and cultural programs, free to all full-time students. These programs involve symphony performances, an author lecture series, and plays from the University of Arkansas drama department. Here is a shot from their recent, very popular production of “The Bewildering Karate-Chopping Gentleman from the Deep South.”
Dorm life is strictly monitored for your own safety. Paul will visit your residence halls unannounced and address any grievances against you. Don’t try to fool Paul, he’s very thorough and his punishment will be swift and just.
Comprehensive learning is something we take seriously at the University of Arkansas, as is indicated by the many awards and accolades received by our prestigious College of Chicken Buttholes, regarded among the finest in the region.
The University of Arkansas College of Nursing and Wellness houses some of the most knowledgeable medical students in the country except for Susan, who has lost four patients this week. She’s an idiot and, if we’re being honest, a real liability for this entire program.
Will YOU be one of the many co-eds who falls in love with Professor Gary van Doren this semester? There’s always several. He leaves behind him as many broken hearts as he does reservoirs of knowledge about spore life in the Mesozoic Era. Just try to resist (his charms OR his lecture on rudist bi-valves and foraminifera)!
Brandy, what did you get for number two? Brandy! BRANDY! Hey, Allison. ALLISON! No, over here. OVER HERE! What did you get as an answer for number two? ALLISON! This is the most ineffective study group ever.
The University of Arkansas has a way of bringing people together. Like Stephen and Brad. Can you believe both of their roommates moved to other dorm rooms on just the second week of school? Now these two can live together. It’s so lucky. Friends for life! At the University of Arkansas!
On the day you leave the University of Arkansas you’ll be everything you knew you could be. And you’ll be ready to make your mark on probably the cities of Fort Smith, Bentonville or even Springdale! At the University of Arkansas, the world — or more specifically, the upper southeast area of the state — is yours for the taking! Good luck, new Razorbacks!