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Guaranteed Best Super Bowl Commercial of 2017: Marshawn in Scotland

Marshawn Skittles

There is already a clear winner for best Super Bowl commercial. The footage of Marshawn Lynch literally and figuratively pedaling Skittles in Scotland is already the front-runner.  Throughout the three minute promotion for Skittles, Lynch meets with some of the “real Houston” locals to discuss their love of Skittles and the Super Bowl.  

 

The commercial makes a loose connection between watching football and the need to have a bowl of Skittles near.  I anticipate that the actual prime time commercial will be even better.  Here are a few reasons why….

  1. There are many phrases from the video that we need to pepper into our everyday life.
  • “I ain’t seen no castle before”
  • “Eleven-sixteen? That sounds like what time it is right now”
  • “Them thangs real, bruh.”
  • “I got my good eye on you, boi.”
  • “Ridiculous o’clock?”
  • “Put it together and let it ride.”

     2. Skittles are Nasty, but Lynch is a natural salesman. 

Seeing all that rainbow colored signage makes me want to purchase a bag of Skittles, even though I know they are garbage.  The yellow pieces are laced with Pine Sol and the remnants get stuck in your teeth for weeks.  Marshawn’s love for these rancid M&Ms makes my easily manipulated consumer brain think, “Well, maybe I should give them another shot.”  They’re still gross. They’re still shaped like Leprechaun scat. They’re still not worth eating, but Lynch make me think otherwise.

  1. Marshawn Lynch’s life story is the greatest story ever told.

I am forever thankful for Skittles because they introduced me to the rabbit hole that is Marshawn Lynch’s life story.  There are so many nuggets (or pellets, as you will see) of information that seem too amazing to be true. It might be the greatest story ever told and the only reason I heard about it was because of a non-fruit “fruit” snack.

For Example, when little baby Marshawn Lynch was born he was supposed to have a twin.  They know this because when he was born, another placenta came out.  The midwife looked to Mama Lynch and said “Don’t be surprised if he is as an amazingly strong child.” What happened to the other child? Why is this not addressed?

 But wait! It gets better, according to this article:

 When Marshawn was 12 or 13, we’d go to his games and I’d always have little candies in my purse,” Lynch’s mama explained. “Before the game, I would say, ‘Here Marshawn, come and get you power pellets.

 I just love this story.  Like Betty White in Lake Placid, She is feeding her son, not just feed him but to help him get bigger and destroy other things. 

The whole thing seems made up, but when you watch the commercial it seems totally plausible.  The combination of Marshawn “Beastmode” Lynch and Skittles “kernels of nature’s earwax” is the perfect combination.  We just need to put the two together and let it ride.

Article written by Megan Suttles

I can't decide if I want to use this space to be witty or insightful. I guess it will be neither.

3 Comments for Guaranteed Best Super Bowl Commercial of 2017: Marshawn in Scotland



  1. AuthorDude
    4:23 pm February 1, 2017 Permalink

    That’s funny right there now. I don’t care who you are.



  2. jmeredith42276
    8:25 am February 3, 2017 Permalink

    “Y’all got some real history around this s***.”



  3. JGlass7
    9:08 am February 3, 2017 Permalink

    Definitely will be in the running for the Best Commercial!