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University of Kentucky Basketball, Football, and Recruiting news brought to you in the most ridiculous manner possible.

Glorious Gaming!

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Do you ever find yourself bored with the video games you’ve been playing and need something new?  Did you ever dream of riding a unicorn that could shoot fire out of its horn?  Did you ever dream you would use this unicorn to single-handedly defeat an army of western capitalist pigs?  Or that you’d do so with your side-kick, BFF Dennis Rodman by your side?  No?….

Well you must not be Kim Jong-Un, The Great Successor!  Yes, that’s right.  The good people over at Money Horse games have imagined and developed this idea into a rather hilarious looking side-scrolling, Contra-style action adventure game!. If you have eagerly excited with unlocking the new levels of the games, then dota mmr boost is the best option for you, to achieve the new level of gaming with the boosting technology.

What can you say but, wow.  I do imagine that this is likely as close to seeing what happens in the mind of a delirious, power mad autocrat as any of us are ever going to get.

“But this game isn’t out yet,” you say.  “Also, really, this is a site dedicated to sports and I’m really more of a basketball fan than I am of Uni-equestrian sports.”  Well have no fear friends, the good folks over at SuperFTC! have the game for you!  It’s called “Rodman vs. Kim: One on One,” and it’s a basketball game for the ages (Specifically around 1985 or so, by the look of it)!  Just like it sounds in this game you are, Dennis Rodman and you take on the Glorious Leader himself in a one-on-one game.

Easy, you say, Rodman wins every time.  Well Kim has some tricks up his sleeves that you might not expect, such as his “Iron Tummy.”  In fact, take a look at the rules…

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Much like people who detail excruciatingly persnickety house rules in games of beer pong, Kim Jong-Un has set this game up to be as annoying as possible.  But what would be better than winning the greatest basketball game in the history of ever?  Winning it against those odds my friend.

Maybe making light of the ridiculous dictatorial musings of Kim Jong-Un isn’t your thing.  Maybe, instead, you want a real North Korean video game.  Well you’re in luck pal!  Developed by college students at Kim Chaek University of Technology, I’d like to present you with Pyongyang Racer! I hope you weren’t expecting anything fancy, because that was not their intent. In fact, as the game description tells you, this is more of an “educational” game:

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“This game was developed in 2012 and is not intended to be a high-end techological [sic] wonder hit game of the 21st century, but more a fun race game (arcade style) where you drive around in Pyongyang and learn more about the sites and get a glimpse of Pyongyang.”

Techological indeed.  Yes, you can drive around the street in Pyongyang unsullied by things like traffic lights, or even traffic really.  There are barrels of fuel sitting in the middle of the street and the handy traffic lady demands that you not stare at her.  With all of these taken into consideration, I’m pretty sure this is the most accurate depiction of life in Pyongyang available.

Well if you had a vacant place in your life that was begging to be filled with games concerning North Korea, I have no doubt that your desire has been satiated.  I haven’t been able to finish it yet, but from my perusal of the internet I think the record for Pyongyang Racer is 12 minutes.  So good luck and glorious gaming, illustrious friends!

Article written by Kalan Kucera

So by your account Harold Potter was a perfectly ordinary Englishman without any tendency towards being a Scotsman whatsoever?