2016 seemed to take the Billy Mays approach to insane craziness. Every time you thought you had hit the peak of ridiculousness, pop culture would reply, “but wait! There’s more!” This means that 2016’s Halloween cast of characters will have more weirdos than usual. So, if you need costume inspiration, or if you are trying to guess why that man is dressed up as a gorilla with angel wings, here’s an alphabetical list of pop culture Halloween costumes for you.
A is for “Anything from Star Wars: The Force Awakens”
-An assortment of khaki colored clothing
-The ability to put your hair in a trio of buns
-Maz Kanata’s awesome glasses
-Kylo Ren’s unnecessary three blade light saber
No matter which character you pick, there will be plenty of your “cast members” out on Halloween. There is really unlimited POE-tential for a great costume here.
B is for “Brazilian Ryan Lochte”
-Platinum Blonde hair
-A nice watch, which you suspiciously still have
This news story is in the sweet spot for Halloween costume relevance. It happened a few months ago, so everyone isn’t going to be dressed like the infamous fake robbery, but it is still relevant to 2016. Plus, you get to “Jeah!” all over the place.
C is for “Creepy Murder Clowns”
-One single balloon
-Crusty white face paint
-Squeaky red nose
-An oversized tie
Something about the single balloon makes a clown standing alone on the sidewalk even scarier. I wouldn’t advise anyone dressing up as a clown this year. It’s been a tough year for all the Bozos out there. Best of luck if you plan on this one!
D is for “Dog Filter”
-Dog Ear Headband
-Black Paint for you nose
-Abnormally large tongue
Ladies love the dog filter on snap chat. Why not make it into the most low-stakes Halloween costume ever.
E is for “Election Anything”
-Make America Great Again Hat
-Orange Face Paint
-Overly demonstrative hand gestures
During an election year, this is the go-to costume. The downside is I wouldn’t want to encourage any conversation about the up-coming election. A good alternative would be to go as a “disenchanted voter,” running mascara and all.
F is for “Fixer Upper”
-Leather Strip Earrings
-Freshly Baked Goods
-Mobile Reveal Sign
If Joanna Gaines has reached her tipping point, I don’t want to hear about it. Her effortless charm and consistent branding always makes me smile. There’s not much to this costume, be prepared for people to assume you are wearing Slim Jims on your ears. I suspect that Joanna is better at wearing those leather strip earrings than most.
G is for “Galaxy Note 7”
Everyone loves an interactive costume. Everyone also loves to make fun of people who enjoy a good vape. This costume combines them both. Just draw the outline of a Galaxy Note 7, freehand a few flames and vape to your heart’s content.
H is for “Harambe”
I know we are all tired of the RIP Harambe movement, but this will be his last hurrah. If you would prefer, an alternative H costume could be Hodor, which is somewhat similar. Both characters are nonverbal creatures who died saving a small child’s life.
I is for “Ice T at a Lemonade Stand”
-Varsity Sweater Jacket
As Ice T would say, “What’s with these people? Read the sign.” Clearly you are dressed as Ice T at a lemonade stand. It might be a too specific costume for Halloween, but at least you’ll get to say “delicious” a lot during the evening, just like Ice T.
J is for “James Corden Carpool Karaoke”
-Special Celebirty Guest
-Tunes to belt out
I’ve never watched a carpool karaoke that I didn’t like. I love admiring Adele’s way-too-long nails. I love that Corden drove Michelle Obama around in circles in front of the White House for an hour. It is perfection. This costume allows you to channel all of the fun James Corden has in his Land Rover and sing as loud as you want, for as long as you want. It’s part of your costume after all.
K is for “Kimmy Schmidt”
-Purple Jansport Backpack
-An Unbreakable Spirit
Sadly, this is one of those costumes that are for redheads only. Those Halloween wigs always look tragic on non-gingers. I would also like to advocate for people to dressup as Titus Andromedon, especially as his failed version of The Lion King Musical.
L is for “Lemonade Beyonce”
-Roberto Cavalli Mustard Chiffon Ruffled Dress (or your closest approximation)
-Hot sauce in your bag
No one makes looking jealous or crazy better than Beyonce. All of her iconic outfits from Lemonade would slay on Halloween.
I’ll have the last half of the alphabet next week. If you need me, I’ll be trying to figure out a costume for XYZ.