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10 Real Reasons You Should Be Watching UnReal

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Lifetime’s UnReal is back and the entire Internet is in a competition to see who can praise it more. It’s real cool to like UnReal. The series lifts the curtain to us poor, couch-ridden laymen to reveal what happens behind the scenes on shows like The Bachelor and The Bachelorette. But, here’s the catch, on UnReal, the show is called Everlasting and no one is really wholesome, folksy or likable for that matter. Apparently, they are all jerks like the rest of us. I believe UnReal’s thesis about reality television because one of its co-creators, Sarah Gertrude Shapiro, was a producers on The Bachelor.

In a world where you must binge watch all the previous seasons of a show to get all the ins and outs of the story, UnReal is the outlier. You can jump in at the beginning of season two. Here are ten other reasons why you should join me and all the other UnRealtors. (I’m assuming their fan base has nicknamed themselves that.)

1. It’s like watching The Bachelorette but without all the guilt.

According to this article, the highest calorie restaurant chain item is the Bistro Shrimp Pasta at The Cheesecake Factory. This item has 3,120 calories, which oddly makes me want to try the dish. Now, imagine you can eat those wonderfully and butterfully prepared shrimp without ingesting one calorie! Sounds amazing, right? That’s exactly what watching UnReal is like. You get all of the warm, buttery goodness of reality TV, but with a side of smugness.   You are in on the joke. Reality TV is fake and contrived. Just look at how the producers coax out the storylines from unsuspecting contestants! You are smarter than reality TV. You’re an UnRealtor.

2. TV Series that show behind the scenes are always the best

Everyone loves Sports Night. Everyone loves 30 Rock. Everyone loves Veep. People love these shows because they lift the curtain. They show what goes on behind the scenes in professions that not many people truly understand. UnReal points out that the producers do pick out a girl to be the dumb blonde, the skanky one and all of the other stereotypes.

3.UnReal does what The Bachelor has yet to do

There have been 19 seasons of The Bachelor and, like all the Bond movies, there has yet to be an African American lead. UnReal makes a point to highlight this grievance. Season 2 of UnReal shows why America is more than ready for a new kind of bachelor and at this point, it’s becoming painfully obvious why ABC has delayed having an African American bachelor. I appreciate that Unreal beat them to the punch.

4. You get to see the two faces of reality show celebrities

I have a lot of theories about what reality stars are really like behind the scenes. A lot of the most evil reality star villains are just nasty because production doesn’t feed them for awhile, or they leave them in a room that is a little too hot.   It’s fun to watch this show to help identify some of the tricks that producers use to bring out the witch in all of the contestants.

5. Where else can you find UnLikable chicks who are OK with that?

The tagline for season two is “Welcome to the Fempire.” That’s painful, but it gets to the point. Quinn and Rachel are two ladies who love to wear black, have amazing muscle tone in their arms and are really good at their jobs. There aren’t a lot of shows that show unlikable women, being likable and competent all at the same time. (If that sentence doesn’t make sense to you, you haven’t watched the show yet.)

6. Where else can you find the most evil man on television?

I know Brooks lied about having cancer on RHOC. I am also aware that Ramsey Bolton can go scratch, but no one has ever made me madder than Jeremy on UnReal. I think it is because he is a reasonable dude, that has been hurt and said the worst possible thing to Rachel. When Rachel asks him if he came back to the set because he was worried that she would hurt herself, he unleashes this zinger, “I’m actually okay with you hurting yourself. In fact, I’m fairly certain you will.” That’s some subtle, evil stuff. Which if you know anything about evil people, the more normal and subtle the evil, the scarier it is.

7. You get to see all of the Lifetime Original Movie Previews

These previews are priceless.

8. We are all Madison 

Last season, Madison was the pig-tailed assistant who seemed lost in the shuffle. This season, Madison is the pig-tailed assistant who has to ask all of the tough questions. In the series premiere, she has to ask one of the contestants about the time she was in a wreck that killed her fiancé. It is painful to watch. As the viewer, we all feel like Madison. She is hesitant to ask the tough questions, but in the end, she announces that seeing all the carnage is “awesome.”

9. It’s fun to judge the writing

This isn’t The West Wing. Aaron Sorkin isn’t masterfully crafting the dialogue.   In the promos for next week, Quinn bellows, “Time to blow this turd up!” It’s no, “I am the one who knocks” but it conveys the message.

I mock Quinn’s line, but I also kinda like it. It’s in character. It’s catchy and it’s an “in the moment kind of phrase.”

But, sometimes the writing is not questionable, it’s just plain wonderful. It makes you want to create a tumlr page, just so people can retweet it (or do whatever tumblr does.)

Exhibit A:

Chet: “May the best man win.”

Quinn: “She always does.”

Remind me to use this in real life.

10. You’ve got to watch, just to see what happens next

My goal was to recap the “next time on…” but, there is too much to explain. You are just going to have to see for yourself.

Article written by Megan Suttles

I can't decide if I want to use this space to be witty or insightful. I guess it will be neither.