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University of Kentucky Basketball, Football, and Recruiting news brought to you in the most ridiculous manner possible.

Need-to-Know Wednesday Fields Trash Talk from Future Opponents


Hello, friends. I trust you’re well. Ready for the holidays? I hope that the preferred system of beliefs you have in place is adhered to adequately enough for you to enjoy the season, and that everything is going swimmingly. I hope that your wishes for snow for the morning of the date or dates on which your holiday is celebrated come true, or, if you do not wish for any snow, that no snow falls on that day — and that all of the traditional food you will eat on said holiday is prepared just as it is supposed to be. Truly it is shaping up to be a great thing that you are celebrating!

Not to dwell on the past, but if there’s one thing that Saturday’s game truly taught us (or at least me), it’s that there’s nothing worse than losing to a team who has been taunting you so ridiculously cockily all week and then delivers on it. It’s incredibly maddening. But truly the almighty taunt is enjoying a current heydey like it’s never seen — from message boards which see fan trash-talking starting months in advance to the actual hardwood, where players like Tu Holloway verbally mock the coaches of an opposing team as referees look on quietly and allow the pot to boil over. The power of the put-down seems to be growing. And after Indiana’s extensive jabs over the past two weeks were validated by a last-second win, it seems like other teams on UK’s upcoming schedule have begun to take their own cues from Indiana’s playbook and start ramping up the rivalry before the game is played. Over the weekend I took a look around the internet to find out what some other teams’ fans are saying about their upcoming matchups against Kentucky, and I think you’ll all be somewhat surprised at what I found. Let’s collate them all today in a piece we’ll call Upcoming Schedule Trash Talk and see what shakes out, shall we? Indeed we shall.


Here’s an actual post from a Tennessee fan on John Calipari’s choice of schedule, over at the timeless VolNation forum:

What a disgrace. He is not a Kentucky man and he has no Kentucky pride. He has the best talent in the country and he wants an easy schedule. One thing I always loved about Pearl is that Tennessee did not duck anybody. Tennessee would play anybody, anywhere, anytime.


There’s a fella over at who was happy to see UK misstep:

Cant wait for work tomorrow. im going to lamb-3 goggle so much
my hand is going to fall off !

SHUT UP SuCkS fans ! undefeated-NOT !!!

“You cant spell sUcKs with out tha u-k

The posters of are getting pumped up about Loyola’s holiday break game:

Our coxswains are immensely more talented than UKs…give us a good footchock and our scullers are impossible to bring down. Shoulders, ready, up! I’m assuming we are talking about rowing.

Then there’s this:

I just had to go over to Reitz Arena to drop off a Health assignment and I took a wrong turn. I saw some guys who I assume to be our basketball team practicing on the court. I did not know we had this team, but in the forty seconds or so I stopped to watch, it was clear to me that UK is overrated and ripe for a Loyola upset. Go (what is our mascot? does anyone know?)


Chattanooga is getting in on the action as well, over at the website

We are going to do to UK what we did to Warren Wilson College and Tennessee Wesleyan! Fear the Mocs!

And take a look at this:

If there’s one thing UK is going to discover on Saturday, it’s that Chattanooga is a nightmarish hellscape from which there is no rescue! Wait, that did not come out right. I mean the team, not the city. You can’t spell “hat and cat-goon!” without CHATTANOOGA. Again, that sounded better in my head.


LSU has a bone to pick, but at least they’re being cordial about it:


Georgia fans are creeping us out a little bit over at



According to, Auburn is ready for us and wants to keep things Tiger-centric:

You guys, we need to KEEP BLUE OUT of AUBURN ARENA, unless it is Auburn blue, which is darker than UK blue, and also unless UK fans are paying for tickets, because frankly our basketball team could use the extra funds. Otherwise KEEP THEM OUT!


An Arkansas-Little Rock fan is glad they don’t have to come into Rupp to face us, but thinks that takes our edge away:

Let’s see how big the wildcats are when they’re not on their home court of Rupp! You guys are going down! Trojans forever! Hold on. Why is this game in Louisville, anyway?


But perhaps Louisville still has something up their sleeves:

Ha! We can’t believe you guys fell for the old “play Arkansas-Little Rock at Freedom Hall” trick! See you then, stupids.


Ahhh, the friendly rivalries we find when we go looking. Seems like lots of folk are out gunning for us. I suppose that’s just what we get, however, as we dish it out as well. I don’t think we should stop, do you? Didn’t think so. Happy Wednesday.

Article written by C.M. Tomlin

28 Comments for Need-to-Know Wednesday Fields Trash Talk from Future Opponents

  1. i has confused
    1:15 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    …so confused

  2. GoCats2
    1:18 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    #2 This blogger has been around since Shagari and Orbzut were “dominating” the paint so I am not sure what you mean by “as of late”. Anyway, maybe its becase I have been at work since 2AM but this may not be Tomlin’s best effort.

  3. Adam
    1:19 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    This is hilarious. Don’t know what you guys are complaining about.

  4. Bob
    1:19 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    Tomlin, great as always. Some people have no sense of humor

  5. Pancreas
    1:25 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    Chattanooga is a nice place.

  6. BPsycho
    1:25 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    ” BUT ONLY TWO ARE WELL LIT ” Yeah! let’s be proud of that! yeah!

  7. BPsycho
    1:26 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    #8 For a pancreas! xD

  8. Gaddis Bomb
    1:29 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    I have a sense of humor. Making a statement about the collective effort lately of KSR. It is full of cheap gag posts and criticism of players. What happened to writing a well thought out article. Take for example. These articles are intriguing, and really not all that statistical in nature.

  9. GoCats2
    1:31 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    #11 Dont forget the KSR slogan:

    University of Kentucky Basketball, Football, and Recruiting news brought to you in the most ridiculous manner possible.

  10. RidgeRunner
    1:36 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    Speaking of strange stuff…

    Why would ESPN have this female twitter person from UNC on the college basketball page? I mean…here is Bilas, O’Neal, Katz, etc and then this female who no one has ever heard of from Chapel Hill mixes in with quote, UNC News -unquote? So…..they select 1 school of all that are out there and let her tweet UNC stuff. That’s just weird.

    Even stranger, Other day Sunday) when we & Ohio State got upset the day before…all the national writer are tweeting about these two contests and mixed in is her tweet about…”UNC’s practice report” that comes in. Whatever I suppose but damn thats strange (to me).

  11. Calm&RationalUKFan
    1:36 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    #1: While the intro is subjectively funny based on whether or not you believe there is a “War on Christmas,” this post became empirically funny at “Our coxswains…” and remained funny until the end. I’m surprised you missed that. Although Tomlin’s posts don’t usually require the focus that an SAT reading passage does, please try to pay closer attention when perusing his next one.

  12. macon_volfan
    1:41 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    I like it!

  13. RidgeRunner
    1:41 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    Yes, poking fun at the KSR staff is one thing & sometimes it’s hard to really indicate that is what you are doing in here because well, hell…who really knows?

    But I agree with a few that have mentioned this multiple times…Criticizing the writers is one thing none of us should do. They do this stuff on their time and I for one appreciate it.

    1:43 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    head coach of your Memphis Tigers, John Cali???????? what….rotfl..smh…

  15. Sam
    1:44 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    LSUFan. Unfortunately dueling you would put an end to my career ambitions. Otherwise It would be on…

    Ky Const. Section 228

    All members of the bar, before they enter upon the practice of their profession, shall take the following oath or affirmation: I do solemnly swear… that since the adoption of the present Constitution, I, being a citizen of this State, have not fought a duel with deadly weapons within this State nor out of it, nor have I sent or accepted a challenge to fight a duel with deadly weapons, nor have I acted as second in carrying a challenge, nor aided or assisted any person thus offending, so help me God.

  16. Ryan
    1:46 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    The Loyola one was humorous, but the ones after that weren’t obviously fake enough to be funny.

  17. RidgeRunner
    1:49 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    Brow-Jones…yeah, it was posted in here a few days ago by one of the KSR guys. crazy stuff.

  18. AylortheImpaler
    1:56 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    The haters of this should go sit down with a Jerry Tipton article and have a nice intellectual read.

  19. notcool
    1:58 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    I never comment, but I wanted to show my appreciation for this. Hilarious. The best thing I’ve read on KSR in a while.

    I’m sorry the stupids don’t get you, Tomlin.

  20. ATLCatfan
    2:03 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    Thanks for the humor! Sounds like some readers may need to get a sense of that!

  21. GoCats2
    2:05 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    #20 If you had 2 5’s in one night shouldn’t that count as having a 10?

  22. InternationalPhilosophy
    2:07 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    Went over their heads like a trapeze act.

  23. Scratch
    2:11 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    I love that one of the more creative and intelligent posts written on here is criticized for being a gag, and we are then forwarded to a harvard blog for what a real post should be. Clearly this went over the heads of some of the readers because it didn’t refer to Karen Sypher’s genitalia. I say bravo Mr. Tomlin.

  24. Upper Section Student
    2:22 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    The Auburn one had me rolling!

  25. Me
    2:44 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    Ohhh I get it now. All the negative talk about TJ from ksr over the past several days has just been done in jest. You were just showing how dumb the ‘fans’ sound when we put down our OWN players…

    Well played ksr, I knew there was a method to the maddness.

    Ksr, you’re back on the Christmas card list.

  26. funny
    2:49 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    So does the LSU fan want to slap me in the face with a white glove or some shizznit

  27. kykyle
    3:28 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    LOL! nice

  28. beepthacreep
    3:49 pm December 14, 2011 Permalink

    treat therefans the same at\ rupp