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University of Kentucky Basketball, Football, and Recruiting news brought to you in the most ridiculous manner possible.

KSR Asks: What Scares You Most?

 

Oh, hello, friends. I didn’t see you sneak up behind me there. But I guess this is the season for that kind of thing, isn’t it, being Halloween and all? You certainly gave me a startle. I like your costume; I’ve never seen a “Sexy Eddie Sutton” costume, but you pull it off well, if a little unsettlingly.

Friends, I don’t need to tell you that the season of the witch is nigh upon us as that most spooky of holidays is on our doorstep this weekend. I’ve no doubt you’re all ready for the celebrations: the egging of homes, the toilet-papering of shrubbery, the mess you’ll drunkenly make all over your very low-budget Batman costume. It’s always a fun holiday. That’s why I reached out this past week to some of our favorite personalities to find out what scares them the most. We’ve included some of those responses below in a piece we’ll call What Scares You the Most: Celebrity Edition. And as always I hope you’ll enjoy, be careful this weekend, and have a great Halloween.

——–

Orlando Antigua: “Ever since I was a kid, snakes have always scared me.”

Mitch Barnhart: “I’ve always been afraid of spiders.”

John Wall: “Scary Clowns.”

Joker Phillips: “The red zone.”

Seth Davis: “That Coach K doesn’t like me back.”

Billy Gillispie: “When the lights come up at the bar..”

Kyle Wiltjer, Willie Cauley-Stein and Jarrod Polson: “That we won’t find the pirate treasure in time to save our homes.”

Eli Capilouto: “I find loud noises startling. Also, the carefree happiness of youth and the laughter of young people.”

The Foot Stabber: “That someone will invent stab-proof shoes.”

Tom Crean: “That my wife will figure out my Twitter password.”

Pi Kappa Alpha Fraternity, University of Tennessee: “When a piece of rubber tubing is simply too large to fit into your butt.”

Jim Calhoun: “That those meddling kids will foil my plan to scare everyone away from the abandoned amusement park.”

Bobby Knight: “I’m often frightened by the three ghosts who visit me each Christmas to teach me lessons about my life.”

Kevin Stallings: “Finding out that I’m too late and Arby’s has closed.”

—–

Any you’d like to add? Feel free below. See you next week.

Article written by C.M. Tomlin

All I want is a HI-C and a turkey sandwich. @CM_Tomlin

176 Comments for KSR Asks: What Scares You Most?



  1. I Say
    1:04 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Anthony Davis: “I’m afraid of tweezers.”



  2. MothersMilk
    1:05 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Bob Wiggins: When the waist elastic in my pants break.



  3. Jerry Sandusky
    1:05 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Tattle Tales



  4. Rick Pitino
    1:07 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    STD’s

    People hiding in Porcinin’s

    The 15th second

    More children



  5. lhw
    1:11 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Mitch Barnhart



  6. Mitch Barnhardt
    1:11 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    That people realize I don’t know what the f*&^ I’m doing



  7. Bin Laden
    1:12 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Navy Seals



  8. Jacob Marley
    1:13 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Tomlin, it’s actually four ghosts who visited Scrooge. Classic bar bet trivia.



  9. Florida Rhesus monkey
    1:14 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    barbituates



  10. Double Entendre
    1:14 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Brian Long: “That I won’t appreciate the opportunity I’ve been given.”



  11. The Devil
    1:16 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Father Damien Karras



  12. jarrod
    1:17 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Pitino: Dimly lit Italian restaurants



  13. Digger Phelps
    1:20 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Kentucky Fans



  14. Andrew Wiggins
    1:20 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Getting a text from Tom Crean



  15. Thoroughbred Horse
    1:21 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Fat Jockeys



  16. Uga
    1:22 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    the Gator’s chomp



  17. Obama
    1:23 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Romneisa!!!



  18. Billy Donovan
    1:23 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    All Access Kentucky and Recruiting



  19. BackHomeInKY
    1:24 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Lachlan McLean: I’m always afraid Cal will close his Twitter account, and I won’t be able to endlessly parse his remarks, and I won’t have anything to talk about, and I’ll have to get a real job.



  20. Billy Donovan
    1:24 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    The fact that my barber tapers my hair in the front instead of the back



  21. Turleys_Phone
    1:24 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    The Creek



  22. Billy Clyde
    1:24 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    “That the bars will run out of booze”



  23. Billy D.
    1:25 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Cal on “ALL ACCESS!” – who can complete against that?



  24. Kevin Stallings
    1:25 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Tuesday & Thursday night games



  25. Coach _Cal
    1:26 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    losing a .75 bowl



  26. Billy Clyde
    1:27 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Sobriety & written contracts



  27. Cal
    1:28 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    I hate Big Blue Madness



  28. Matt's Nose Whistle
    1:30 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    breathe right strips



  29. Bruce Pearl
    1:32 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    rain on the day of my backyard BBQ…oh and antiperspirants



  30. Ellen DeGeneres
    1:33 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    The male appendage, 3rd leggage.



  31. Alex Tyus
    1:33 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    My mirror



  32. Bruce Pearl
    1:34 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Aaron and the Family Craft @ my Barbecues.



  33. warrior
    1:35 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Jeronne Maymon: when it is 15 minutes before tipoff and I can’t find my bra



  34. Andrew Wiggins
    1:35 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Buggers.



  35. Rich Brooks
    1:36 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    a stinkin’ ol’ rotten tomato



  36. Ryan Lemond
    1:36 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Saul Smith



  37. Donald Trump
    1:36 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Big Ass Fans, Fierce Winds, & displacment of my beloved Combover.



  38. Jarnell Stokes
    1:38 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    stretchin deez legz



  39. Lance Armstrong
    1:38 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    getting caught/exposed for Doping

    Not being able to market my new rubber bracelet: Cheat Harder



  40. Ricky P
    1:39 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    The overturning of Roe v Wade!



  41. Tim Tebow
    1:40 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Taylor Wyndham



  42. Christian Laettner
    1:40 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    anti-gay communities



  43. Joakim Noah
    1:41 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Another BBN All Access.



  44. Karen Sypher
    1:42 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    babies



  45. FarmersKids
    1:44 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Non payment of Child Support and Home Mortgages…



  46. DerbyDemon
    1:44 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    #11–“Your mother’s in here with us Karras. Would you like to leave her a message? I’ll be sure she gets it.”



  47. Joakim Noah
    1:45 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Dentists. And combs.



  48. J DUB
    1:45 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Joker remaining head coach for another year!



  49. Matt Jones
    1:45 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Practicing law.



  50. Shawn Kemp
    1:46 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Pregnancy Tests.



  51. KSR Website
    1:46 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Website developers and designers.



  52. Brittany Griner
    1:46 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    my big ol’ black penis



  53. Michael Kidd Gilcrist
    1:46 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Scar from the Lion King.



  54. Thamel Toe
    1:47 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    College Athletes behaving properly. I guess I will then have to move to D.C. and chase Congress for stories.



  55. Derrick Rose
    1:48 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    “Standardized tests give me anxiety.”



  56. Louisville Fans
    1:50 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Running out of Crown Royal and Black’n’Milds.



  57. Unborn Babies
    1:52 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Rick Pitino and health insurance.



  58. Bill Self
    1:53 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Running out of time.



  59. Kyle Macy
    1:53 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    A pick in my Christmas sweater.



  60. Brandon Knight
    1:56 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    A 3.9 GPA.



  61. UK Fan
    1:57 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    The thought that Mitch Barnhart might continue as our Athletic Director.



  62. Preston Knowles
    1:57 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Someone using my hairbrush



  63. Alan Cutler
    1:58 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Billy Clyde & mustache trimmers



  64. Terry Meiners
    1:59 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Black Police Men

    Getting caught smoking cannabis



  65. Peyton Siva
    1:59 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Playing in the NBA.



  66. Dr Mantis Taboggin
    1:59 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Rod Strickland behind the wheel of a car.



  67. Billy Donovan
    2:00 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Kentucky All-Access



  68. Richard Pitino
    2:00 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Not knowing who my real mom is.



  69. The Picture of the Hot Girl on the Internet
    2:02 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    “I’m terrified that Drew Franklin is going to post me on KSR.”



  70. Buckets
    2:04 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    What scares you the most?

    Eating at a restaurant, only to find out halfway through the meal that Quick Rick Pitino frequents the place.



  71. Franklin D. Roosevelt
    2:04 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Fear itself.



  72. The Number 6
    2:05 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    I’m afraid of 7. Because Seven ate Nine.



  73. knightynight
    2:11 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    71 – GOLD!!!



  74. Nerlens Noel
    2:13 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Baldness



  75. Porcini's table
    2:14 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    that slimy Italian guy and that skanky blonde.



  76. Ole Roy
    2:18 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Somebody finding out about our fake classes, and I will lose my ring collection.



  77. The Ninja Turtles
    2:22 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Confusing Master Splinter with Coach K.



  78. Kevin Stallings
    2:22 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    The bacon shortage.



  79. Mike Vick
    2:23 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Pit bulls.



  80. Tony Vanetti
    2:23 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Progesterone



  81. The Harrison Twins
    2:24 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Our dad forcing us to wear Under Armor uniforms.



  82. Calipari
    2:24 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Losing. Also, an Orange Leaf closing.



  83. All College Basketball Coaches
    2:25 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Calipari recruiting one of their prospects.



  84. Tony vinetti
    2:25 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Missing my testosterone weekly shot



  85. Any Normal Humaning Being
    2:25 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Gingers.



  86. Linda Taylor
    2:25 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Rick Minter – a nuclear meltdown



  87. Taylor Wyndam
    2:26 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    A razor.



  88. Josh Harrellson
    2:26 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Jean Pants!!!



  89. Honey Badger
    2:26 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Not caring.



  90. Pete Rose
    2:26 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Bart Giamatti



  91. Fan
    2:26 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Mitch Barbhart finding the next UK Football coach…



  92. A Track Suit
    2:28 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Bobby Huggins wearing me.



  93. Calbert Chaney
    2:28 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Bobby Knight’s hands



  94. Jerry Tipton
    2:29 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Not Jerry Tipton



  95. Rob Roy
    2:30 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Alan Cutler



  96. Gary Danielson
    2:30 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Verne Lundquist’s laugh



  97. Matt Jones
    2:30 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Coming to the realization that I do have a whispering nose



  98. Erin Andrews
    2:30 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Peep Holes. And Sex’n Nursing Homes.



  99. Dracula
    2:31 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    2 things Rick Pitino actually loves:

    garlic & mirrors



  100. Tubby Smith
    2:31 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Fast tempo offense
    5 Star Recruits



  101. BTI
    2:32 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Being loved.



  102. Collin Cowherd
    2:32 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    “Making reasonable arguments has always scared me because they look like the color purple.”



  103. Bierman
    2:33 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    shaving my taint



  104. KY Trial Attorneys
    2:33 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    David L. Williams as a judge.



  105. Billie Clyde
    2:34 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Alan Cutler chasing me



  106. Alex Legion's girlfriend
    2:34 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Not Billy G



  107. Lones Seiber
    2:35 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Kicking a football through the uprights



  108. coach robic
    2:35 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Grey hair



  109. Carl
    2:36 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Pat Forde: That someone will discover my closet walls are covered with secret photos of Ashley Judd.



  110. Patrick Patterson
    2:37 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    My boogers not being tasty



  111. Michael Porter
    2:37 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Prison.



  112. J-Rock
    2:38 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Dave Ragone.



  113. Dusty Baker
    2:39 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    The playoffs and the Giants.



  114. UK Assistant Footbal Coaches
    2:39 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Dale Earnhardt, Jr.



  115. Detroit Tigers
    2:40 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    San Francisco Giants



  116. Pat Summit
    2:41 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    I forgot what mine were



  117. All bedrooms everywhere
    2:41 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    B-R-A-S-S-O-W!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



  118. Ellen Calipari
    2:41 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    My secret salad recipe being revealed.



  119. Bill Self
    2:42 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Running out of time…



  120. Dicky V.
    2:42 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Insdie voices.



  121. Dicky V.
    2:43 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    *Inside voices.



  122. J.J. Reddick
    2:43 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    My boogers not being tasty

    – or –

    Botching the “pick and roll”…



  123. The Troof
    2:44 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Indiana loosin all its basetball games an Cody Zella goin down wif a injuree



  124. Pappa John
    2:45 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Impellizerri’s Pizza



  125. concerned parent
    2:45 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Your daughter telling you that her date for the night is SexnNursinHomes



  126. Chuck Norris
    2:45 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    nothing.



  127. Billy Clyde
    2:46 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    That night golfing will be banned.



  128. Jerry Tipton
    2:46 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Plagiarizing NotJerryTipton.



  129. Fear
    2:46 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Chuch Norris.



  130. SexnNursinHomes
    2:47 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    98 & 125- hhahaha

    I’m scared of STD cures.



  131. Ellen Calipari
    2:48 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    That John won’t return my empty Ziploc salad container.



  132. CATSBY90
    2:48 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Digger Phelps: That people will not listen when I say, “Listen To Me!” repeatedly.



  133. The most Interesting Man in the World
    2:49 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Bud Light Platinum



  134. Megan Calipari
    2:50 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    UK fans on facebook.



  135. Christopher Walken
    2:50 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Marsupials do, casue they’re FAST



  136. Charlie strong
    2:50 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    The upcoming release of the new call of duty video game



  137. Father Time
    2:50 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    The Mayan Calendar



  138. Billy Donovan
    2:50 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    That my wife won’t have anymore reasons to bake me a cake.



  139. The Turtle Man
    2:51 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    “I have nightmares about chainsaws.”



  140. Louisville Fan
    2:52 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    That if we don’t win the NCAA championship this year, we’ll never win it again.



  141. Marc Emmert
    2:54 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    That someone will find out about all those payments sent to me by Bill Self, Roy Williams and Coach K.



  142. Newspaper sportswriters
    2:54 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    That if we’re nice to KSR it somehow gives them legitimacy.



  143. Folding chairs everywhere
    2:59 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Bobby Knight



  144. Kentucky football
    3:00 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Winning



  145. Dog
    3:01 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    poop trap for dogs



  146. The Taliban
    3:06 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    dull knives



  147. UL Grad Student
    3:08 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Books with nothing but words in them.



  148. HoneyBadger
    3:09 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Narcs



  149. John Short
    3:10 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    I’m afraid of not being a good American



  150. SexnNursinHome
    3:11 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Penicillin



  151. Big Bird
    3:12 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Romney



  152. Bob Knight
    3:14 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    No Bids on that S*^& I put up for auction.



  153. Birth Control pills
    3:14 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Romney-Ryan



  154. North Carolina athletes
    3:17 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Taking real classes



  155. Boones Butcher Shop
    3:25 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Alex



  156. Ellen Calipari
    3:37 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    People finding out that my famous brownies are really from Kroger.



  157. Lyin' Ryan and Rmoney
    3:41 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    The truth



  158. TrailerTrash
    3:48 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Runnin out o’ weed, mayne



  159. Women Everywhere
    3:50 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    SexnNursinHome



  160. Women Everywhere
    3:51 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    The scary stuff we love to love



  161. Coach Cal
    4:00 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    not returning glad containers to their rightful home.



  162. Fear
    4:20 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Chuck Norris



  163. UL Student with Laser Pointer
    4:21 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink


  164. Porcini's Chef
    4:27 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    My Pitino Special-aged red snapper stuffed with Italian sausage-is not popular



  165. Commonwealth Stadium
    4:31 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    empty seats



  166. U of L fan
    4:33 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    December 29, 2012



  167. Mitch Barnhart.
    5:15 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    I’m scared of committing to the football program. I prefer to dedicate my time and resources to sports that can’t make money. I’ll then say that because of title IX that we have to spend more money on sports that don’t make money, but the fact is that UK has more men’s and women’s sports than any other school in the SEC (And the president is out to lunch!) I cover myself by paying KSR and the IMG UK sports network to run sympathetic, ridiculous commercials about running a “comprehensive sports program.” Hell. KSR takes state money from the Department of Fish and Wildlife (a government agency!) That’s why I haven’t bought a fishing license in years. But it hasn’t been a problem because no one checks. Go Cats!



  168. Jared Swopshire
    6:01 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Demarcus Cousins elbows!



  169. shane battier
    6:25 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    That my brain will finish pushing through the top of my skull.



  170. Thomas Robinson
    1:27 am October 27, 2012 Permalink

    Bowing to the Brow



  171. MKG
    1:28 am October 27, 2012 Permalink

    Farting before a layup again



  172. John Henson
    1:31 am October 27, 2012 Permalink

    Getting dunked on by The Real TJones & getting that flex or Anthony Davis blocking me again!



  173. TheRealTJones
    1:32 am October 27, 2012 Permalink

    Not teaching someone bout Kentucky



  174. King James
    1:34 am October 27, 2012 Permalink

    The 4th quarter



  175. JokerTheChoker
    10:19 am October 27, 2012 Permalink

    $EC Football teams…



  176. MattJones
    10:21 am October 27, 2012 Permalink

    Females…..