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University of Kentucky Basketball, Football, and Recruiting news brought to you in the most ridiculous manner possible.

Tweet Beat: September Power Rankings

As part of the never-ending quest to bring you University of Kentucky news in the most ridiculous manner possible, I comb the Twitter-verse each week for the funniest, oddest, and sometimes, nearly illegible tweets from your favorite players and personalities. Basically, I read Twitter so you don’t have to. Without further ado, here are the best tweets of the week.

We’re going to try something a little different on Tweet Beat this week. We’ve got a new crop of Cats, and what better way to get to know them than through social media? Each month, I’ll rank each of the basketball players by how good they are on Twitter/Instagram/etc. What constitutes “good”? They can be funny, like Perry Stevenson; real like Patrick Patterson; or straight up legendary like Doron Lamb. Who knows, maybe it will inspire the guys to come out of their Twitter shells even more to interact with the Big Blue Nation. Therefore, I present the inaugural Tweet Beat Power Rankings:

lanter-tb

1. TOD LANTER
Twitter and Instagram handle: @tod_lanterIII; tod_lanteriii
Followers: 4,437
Tweet frequency: Multiple times per day
Best recent tweet:

I enjoy the “first world problems” here, as well as the pun that wasn’t intended (so of course it was intended).

Best recent Instagram:

A KSR photobomb is always going to get high marks from this gal.

Twitter style: Tod is a Tweet Beat favorite. Not only is he hilarious, he gives us a behind-the-scenes look at the team, including videos, photos, and inside jokes. Tod’s specialty is what I call “Seinfeld tweets,” or awesome commentary about everyday life, whether it be the weather (“It’s pumpkin patch and apple cider type weather”), food (“What crazy fattening ice cream concoction should I indulge in this evening?”), or really random song lyrics (“And I said what about Breakfast at Tiffany’s? She said ‘I think I remember the film & as I recall I think, we both kind of liked it’…”).

lee-tb

2. MARCUS LEE
Twitter and Instagram handle: @SuperKingMe; 00problems
Followers: 10,513
Tweet frequency: Every hour
Best recent tweet:

It was hard to choose a best recent tweet for Marcus because he is so awesome on Twitter. He is probably the most positive person on social media, besides motivational speakers and Dr. Doron. Every day, he uploads an instagram photo with an inspiration saying like “Don’t tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon.” Seriously. Usually I just roll my eyes when I see stuff like that, but when it comes from a 17-year-old freak basketball athlete with an awesome haircut, it puts a little extra pep in my step. Also, get ready to see beanies:

Best recent Instagram:

More behind-the-scenes videos of the team goofing off, please.

Twitter style: Marcus is already a Tweet Beat star. He radiates positivity, with daily affirmations that make even this cynic smile. I sort of wish I could shrink him, put him in my pocket, and pull him out whenever I’m feeling blue. He’s that great, even if his coaches think he’s a little weird.

willie-tb

3. WILLIE CAULEY-STEIN
Twitter and Instagram handle: @TrillWill15; squishywcs15
Followers: 23,051
Tweet frequency: Multiple times per day
Best recent tweet:

Best recent Instagram:

Is it just me, or is Willie dressing a little less hipstery these days? Where are the suspenders and bow tie? Also, I love Julius Randle, but that shirt is hideous.

Twitter style: Willie lacks a filter on Twitter, which is both good and bad. It’s good because he’ll share pretty much anything about himself (his desire to become the next “Fresh Prince of Bel-Air”), but it’s also bad, because when he’s upset with the fans, he doesn’t hesitate to call them out on Twitter, as we learned several times last season. However, he’s getting better at that, adding the all-important “only about 5% of our fans” disclaimer to keep the pitchforks at bay. I love Willie’s Twitter style because it allows him to express his eccentricities (was it Archie that said “Willie’s kind of a different dude”?). Art, Miley Cyrus, TV shows, video games, fashion. You name it, Willie will give you his opinion on it.

hood-tb

4. JON HOOD
Twitter and Instagram handle: @jonnylightning; hoodyhood4
Followers: 26,921
Tweet frequency: Multiple times per day
Best recent tweet:

Once a country boy, always a country boy.

Best recent Instagram:

Self-deprecating humor? Check.

Twitter style: You knew the guy who brought us #lakehairdontcare was going to be high on the list. As a 5th year senior, Hood has done it all at UK, and has kind of become the old man in the corner telling stories to the kiddos about hunting, volleyball games, fishing, and the good ole days when you could shoot off fireworks. But he’s informative, too. For instance, I always knows the Reds are playing because Jon Hood tweets about them. Reading Hood’s tweets really is like sitting with him on a pontoon boat drinking beer, which is pretty much the point of it all, right?


hawkins-tb

5. DOMINIQUE HAWKINS
Twitter and Instagram handle: @Dhawk_25; dhawk_25
Followers: 14,613
Tweet frequency: Once a day
Best recent tweet:

That’s very true.

Best recent Instagram:

I kind of adore that Hawkins does the double thumbs-up pose. I think we could be best friends.

Twitter style: As a true Kentucky boy, Hawkins has a ton of Tweet Beat potential. He’s an “everday tweeter,” meaning he basically tweets about what he’s doing (“At this UK football game! It’s sooooooo HYPED,” “Kentucky Basketball Alumni game tonight,” “Go to sleep late, wake up tired.. go to sleep early, wake up tired.”), but he keeps it entertaining. In person and online, Hawkins is just a really happy person who’s always smiling and not afraid to be goofy. It’s one of the many reasons he’ll be a fan favorite for years to come.

dakari-tb

6. DAKARI JOHNSON
Twitter and Instagram handle: @dslowmotion22; dslowmotion44
Followers: 25,770
Tweet frequency: A few times per week
Best recent tweet:

I think this is what Dakari was yelling in his profile picture.

Best recent Instagram:

“Ooooooooh kill em” in front of the trophy case? Why not.

Twitter style: Dakari doesn’t tweet that often, but he’s funny when he does. He’s best on Instagram, where he uploads tons of videos of the players doing goofy stuff around the Lodge. This is another favorite:

More, more, we want more!

floreal-fb

7. EJ FLOREAL
Twitter and Instagram handle: @BouncyE_24; bouncye_24
Followers: 2,757
Tweet frequency: About once a day
Best recent tweet:

Best recent Instagram:

Twitter style: So far, so good for UK’s newest walk-on. EJ seems to use Twitter mainly to connect with this friends, but his strongest tweets are the videos and pictures of behind-the-scenes life at the Wildcat Lodge, like the video above.

aaronharrison-tb

8. AARON HARRISON
Twitter and Instagram handle: @AaronICE2; theaaronice_ptp
Followers: 36,558
Tweet frequency: Multiple times per day
Best recent tweet:

That thunder you hear is the women of the BBN stampeding towards the Wildcat Lodge.

Best recent Instagram:

You need to work on that pushup form, Aaron. Pretty backdrop, though.

Twitter style: Like his brother, Aaron keeps it short and sweet on Twitter with a lot of short updates (“Sleep,” “GRIND!”, “College football”). He seems to have a pretty good sense of humor so far (“#BBN…I just feel like tweeting it haha”) and I like his Instagram pictures. Hopefully both brothers will come out of their shells a little bit as the season goes on.

poythress-tb

9. ALEX POYTHRESS
Twitter and Instagram handle: @AlexTheGreat22; alexthegreat22
Followers: 45,275
Tweet frequency: Once every few days
Best recent tweet:

Best recent Instagram:

From this, we learned three things: 1) Alex is better than his friend at fishing; 2) They’re next to a dam; 3) Alex is apparently an Atlanta Braves fan. Successful instagram in my book.

Twitter style: Alex isn’t super active on social media, but lately he’s been tweeting a lot about his new teammates, which I like to see. Over the summer, he pulled a Doron Lamb and took pictures of them all asleep in the van on the way to one of the remote camps. Generally, he just seems to be really, really nice on Twitter, whether it be supporting his friends (“Always good to talk to my bro @A1Laflare10 to check up on him & know he’s doing well !”), or talking about taking his mom out to eat (“Taking my mom to lunch before I head back to lex today !”).

julius-tb

10. JULIUS RANDLE
Twitter and Instagram handle: @J30_RANDLE; juliusrandle30
Followers: 47,530
Tweet frequency: A few times a week
Best recent tweet:

Best recent Instagram:

Julius, Dakari, and Alex Poythress put up this video of them messing around with the Joe B. statue about three months ago, and sadly, we haven’t seen any more since. That is a crying shame.

Twitter style: Julius is what I like to call a “John Wall style” tweeter. He doesn’t tweet that often, and when he does, it’s mainly inspirational quotes about working hard. There’s nothing wrong with that, but I’d like to get to know the other, goofier side of Julius that we’ve seen in the other players’ videos and pictures. Let it out, Julius. We’re all family.

andrewharrison-tb

11. ANDREW HARRISON
Twitter and Instagram handle: @DrewRoc5; drewroc5
Followers: 37,486
Tweet frequency: Once a day
Best recent tweet:

Best recent Instagram:

This picture of Andrew playing video games with Reese Kemp is really sweet and I hope indicates a continuing relationship between Reese and the UK players. Good on ya, boys.

Twitter style: Andrew is kind of quiet on Twitter, mainly using it to talk to his friends and retweet others. I do like his vaguely inspirational tweets about the team (“Can’t really rely on anybody but yourself and your brothers,” “It just makes us more hungry”).

malone-tb

12. SAM MALONE
Twitter and Instagram handle: @SamMaloneuk13; sammaloneuk13
Followers: 14,792
Tweet frequency: Once every few days
Best recent tweet:

This is by far Malone’s best tweet, and it literally made me LOL. I appreciate that even though Wiltjer transferred, Malone still feels close enough to make fun of how big his head is.

Best recent Instagram:

Flyboarding?? Did I accidentally pull up Leonardo DiCaprio’s Instagram or something? Wow. Malone’s family seems to have a fair bit of money, and thankfully, he’s kind enough to share his luxurious escapades with us via Instagram.

Twitter style: If not for his “Rich Kids of Instagram” worthy photos, Malone would be near the bottom of the list because he doesn’t really tweet much, and when he does, it’s just responses to friends or the occasional inspirational quote. But still…flyboarding. Wow.

polson-tb

13. JARROD POLSON
Twitter and Instagram handle: @jpolson05; jpolson05
Followers: 41,685
Tweet frequency: Once every few weeks
Best recent tweet:

(Pickin’s were slim. Jarrod doesn’t tweet a lot.)

Best recent Instagram:

Polson put this video on Instagram on the same day Poythress tweeted pictures of his teammates passed out in the van, but he gets higher marks for it because of the solid three second segment of Jon Hood slack-jawed against the seat and the little finger dance he does at the end.

Twitter style: If Jarrod tweeted more, I have no doubt he’d be higher on the list. He has amazing Tweet Beat potential.

derek-tb

14. DEREK WILLIS, aka “Tommy Callahan Jr.”
Twitter and Instagram handle: @derek_willis33; To our knowledge, Derek doesn’t have an Instagram account
Followers: 9,269
Tweet frequency: A few times a week
Best recent tweet:

Derek is a big KSR fan, and tweeted about Matt’s performance in the Calipari Fantasy Camp pretty often, even calling him out for his illegal screen on the first day.

Best recent Instagram: N/A
Twitter style: Derek doesn’t tweet often, but when he does, you can tell he’s a true KY boy who loves the Cats so much he reads KSR regularly. Because he’s not that active on social media, I was going to give him a pretty low ranking until I saw that this pic of Stone Cold Willow was his cover picture on Twitter: Screen shot 2013-09-26 at 10.55.31 AM

He really is one of us. Well done, Derek. Tweet more, please. Screen shot 2013-09-26 at 1.24.46 PM

15. JAMES YOUNG
Instagram handle: only_1jy
Followers: Instagram only: 6,984
Tweet frequency: N/A
Best recent tweet: N/A
Best recent Instagram:

“Kentucky style, baby!”

Twitter Instagram style: James Young is the only player who doesn’t have a Twitter account, but he does post photos and videos on Instagram. It’s great and all, but come on James…we want you on Twitter! long-tb

16. BRIAN LONG
Twitter and Instagram handle: @BrianLong32; brianlong32
Followers: 9,861
Tweet frequency: Once a week
Best recent tweet:

I like that Long isn’t afraid to call out his teammates on their lack of punctuality. That’s a team player if I’ve ever seen one.

Best recent Instagram:

This is a successful Instagram picture because it tells a story. Brian is at Yankees Stadium and seems really happy and overwhelmed to be there, as shown by his arms up pose. Also, you can tell he’s clearly from New Jersey based on those jeans.

Twitter style: Brian mainly tweets about sports, but he throws in some sarcastic tweets to keep it real, like “I need this week to be over with and it is only Monday.” Same, Brian. Same. He needs to tweet more often to improve his ranking. It’s like you don’t appreciate social media.

Until next time, RT plz?

Article written by Mrs. Tyler Thompson

No, I will not make you a sandwich, but you can follow me on Twitter @MrsTylerKSR or email me.

9 Comments for Tweet Beat: September Power Rankings



  1. Huntin chickens
    9:52 pm September 26, 2013 Permalink

    Why does this have me so GEEKED?



  2. Joe
    10:07 pm September 26, 2013 Permalink

    Good stuff Tyler! I’m dying laughing at julius’ shirt! I ‘ll have to check the archives, but I’m pretty sure I wore that exact shirt in my second grade yearbook picture in 1986. With equally obnoxious original jams.



  3. Mrs. Creeper
    10:21 pm September 26, 2013 Permalink

    That’s what this is, TT. Creeping to the max!



  4. Bleed Blue
    10:46 pm September 26, 2013 Permalink

    Young used to have a Twitter, but deleted it a few weeks before getting on campus. His brother also deleted his. I’m guessing they were getting over run with tweets asking about his eligibility so they just deleted them to focus on ball.



  5. Mr. President, if u had a child would he look like Aaron Alexis?
    10:49 pm September 26, 2013 Permalink

    GO CATS!!



  6. Travis
    10:52 pm September 26, 2013 Permalink

    Great TB, Mrs. TT!



  7. YSR2KSR
    12:25 am September 27, 2013 Permalink

    im i the only one that doesnt see a pun in latners tweet?



  8. DH
    2:25 pm September 27, 2013 Permalink

    YSR2KSR) Maybe.. He is salty (in this case he means annoyed or disgusted) because he forgot his soy sauce which makes food taste, you guessed it, salty…



  9. lisa
    4:36 pm September 27, 2013 Permalink

    Tyler, I love you and everything you guys do. But giving that nutcase Stone Cold Willow any more publicity has got to stop. He is demented and gross. His twitter is a dang train wreck that i cant stop watching but it is still nasty and awful. And full of crap.

    And if I could tell Derek this same thing i would.