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Man suing Kentucky county for refusing to let him marry his laptop computer

Here’s the craziest thing you’ll hear today: according to WDRB’s Jason Riley, Tennessee attorney and music producer Chris Sevier is suing Rowan County Clerk Kim Davis, Governor Matt Bevin and Attorney General Andy Beshear for not allowing him to marry his laptop computer. Sevier went to the Rowan County Clerk’s Office on May 31 to obtain a marriage license — with his laptop listed as “preferred spouse” — but the clerks refused to allow him marry a “gender neutral object.” So, he’s now filed a federal lawsuit, arguing that he should be allowed to marry the laptop, which he uses to create electronic dance music, because same sex couples are also allowed to get married.

This is just the latest lawsuit Sevier has filed on behalf of himself and his laptop, a 2011 MacBook. Over the past six months, he’s filed lawsuits in Texas, Tennessee, and Utah over the same matter, and has plans to file others in a dozen more states. It’s worth noting that Sevier, a Vanderbilt Law School graduate, lost his law license in Tennessee due to a mental illness attributed to his military service in Iraq, also sued Apple for enabling his internet porn addiction and was charged with stalking country music singer John Rich in 2013.

Here’s hoping that man gets the help he so clearly needs.

Article written by Mrs. Tyler Thompson

No, I will not make you a sandwich, but you can follow me on Twitter @MrsTylerKSR or email me.

26 Comments for Man suing Kentucky county for refusing to let him marry his laptop computer

  1. loservilletard
    2:43 pm July 5, 2016 Permalink

    He has as much legal standing as the gays, he should win in our screwed up country.

    • WestCoastCat
      2:57 pm July 5, 2016 Permalink

      Not true. Two consenting adults are free to do as they please with each other. As soon as this computer consents to anything we’ll be on our way. Until then, anyone who makes the statement you just made is a complete idiot.

    • Sentient Third Eye
      3:47 pm July 5, 2016 Permalink

      Setting aside the political aspects, the question of standing is actually a good one because the guy is apparently not even a resident of Kentucky, let alone Rowan County.

    • loservilletard
      9:24 am July 6, 2016 Permalink

      his computer is programed to consent, so now what is your excuse?

  2. Sentient Third Eye
    2:44 pm July 5, 2016 Permalink

    Oh, well. If they kicked all the crazy people off the internet, it would make life boring. Safer, but boring.

  3. Duuuuuude
    3:03 pm July 5, 2016 Permalink

    Sure…..why not. I mean, we have a presidential candidate who the FBI says violated classified procedures, carelessly and recklessly endangered national security – and had done so repeatedly, over 100 times, yet says she would face no charges. I really don’t care any more. If no laws apply to the 1%, then why not let this guy be married to his laptop…… at least give him that.

    • DelrayCat
      3:45 pm July 5, 2016 Permalink

      Yeah…as opposed to the Narcissistic Carnival Barker Blowhard who lies about virtually everything he says, has defrauded people in fake education scams, screwed over and sued the little guy over and over, and has never done anything for anyone but himself in his entire life. Yeah…its a great choice.

    • Sentient Third Eye
      3:51 pm July 5, 2016 Permalink

      So, both of you, why do we insist on nominating the least-qualified, least-honest people in the entire nation? How did we end up with two candidates who average 70% disapproval between them, and hardly anyone thinks either is fit to serve? That’s the very image of a broken system!

    • the ghost of Bill Hicks
      4:43 pm July 5, 2016 Permalink

      Republicans are red,
      Democrats are blue.
      Neither one of them,
      Gives a crap about you.

  4. memphis
    3:05 pm July 5, 2016 Permalink

    After the laptop says “I do” of its own free will, I won’t have any objections.

    • loservilletard
      9:26 am July 6, 2016 Permalink

      any computer can consent and use its own free will if its programmed properly.

    • J-Dub421
      9:58 am July 6, 2016 Permalink

      That isn’t consent of one’s own free will. A computer is an inanimate object. It has no free will and therefore cannot consent. Programming is not consent. You are arguing using a logical fallacy.

    • memphis
      11:15 am July 6, 2016 Permalink

      So, by that logic, if a woman is being told she has to say yes, does that count as consent too? Being programmed to give consent is not giving consent on your own free will.

    • loservilletard
      2:51 pm July 6, 2016 Permalink

      lots of people get married without using their “free will”. But if the computer consents, then there is no reason for them not to get married.

  5. DrSayre
    3:11 pm July 5, 2016 Permalink

    He has as good of a chance of producing offspring with a computer, as two men or two women does.

    • The King
      4:08 pm July 5, 2016 Permalink

      Solely because your logic and thought process amuse me, please explain to me what having the ability to produce offspring have to do with being able to get married? I know plenty of married couples that don’t have children by choice or because of medical reasons,

  6. memphis
    3:18 pm July 5, 2016 Permalink

    If he has an iPhone, is that considered cheating?

  7. Realme
    3:22 pm July 5, 2016 Permalink

    One of the states he’s suing should call his bluff and let him have a licence.

  8. jman3715
    3:32 pm July 5, 2016 Permalink

    I bet he abuses that laptop on a regular basis

  9. Linda Schnitz
    3:37 pm July 5, 2016 Permalink

    can you buy a computer with food stamps?

  10. leon singleton
    4:07 pm July 5, 2016 Permalink

    Yes let him marry his lap top it is no worse then Hillary and Obama supporting pedophiles going into the little girls rest rooms.

    • Sentient Third Eye
      4:28 pm July 5, 2016 Permalink

      This loser probably will want to use the Apple store.

    • UK Big Board Update
      10:34 pm July 5, 2016 Permalink

      Hahaha. You agreed with one of the biggest trolls on the internet. Kudos.

      click the link, and then read his comments on WKYT’s site, and enjoy.

      Don’t say I didn’t warn ya.

      leon singleton April 30, 2016 at 10:13 am | Permalink | Reply
      Like It (0)
      Sooner then later the NCAA is going to nail Cal with violations and Carolina and Duke will pass us with wins. I wish Cal could run a clean program like Duke and Carolina.

      leon singleton May 25, 2016 at 7:50 pm | Permalink
      Like It (0)
      I hope Lee goes to Kansas where he will develop under a good coach.

      eon singleton June 17, 2016 at 1:10 pm | Permalink
      Like It (0)
      Bevin is going to make Louisville the flagship school in he state.

      leon singleton June 14, 2016 at 3:53 pm | Permalink
      Like It (0)
      I wish Calipari would take his snake oil and get out of town.

  11. rdsm224
    7:19 pm July 5, 2016 Permalink

    This guy is sneaky. Really, he just wants to prevent his computer from ever being used as evidence against him in court. Spouse can’t be forced to testify!