**There are lots of big files in this post, so feel free to let it load while you treat yourself to another glass of wine and
Merry Christmas, everyone! A wonderful day of family friendship, and food. Don’t worry, I brought a present: Rob Ford, the GIF that keeps on giving. Toronto’s crackhead mayor is one of the most ridiculous news stories of 2013, and the pictures, GIFs, and videos of him are a comedy goldmine. While going through them the other day, I had a thought: What would Rob Ford think of this Kentucky basketball team? Like a dog with a bone, I couldn’t let go, so I present you with “If Rob Ford watched Kentucky Basketball”:
October 18: Big Blue Madness
Matthew Mitchell is James Brown, Rupp gets a big screen, and the season is finally underway. “HEY-AAAAAYYYYY IT’S A DAKARI IN THE USA!”
October 29: Blue/White Scrimmage
EJ Floreal dunked on Julius Randle during what a lot of us thought at the time would be the most difficult game UK would play this season. Boy were we wrong. (Still giddy though)
November 1: Transy, W 76-42
The Cats overcame a sluggish first half to cruise past Transy. Julius Randle was the only Cat to score in double figures, getting the first of many double-doubles. Just some first game jitters, right? We’ll totally be fine.
November 4: Montevallo W, 95-72
James Young scores an own goal as the Cats get off to another sloppy start to put away Montevallo. So good we’re scoring points for the other team.
November 8: UNC Asheville W, 89-57
Andrew Harrison returns from injury, Julius Randle gets another double-double, and Marcus Lee scores 17.
November 10: Northern Kentucky W, 95-63
Last cupcake before Michigan State. More Julius, Alex Poythress roars, and Andrew Harrison runs the offense with ease.
November 12: Michigan State in Chicago L, 78-74
“WE’RE GOING UNDEFEA—D’oh.”
November 17: Robert Morris W, 87-49
Andrew Harrison hit a circus shot that didn’t count and the Cats avenged a humiliating loss from last season. Back on the horse.
November 19: Texas-Arlington W, 105-76
November 25: Cleveland State W, 68-61
“We were supposed to kill these guys, right? Just destroy them? No? Oh…well.”
November 27: Eastern Michigan W, 81-63
Willie Cauley-Stein shines in a pre-Thanksgiving day tuneup. Feeling better.
December 1: Providence W, 79-65
Willie shines again and Cal gets giddy. Bring on Dallas!
December 6: Baylor in Dallas L, 67-62
We hate Dallas.
December 10: Boise State W, 70-55
A win is a win, but Willie’s hair…
December 14: @ North Carolina L, 82-77
December 21: Belmont W, 93-80
Before Louisville game:
Merry Christmas, friends.