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Great Villains in Kentucky/Florida History

Let’s face it: the Kentucky/Florida football series is as lopsided as game of darts with Stevie Wonder. Kentucky’s 26-game losing streak ain’t pretty, and it certainly isn’t fun to talk about. Yet, if there’s anything Kentucky football fans have learned over the years, it’s finding humor in even the darkest places. Gainesville has given us some pretty great villains in both basketball and football over the years, and while we may be historically inferior on the gridiron, we are professionals in hating. Therefore, here are some great villains in Kentucky/Florida history:

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Joakim Noah

When I sat down to write this list, Noah’s name was the first to fly off my fingers. I had planned to keep this post primarily football, but Noah’s awfulness transcends sport. From the hair, to the goofy facial expressions, to the lame chest pounds, to the annoying fact that he’s actually pretty good at basketball, Noah is the perfect villain. It’s as though Victor Frankenstein created him. Just look at him. How much money did it take to convince that hot lady to hang out with him in the sand?

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Matt Walsh

Ahh, the hair that spawned the Rupp Arena chant to end all Rupp Arena chants. Has anyone drawn the ire of the UK student section more than Matt Walsh? Like Noah, he has that goofy hair, which was only made more ridiculous by that headband he insisted on wearing. It’s like he knew it would make it look even worse. I can’t say “Walsh is ga-ay” is the most creative or P.C. chant the student section came up with, but man, the arena embraced it like a long-lost friend.

Chris Doering

Back in 1993, when the losing streak was only six years old, Kentucky had Florida beat. That is, until Danny Wuerffel found Chris Doering in the end zone for a touchdown with 17 seconds left. That heartbreaking loss, coupled with the Steve Spurrier era, may be what really started Kentucky’s mental block against the Gators. Speaking of…

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Steve Spurrier

Spurrier may coach South Carolina now, but he’ll always be a Gator to me. Spurrier was an All-American at Florida, won the Heisman, and coached the Gators for eleven years, making them into a dominant SEC power. To this day, the Ole Ball Coach especially likes to beat up on Kentucky, and is famous for showing no mercy, running up the score and smirking his little smirk on the sidelines. Kentucky finally snapped the Spurrier streak against South Carolina a few years ago, but the beatings he gave Kentucky over the years (73-7…really, Steve? Really?) will never be forgotten.

That Swaying Thing They Do Before The Fourth Quarter

It’s officially called “We Are the Boys from Old Florida,” but I call it one of the most annoying in-game traditions in the world, right behind “Rocky Top.” You’ve seen it, I’ve seen it, your football-loving grandfather has seen it: Florida fans lock arms and sway back and forth at the end of the third quarter, singing the silly song with puffed out chests and happy tears in their eyes. Considering the fact that every time I’ve seen them do it, they’ve been winning, it just seems mean.

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The Chomp

We get it. It looks like an alligator is chomping its teeth. It also makes you look like you’re not all there in the head. (Except for that time Marshall Henderson did it. That was funny.)

The Legend of Gatorade commercial

Does anyone really care where Gatorade was invented? The Legend of Gatorade commercial, all drenched in Two Bits and orange and blue, just seems excessive. Are you seriously trying to tell me that Florida is good at football because of a sugary sports drink? Child please. Most people only drink it when they’re hungover, anyways. #TeamWaterBoy

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Trey Burton

No one destroyed Kentucky quite like Trey Burton. In 2010, Burton scored six touchdowns against the Cats in one game, breaking Tim Tebow’s school record of five. I’m pretty sure Mychal Bailey still has nightmares about it.

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Tim Tebow

There’s nothing more to really say about Tebow–ESPN has said it all–but there’s no denying that he torched the Cats every year he played them, right up until Taylor Wyndham gave him a concussion his senior year. I like to think that started Taylor Wyndham’s transformation from nice, sweet young man to monster:

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Honorable mention:

Teddy Dupay – Many people called the former Florida point guard “scrappy.” That’s a polite way of saying “annoying as $#!&”.

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Dwayne Schintzius – Just for that mullet

Aaron Hernandez – Hernandez only scored two touchdowns against Kentucky while at Florida, but he killed a man (probably more), so he’s a villain in my book.

Nick Calathes Νίκος Καλάθης – Calathes gave up his Greek pro career and now plays for the Memphis Grizzlies. That may be the one and only time that has happened in that order. Also, he still looks like Butthead.

Brent Pease – That’s for you, Jared Lorenzen.

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Corey Brewer – That picture alone says it all. STOP MAKING STUPID FACES.

Two Bits – I hated that cheer when they did it at Kentucky, and I hate it at Florida. download

Alberta Gator – I’ll admit, this one is pretty random and irrational. I don’t know why I hate Alberta, wife of Albert Gator. She’s done nothing to me. Maybe it’s because they act so lovey dovey during games? Why does Florida have a male and female mascot anyhow? (I’m aware that comment makes me seem slightly sexist.) Come to think of it, I’m not a fan of secondary mascots at all…and yes, that includes Scratch (roast me if you will, but the Cat is FAR superior).

The list could go on and on, but you’d get tired of scrolling. Add yours in the comments section.

Article written by Mrs. Tyler Thompson

No, I will not make you a sandwich, but you can follow me on Twitter @MrsTylerKSR or email me.

24 Comments for Great Villains in Kentucky/Florida History



  1. Wildcatsteeler
    8:31 pm September 24, 2013 Permalink

    It’s Spurrior then Walsh then Noah. I don’t care about the rest. But I hate those 3.



  2. Shawon
    8:31 pm September 24, 2013 Permalink

    I think you could do a separate football “Florida villain” post and save the rest for basketball season. The list is long.



  3. Southern Redneck
    8:39 pm September 24, 2013 Permalink

    Dwayne Schintzius should be a hero for that mullet, not a villain. Just sayin’…



  4. The best line
    8:53 pm September 24, 2013 Permalink

    The best line that Spurrier ever had was when he was asked about what good things he has heard about Kentucky, and his response was “I here Kentucky has a good punter”!!! LOL!!!

    Spurrier classic



  5. Cincy Cayt
    8:59 pm September 24, 2013 Permalink

    Great list. I remember when Noah had his first big game at Rupp. No one knew who he was entering the game, but we all knew when he left. The e-RUPP-tion zone gave it to him throughout…unfortunately he would have many more laughs, including the last one. Those 2006-2007 players were true villains.



  6. UKSupporter76
    9:02 pm September 24, 2013 Permalink

    Schintzius gets my vote (RIP big fella)



  7. Tampa Satchel
    9:24 pm September 24, 2013 Permalink

    Gatorade was not invented at Florida. It was invented by the head trainer at FSU, but he had no interest in making a business out of it, so the head trainer at UF, when he found out the recipe, patented it and slapped the Gatorade name in it.

    http://www.tomahawknation.com/2010/5/26/1488690/why-did-the-fsu-seminoles-let-uf



  8. Boogie15
    9:28 pm September 24, 2013 Permalink

    Ricky Blanton has to be on the list.



  9. SECTalk.com
    9:50 pm September 24, 2013 Permalink

    We’re playing a football game Saturday. Save the basketball guys for basketball season.



  10. Flippy23
    9:50 pm September 24, 2013 Permalink

    One very notable omission……..basketball uber-punk Jason Williams………..



  11. Stoops Troops
    9:57 pm September 24, 2013 Permalink

    Pure gold Mrs. TT. Loved the Walsh reminisce that was the loudest I’ve ever heard the student section chant. You left out the part where all the students had printouts of his naked cover-up girlfriend. The tebow one was hilarious as well that photo sums up all the reactions of Florida fans over reaction, you would have thought their families and villages had been burned infront of them the looks on their faces.



  12. The Wildcat
    10:17 pm September 24, 2013 Permalink

    Without question, your last one hit a nerve with me. From the time scratch (I refuse to give him/her/it personal pronoun billing) started riding a Goddamn bike up and down the football sideline, I was pissed. The fact that scratch was created by some marketing staff member for the kids club (look it up) and somehow received mascot status at all is annoying…but then add to it that scratch was in the Captial One mascot challenge…instead of The Wildcat…sickening. Having more than one mascot is one thing: stupid. I’ll make an exception — Georgia (and others) can have the live mascot and the costume mascot. I’ll let that go. But Tennessee? They’ve got a real dog, a mascot dog and a real (stupid) person with a gun? Come on. Until we retire scratch, however, we’re not much better. #scratchmustgo



  13. Biglaw Dawgin'
    10:36 pm September 24, 2013 Permalink

    Add love bugs to that list. Cats fans living in Florida know what I’m talking about. If you don’t, look it up. Thanks UF.



  14. Blue
    11:43 pm September 24, 2013 Permalink

    I agree on the Scratch nonsense…For one, he doesn’t do anything even remotely useful during games. Two, he looks nothing like a bobcat, which is what he is supposed to be. And three, the Wildcat is gut-busting hilarious. One time while I was a student at UK, the Wildcat walked through a section of blue hairs with an enormous bag of popcorn, pretending to be stepping over people to get to his seat, “accidentally” dumping popcorn all over dozens of people as he made his way. Hysterical.



  15. idontflinch
    2:40 am September 25, 2013 Permalink

    The mullet is the greatest American male hairdo ever. I was brave enough to walk into the chow hall at USMC boot camp at Parris Island, SC with a killer mullet and (unknowingly) subject myself to the “look at the mop on his head” comments from the drill instructors. If I can do that (and totally be willing to do it again) then Schintzius deserves credit for walking into the mecca of college basketball and saying via his mullet f all of ya’ll, All hail Dwayne Schintzius’ mullet!



  16. Hazard Kidd-Katt
    3:40 am September 25, 2013 Permalink

    Scratch is intended to be a more fan friendly mascot toward younger fans and children. Back off Scratch, he’s part of the BBN, he’s doing his job … let’s do ours by lending support or just leave him alone.



  17. Matt from Hodgenville
    5:16 am September 25, 2013 Permalink

    Thank you for finally saying Scratch sucks. He has to go. Nobody wears backwards hats anymore. It’s not cool.



  18. Red Rooster
    8:06 am September 25, 2013 Permalink

    From about 1996-2003 Scratch was more popular and funnier. Hence the Capital One honor. Since 2003 Wildcat has been primary. Mascots are lame to some degree but so was Cat for a while. Getting rid of mascots altogether would be a huge step in right direction.



  19. Honky Kong
    9:46 am September 25, 2013 Permalink

    Scratch is a product of political correctness. He is the ghetto cat.



  20. HaysC.
    10:08 am September 25, 2013 Permalink

    One of the Villains for me is Keiwan Ratliff. In 2002 when he picked off Lorenzen for the Touchdown in the 4th quarter and then that PAT return. I hated him. I truly thought we were going to win that game and he just stomped on those dreams.



  21. Megan
    11:00 am September 25, 2013 Permalink

    Did we never have a female mascot? I think we did, bow in hair and skirt, but I might be mistaken. I do remember the big blue cat on stilts, who lumbered around the arena and occasionally dunked. I liked him. He couldn’t sit down, so he had to rest by leaning up against a wall. Never saw him fall.

    We also had a small kid who dressed up as the opposing team’s mascot (the Ole Miss rebel, for example) and pathetically walked around the floor during timeouts holding a placard on a stick that said “Go Rebs,” or whatever team happened to be visiting. It was kinda funny.

    Did you know UK’s first costumed mascot appeared in 1976? Before that, they were all live wildcats, which died far too quickly in captivity.



  22. austin sutcliffe
    12:52 pm September 25, 2013 Permalink

    Nick Calathes, I hated watching this cartoon character rip apart our defense.



  23. theWilkman
    3:27 pm September 25, 2013 Permalink

    Scratch sucks. In 2005 I was in the eRUPPtion Zone for an early season game and he came through, trampling all over my UK warm-up in the process. I spun him around and said, “What the hell?” while pointing at my jacket, and his response was a shrug. From that moment on I’ve hated that worthless mascot, even though it’s obviously not the same person inside now as it was then.



  24. Biglaw Dawgin'
    4:49 pm September 25, 2013 Permalink

    That swaying thing UF does is probably the gayest thing I’ve ever seen. I went to a game with my UF-graduate boss at the time and he grabbed my hand as well as the other guy’s hand beside me and started swaying back and forth. I quit two days later.