Editor’s Note: The following was written by Harold Leeder, editor-in-chief of The New Circle Circular, Lexington’s #1 source of fake news you can’t count on.
On election day actor and local community member Steve Zahn dressed as a revolutionary soldier and made his rounds in Lexington encouraging people to vote. But now some neighbors are concerned as he’s continued to be sighted wearing his colonial costume.
“I thought maybe it was for like a role he’s working on.” said resident Jessica Talbot. “Like those method actors who completely commit to their characters. Like Daniel Day Lewis or Wesley Snipes.”
Circular staff investigated further by accessing Zahn’s IMDB page which shows an upcoming project listed as Robodog. An animated family comedy about a robotic dog. Not a period drama about the American Revolution. Ben Franklin’s nickname, Robodog, is apparently coincidental.
The actor has caused a few disturbances since the election. He interrupted the Lafayette High School Marching bands practice by limping across the football field playing a fife.
He was seen pouring a can of Arizona Tea into the pond behind Lexington Green.
And at the Kroger off of Tates Creek road demanding a U-Scan tell him if it was still “loyal to the King”.
We met with Local Steve Zahn expert Dr. Leonard Ainsley at his research facility/studio apartment covered in Saving Silverman and Strange Wilderness posters.
“This is an exciting development in the lore of Zahn. Whereas before we would catch glimpses of him doing mundane tasks such as pumping his gas or waiting for a carryout pizza, this is the first time we have been offered a glimpse of his talent in the wild.”
Dr. Ainsley then asked us if we knew Mr. Zahn and could give Mr. Zahn his script for Sahara 2 and 3.
“They would be filmed back to back.”
Will Steve Zahn return to his normal dress and blend back into modern life? Or is this a start of a new trend. A return to colonial fashion. Some seem to embracing the fashion for reasons other than political.
Lee Cruse, who recently had his hair dyed orange and a T shaved into it after failing to pay for his Orange Theory Gym membership, immediately saw the benefit of a powdered wig. As of press time Cruse had gone full gentlemen french dandy and was seen on TV wiping tears from his powdered face with his perfumed handkerchief as the humane society sat a puppy on top of his harpsichord.