Everybody’s favorite summer fill-in hosts, Pardon My Take, had an interesting conversation on a recent podcast about how stir crazy they’ve become without any sports and just how badly they want them back. Big Cat talked about watching the 1992 Duke game this weekend and how it was insane that they didn’t have the score on the screen at all times and he wondered if he’d be willing to give that up to have sports back immediately. It got me thinking about other sports conveniences and perks that we take for granted and if we’d be willing to give them up for some real live, serious sports today. I came up with a list off the top of my head and I’d love to know just how many of these you would agree to:
1. No constant score at the bottom of the screen (h/t Pardon my Take)
2. No Super Bowl Commercials for 5 years
3. March Madness only shown on CBS, network bounces from game to game (no online access either)
4. No College Football Playoff or BCS (back to old bowl system)
5. No Legal Sports Betting in Kentucky for eternity
6. Old School College Basketball Rules (No 3-point line and 45-second shot clock)
7. Televisions Required By Law to be 25-inches or less
8. Students Not Allowed in Lower Bowl of Stadium or Arena Ever
9. SEC Network Eliminated
10. KSR Becomes a Once a Week Radio Show
11. Fantasy Sports Deemed Illegal, Including DraftKings/FanDuel/Etc.
12. Duke Guaranteed One Title Every 5 Years
13. NFL Moves To European Soccer Model, No More Playoffs, Regular Season Champ Only
14. Sports Vary Year to Year But Guarantee UL Beats UK in more sports every year
15. Final Round of The Masters On Tape Delay (which it used to be)
16. Can’t Use The Internet if Someone is Using the Phone at Your House
17. Vince Marrow Leaves
18. John Calipari Retires
19. No Football Tailgaiting for 10 Years
20. Rains at Derby Every Year for 25 Years
Those are some pretty big compromises to things we take for granted. But for me, of the 20, I would be willing to give up 10 of these 20 (#2, 5, 7, 8, 9, 12, 14, 17, 19, and 20). It is becoming clearer and clearer just how much sports is woven into my life. I miss them tremendously and would do a lot of things to have them back right now. Now that March Madness is trashed, I am willing to ride this out to the fall without any meaningful sports. But if football becomes at risk, I might go crazy. Give Duke the title every single year if it means we are back playing sports and in a healthy society come this fall. But just how crazy are you already getting?
Tell us just how many of the 20 you’d agree to right now in the comments section.