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University of Kentucky Basketball, Football, and Recruiting news brought to you in the most ridiculous manner possible.

Blake Bortles’ Friday News and Views

After all of the hype and Johnny Football/Teddy Bridgewater talk earlier in the NFL draft season, the first quarterback to be taken in this year’s NFL draft was Central Florida’s Blake Bortles, who was selected with the 3rd overall pick by the Jacksonville Jaguars. For those hoping that Bortles’ girlfriend (just Google it if you’re a guy, trust me… or scroll down and I’ll help ya out in a second) would land somewhere that would continue to allow her to sport bathing suits, it was a big win. Bortles told the Orlando Sentinel that his first “big purchase” now that he’s officially in the NFL will be to buy the rest of his brother’s tuition at Ole Miss. Not a bad answer, fella. Not a bad answer at all.

The most entertaining part of tonight’s NFL draft though had to be watching the epic meltdown on Twitter of all of the fans who apparently wanted their NFL team to choose Johnny Manziel. I had no idea so many people coveted his services, but people were FREAKING OUT each time a team passed him up. Honestly though Cleveland fans, what did you expect? Kevin Costner cannot be trusted (*Update: Kevin Costner came through. Manziel to the Browns). 

Oh, and as promised… the picture of Blake Bortles’ girlfriend…




And now on the news and views from the day…


The first of 2 potential HUGE Kentucky football Yahtzees came in today… Welcome, Jordan Jones

We have been hearing all week that Kentucky football might make some serious waves this week in recruiting, and so far Stoops and company have not let us down. On the heels of a contract extension and raise, the football staff delivered in the area in which they’ve shined so far in a short amount of time in Lexington. The days of hearing a recruit selected Kentucky over Miami of Ohio, Toledo and Marshall are long gone. Today, Kentucky landed a 4-star/3-star linebacker who picked the Cats over the likes of the more impressive  of the Miamis (Fla), Oklahoma, Nebraska and West Virginia to name a few. Jordan Jones is a stud linebacker from Stoops and Vince Marrow’s stomping grounds of Youngstown, Ohio.

Oh, and also… Mark Stoops beat out his brother Bob for Jordan Jones. Not a bad day at the office.

The good news for the week might not be over yet, as Kentucky looks to be in good position to roll the Yahtzee dice again tomorrow. C.J. Conrad, a 4-star tight end out of LaGrange, Ohio will be making his decision tomorrow between Kentucky and Indiana. Surely, surely, surelyyyy there’s no reason any human being not named the Truth would choose Indiana football for any reason, ever. But we shall see. Conrad also held offers from Arkansas, Illinois, Pittsburgh and Virginia Tech.


The Ohio pipeline comes through again

Vince Marrow and Mark Stoops are capitalizing on their Ohio roots big time in the recruiting process. Youngstown, Ohio in particular, the hometown of both– has provided a great pipeline to Kentucky, as well as some of the surrounding areas. I know, I know…we’ve talked about it a lot… but this staff is absolutely killing it in the state of Ohio– a previously relatively untapped resource.


The non-conference schedule looks solid

Kentucky’s non-conference basketball schedule continues to round into form, and for the Kentucky fans– you have to like what you see. Kentucky will potentially face 4 pre-season Top 15 teams (Louisville, Texas, UNC, Kansas), and one has to think that UCLA could be in the Top 20. Providence will be a good game as well. Even the addition of Eastern Kentucky today, though not quite as sexy as some others– is still a solid game. Eastern Kentucky made the tournament last year. Hey, add them to the list of teams we will play in the non-conference that are probably better than Indiana.

The best news is that Kentucky’s Rupp Arena schedule will be better this season, with an exciting and talented Texas team making the trip to Lexington, as well as North Carolina and Providence.


Only at Kentucky could Jodie Meeks have a graduation press conference

Jodie Meeks’ press conference made up about 1/5 of the news on KSR today. What does that tell you? Well, two things. One– it’s the off-season. And two– only at Kentucky could a player returning to graduate hold a press conference for doing so. In all seriousness though, Jodie Meeks coming back and finishing his degree is a wonderful and impressive accomplishment. In the words of Jay Bilas, it just sucks that Meeks’ graduation is tarnishing Kentucky’s reputation as a basketball school.

P.S. Whoever writes the “Tell All” book on Billy Gillispie from that era…. I’m the first in line to buy 2 copies.


Interest continues between Kentucky and Eron Harris

The news emerged late last night that Kentucky is interested in West Virginia shooting guard Eron Harris, who will be transferring schools. Harris would have to sit out a year, but could provide the shooting touch needed in the 2015 recruiting class after the loss of Luke Kennard to Duke. Harris averaged 17+ points a game for West Virginia. Kentucky doesn’t necessarily appear to be the early frontrunner (Michigan, Michigan State and Purdue were the schools he mentioned for upcoming visits), but Harris admitted that when Kentucky calls, “of course you’d have to be interested.”

Does anyone else just wish he could play this year to watch announcers struggle with the whole Aaron Harris/Eron Harris thing? Bobby Knight would be going shot-clock mode on that one.


The women killed it today on KSR

I’ve rarely enjoyed 2 hours of radio as much as I enjoyed the KSR Ladies Day today. From the Nerlens Noel driving a dump truck story/picture, to Rose’s wisdom on cockfighting and sharing the same last name as a bootlegger, to Rob Bromley’s sex appeal… the ladies killed it today on KSR.



Article written by Ally Tucker

I once successfully requested "The Wobble" to be played 6 times at one wedding.

27 Comments for Blake Bortles’ Friday News and Views

  1. Kevin C.
    11:12 pm May 8, 2014 Permalink

    Still no phone call for Bridgewater ; the only one he gets, might be from the dealership that sold him the Pepto-Bismol Mobile.

  2. Pitino
    11:18 pm May 8, 2014 Permalink

    Is that a nip slip?

    • VinD
      11:56 pm May 8, 2014 Permalink

      If it is, those are the world’s largest, most disproportionate areolas. I’m guessing Blake Hair Don’t Care.

  3. Typo City
    11:25 pm May 8, 2014 Permalink

    “Type as fast as possible. Click submit as fast as possible. Go to Qdoba.”

  4. Airplane
    11:37 pm May 8, 2014 Permalink

    Don’t call me Shirley

  5. Buckets' Mom
    11:42 pm May 8, 2014 Permalink

    My son has too much time on his hands. He posts on here WAY too much.

    • Buckets' mom's mom
      12:34 am May 9, 2014 Permalink

      My grandson’s two or three posts per week pale in comparison to the incessant trolling and moniker changing of my daughter, who has nothing better to do than post 8-year-old comments about Cal made by Matt Jones that no one cares about.

      I’m sorry my daughter is so pathetic. I have failed her as it’s obvious she has failed at life and has nothing better to do.

    • Buckets
      12:40 am May 9, 2014 Permalink

      Mom, grandma — there is something I have to tell the two of you. My sexual preference is for other men. I love truck-stops, raves, and Glee. I hope you all will come to accept me and my lifestyle choices with time.

    • Buckets
      12:44 am May 9, 2014 Permalink

      Actually I prefer Blake Bortles’ girlfriend. Nice try, though, pud.

    • Buckets
      1:04 am May 9, 2014 Permalink

      Just kidding. Lindsey Duke does nothing for me — voluptuous breasts are just gross.

      I actually like fishsticks more than Kanye West.

  6. CardFan502
    11:46 pm May 8, 2014 Permalink

    cal www and they runners fix this nfl draft . its a well none fact

  7. Wow
    11:46 pm May 8, 2014 Permalink

    Can’t believe the Cards had 3 first rounders. Crazy.

    • LouLou
      11:53 pm May 8, 2014 Permalink

      Well, we are a football school.

    • Clint Hurtt
      12:13 am May 9, 2014 Permalink

      This is the greatest night in UL history.

    • BigtimeCatFan
      12:16 am May 9, 2014 Permalink

      I don’t blame ya. I’d say my school is a football school if we got dominated in basketball, too.

    • LouLou
      12:23 am May 9, 2014 Permalink

      Yeah, basketball is just for kicks. Oh we like to win a basketball championship every so often because its fun and something to do, but football is where it’s at nationwide.

    • Slapdicks
      12:24 am May 9, 2014 Permalink

      I’d say my schools a basketball school of we got dominated in football…

    • Why are UL fans so obsessed with "dicks"?
      7:10 am May 9, 2014 Permalink

      27 years between titles? I wouldn’t call that “often”, but to each his own. Also, I didn’t get the memo that Kentucky became a football state. You know, like Indiana, North Carolina, etc. – football states. Lol.

      How much do you all hate Blake Bortles now?

  8. Shanislavski
    11:47 pm May 8, 2014 Permalink

    Who’s Aaron Harris?

  9. inside info
    11:53 pm May 8, 2014 Permalink

    Ally, you are my new favorite blogger after seeing the canoe pic. Thank you.

  10. Chaz
    11:57 pm May 8, 2014 Permalink

    This whole draft was crazy. Glad TB went in the first round though. Better invest in a winter wardrobe before you start buying cars.

    • The Cards can go to Hell.
      12:42 am May 9, 2014 Permalink

      Bridgewater included — we’ll never hear the end of them about getting 3 1st round draft picks now. Stoops will earn major respect in my eyes if he beats the tards at the end of this year.

    • Isn't that kind of pointless?
      1:06 am May 9, 2014 Permalink

      I mean, Bridgewater is gone now — what he does won’t affect BBN. While I won’t root for the kid, I’m not going to waste my time rooting against him, particularly after the BS sports media savaged the Hell out of him over the past month.

  11. Bortles
    1:54 am May 9, 2014 Permalink

    Even better than that pic…her nude pics leaked.

  12. The Brow
    6:56 am May 9, 2014 Permalink

    We are supposed to be big brother. It is embarrassing that the tards have there first rounders. Hopefully, we get four or five drafted before it is all said and done.

    • ¢lint Hurtt
      7:12 am May 9, 2014 Permalink

      Thi$ i$ the greate$t moment in UL hi$tory.

  13. clancyhat
    3:25 pm May 9, 2014 Permalink

    Any chance that Luke will change his mind ??