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A Big Blue Christmas Wish List

UK Athletics

Dear Santa,

I know it’s a little late-notice, but with your magic I’m sure you can pull off a last-minute Christmas Miracle.

You might want to put put me on the Naughty List, but I can admit my many faults.  I didn’t know how to setup the KSR Podcast, and even after I learned how to setup the equipment I couldn’t start a podcast without a terrible intro.  I cursed referees.  I turned in homework assignments late.  I haven’t given my dog a bath in at least three months.  I recreated a UofL recruiting visit.  My posts have had more grammar errors than “Breaking Cardinal Rules.”  Even worse, I spent my summer working on a UofL radio show.

I know it’s hard to forgive me, but if you show me a little love I know I can turn things around.  Here’s what I had in mind.

1.  I wish Skal would learn how to play physical.  

I have faith in the Haitian Sensation, but the thin-framed, inexperienced center needs to figure things out defensively sooner, rather than later.  Camp Cal should do the trick, but a little help from you would go a long way.

2.  I wish for Drew Barker to exceed expectations.  

After the Cats pulled the plug on Patrick Towles, the team didn’t dramatically improve.  Drew has all of the physical qualities, but I worry that he cannot handle the heavy burden of expectations set by the Big Blue Nation.  If he could be as good, or even better, the football team will be the best we’ve seen in a long time.

3.  I wish for more songs from Kentucky Joe.

This one isn’t for me, it’s for Marcus Lee.

4.  I wish Jared Lorenzen and I could agree on something.  

After an entire season of KSR Football Podcasts, pumpkin cheesecake and Linkin’ Park were the only two things we didn’t disagree on.  Maybe if Freddie Maggard starts sitting in between us, we could be less confrontational.  No offense to Freddie, I have more trust in Santa.

5.  I wish I could forget about Wisconsin.

The low-point in my college career, my Big Blue fandom, and arguably my life.  It’s been months, but I don’t think that awful feeling will ever cease to haunt me.

6.  I wish I could forget about the loss to Florida, and Auburn, and Vandy and UofL.  

Just one of those games could’ve sent the Cats bowling.  Just one.  They could’ve won each game if they traded a few bonehead plays for a few great ones.  The worst part — I don’t know which loss was the worst.

7.  I wish the UK logo wasn’t so stupid.  

We’ve beaten this dead horse all day, but it can’t be beat enough.  I could’ve shown them what the letter “K” looks like and made $80,000. Maybe you have a better design, Santa?

8.  I wish Jamal Murray could find his shot.  

UK Athletics

UK Athletics

His stats aren’t bad  — 39% from the field and 33.3% from 3-point land — but he’s been inconsistent after a hot start to the season.  If he can hit a streak when March rolls around, the Cats will be tough to beat.

9.  I wish that Rick Pitino will never beat Kentucky ever again. 

But why should I even bother asking?  It’s already a certainty.

10.  I wish for a Bowl Win after the 2016 season. 

If you only grant one wish, let it be this one.  Please.  I beg of you.  I hate making New Year’s Eve plans that don’t revolve around football and I hope that 2016 can finally be the year for Kentucky football.

I know it may sound like I’m asking for a lot, but I hope you can understand.  It’s been a heart-breaking 2015 and this guy could certainly use a little Christmas Magic in 2016.

What are your Big Blue Christmas wishes?

Article written by Nick Roush

"Look upon the doughnut, and not upon the hole." @RoushKSR

6 Comments for A Big Blue Christmas Wish List

  1. evilcarl
    10:16 pm December 16, 2015 Permalink

    The fact you admit Jared Lorenzen nevers agree with you, and I emphasize never, means you should never cover football. And you claim that as your strong sport. You have weakened this site. Horrible posts that make no sense, your lying on the live blogs, and the incompetence and 6 minute stories about nothing in the football podcast prove you don’t belong. Thanks for your service and quit. Because you don’t know football and you sure’s hell don’t know basketball. When you bring down the Afternoon Underdogs with your appearance you barely add anything to society. Quit.

  2. ColoradoCat3
    10:54 pm December 16, 2015 Permalink

    Auburn loss was the worst. Sent us in a complete tail-spin. Win that and you’re looking at 7 or 8 win season

  3. justaguyinthebackrow
    12:10 am December 17, 2015 Permalink

    I hope Kentucky beats Louisville in every game they ever play, but with how the teams are playing now, I’m not sure this is the year to be making bold claims like Pitino never beating the Cats again.

    • UK Big Board Update
      12:29 am December 17, 2015 Permalink

      Even if so, its well known that Cal owns Rick’s Cards.

      I guess Card fans can make little replica Bo Ryan/Wisconsin shirts (I’m the One in 38-1). Maybe make it say something like “I’m the Two in 7-2″… 😉

  4. Le Docteur
    7:20 am December 17, 2015 Permalink

    I wish KSR had a different football guru than Jared Lorenzen. Or change the name of this blog to “Here’s What Jared Lorenzen Thinks About Kentucky Football.”

    • UK Big Board Update
      10:56 am December 17, 2015 Permalink

      He knows WAY more than any commenter on here does. That should go without saying, of course…