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Musburger Running Late To Final Game Because He’s “On A Heater” At Red Mile

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Editor’s Note: The following was written by Harold Leeder, editor-in-chief of The New Circle Circular, Lexington’s #1 source of fake news you can’t count on.

Legendary announcer Brent Musburger will be calling play-by-play for one last time tonight at Rupp Arena, or at least he will be “whenever this hot hand goes cold” he said as he pulled the lever on an instant racing machine.
Musburger’s broadcasting career has spanned nearly 50 years and those eyes have witnessed some of the most dramatic moments in sports, “but one thing I’ve never seen, is someone taking this machine for all she’s got.”
The move to retirement comes at an odd time for Musburger who has been tasked by ESPN with calling SEC basketball games this year, as the announcement came with over a month left in the SEC basketball schedule. “People that think it’s weird that I’m suddenly stepping away midseason obviously didn’t check the over/under on the number of games I’d call this year. Let’s just say me calling this game tonight means more to some than others,” he said before audibly adding, “wink.”

Musburger himself first reported to ESPN that he was running a little behind due to car trouble.  However it appears that he forgot to hang up the phone, as one producer Greg Wayne overheard the broadcaster asking people in the background, “what kinda action ya’ll got here besides those Ben Hur chariot races,” and “what do you wanna bet that track out there ain’t even a mile?” and he was able to put two and two together.

“Look you can’t rush these things, I’ll get there when I get there. After all it’s my night, no one’s gonna leave without giving me a good ‘atta boy’, OH, I just won again.” Sources close to the sportscaster say tonight means a lot to Musburger but it doesn’t mean as much as the high of the win, and the smell of that sweet, sweet cash.

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Article written by Harold Leeder

1 Comment for Musburger Running Late To Final Game Because He’s “On A Heater” At Red Mile



  1. runningunnin.454
    7:03 pm January 31, 2017 Permalink

    Actually, Musburger is not retiring….he has a gig with sirius-xm radio; the subject, what else….sports betting analysis.