Auburn’s sensational collapse in Gainesville last night was as mystifying as it was predictable. Truly bad teams can find a way to lose an intrasquad scrimmage, let alone in that bee-hive against the nation’s top team. So even though we all saw it coming I don’t think anyone was prepared for the two brand new, never-before-seen methods to meltdown that Auburn unveiled to the world.
First, the intentional foul with under 20 seconds left in a tie game. About as bone-headed and unaware as it gets, but considering Florida was more than likely going to go down and either hit a shot or get fouled as time expired (or win by 15 in OT), you could almost shrug it off as a certain brand of savvy…Auburn was 10-19 from 3 to that point, and if you watch even a lick of college basketball these days then you know no matter the score, the team with the last shot will always jack a desperation three. It’s Basketball Science. (Chapel-Hill’s renowned Smith School of Basketball Science is currently accepting applications, if you’re interested in learning more).
So you’re down two with plenty of time to dribble around aimlessly and jack up an off-balanced heave. Out of timeouts of course, but that certainly doesn’t matter when your coach is on the bench looking all bewildered like he just got dumped by Topanga. Just throw the ball in to one of the guar—wait, there are no guards–and that’s the genius of it. It’s innovation, baby. Backs against the wall, against all odds, and pulling a loss out of your ass just in the nick of time. All too familiar, no?
Sorry. Unnecessary, I know, but don’t act like you weren’t thinking the same thing, my BBN neighbor.
It’s an apt comparison but does offer hope. Remember this?
Consider this case, closed.