Absolute Anarchy. That’s where the SEC finds itself after eight nonsensical weeks of play. The East is especially uncivilized, with at least 2 conference losses plaguing each team, leaving the race for Atlanta more muddled than when the season began. Not only is the SEC insanely balanced, these games have been insanely good. We’re nearing the homestrech of the season, and nobody has a clue who’s going BCSing. It’s honestly too much to think about at the moment, which is why I’m on with the slant…
Kentucky (Florida L 45-37)—Kentucky’s offense is not as good as advertised, it’s better. Remember that they’ve hung 43 and 37 on LSU and Florida without one of the best running backs in UK history, and a sub 100% Keenan Burton. There’s not a defense outside of last year’s Bears that can keep the Cats from the endzone. Kentucky simply needed to make one or two plays on defense or special teams to overcome the University of Tebow, but unlike the LSU game, they could not. T’would be nice to get Little back for the homestretch.
Next Game: Miss St 10/27
Florida—Honestly, if there’s a way to corral Tim Tebow, it hasn’t been published yet. In terms of pure passing, Tebow still has some room for improvement, but he’s usually throwing to open receivers. Linebackers and safeties simply have to respect the run, and that little fake-draw-into-pass is quite a devastating play. It looks like Tebow will be ready to go for the Jo-Ja game, despite a banged up
fender shoulder. As long as he’s on the field they’re as good as any team in the country, even with a suspect D.
Next Game: Georgia 10/27
LSU (Auburn W 30-24)—For all of his accomplishments, sometimes you have to wonder if Les Miles realizes football games come attached with implication. Nevertheless, his X-Box-esque style paid off once again in the most exciting game of the weekend, as 90,000+ LaSoo fans tempered their booze-fuled calamity with sheer horror when Matt Flynn launched the winning TD with but a second to spare. An LSU loss would’ve been devestating not only for purple n’ gold, but for the SEC as well, as the nation’s premier conference might’ve seen their National Championship hopes drown in a swell of parity.
Next Game: @Alabama 11/3
Tennessee (@Alabama L 41-17)—Ouch. Not only did the Vols get ‘blowed-out’ by their bitter rival, but they made Tide QB John Parker Wilson look like Joe Namath (without the panty hose and ruptured capilaries) in the process. Erik Ainge continues to perform, but the Volunteer defense has looked like, well, like a bunch of volunteers. Add a whole couch to that fire raging under Fulmer’s La-Z-Boy.
Next Game: South Carolina 10/27
South Carolina (Vanderbilt L 17-6)—When was the last time a Spurrier coached ball club failed to find the endzone? We all knew the Gamecock offense was putrid, and this game wreaked of “trap”, but a top 10 team has to be able to score a TD–at home–against Vandy. How many other teams in the league would lose to Vandy at home? Maybe two. Not to take anything away from the Dores, they are a solid squad expertly coached by Steve Martin twin Bobby Johnson, but a huge step back for a team that could’ve/should’ve leaped forward. Now the game in Knoxville becomes a must…but it’s Spurrier vs. Fulmer, we all know how that usually ends up.
Next Game: @Tennessee 10/27
Arkansas (@Ole Miss W 44-8)—‘Scuse me Arkansas, but are those forwarded passes being completed? QB Casey Dick, who was recently cut by the Sig Ep B-Team, tossed 3 TD’s as the Hogs destroyed the Rebels, and likely Meat Orgeron’s chances of returning to Oxford next season.
Next Game: FIU 10/27
West Virginia 38 Miss St 13
SEC Pa’er Rankings:
1. LSU—likely the last hope for an SEC National Champ
2. Tebow—never has an act been so reliant on one man since Jesse and the Rippers rocked the Smash Club
3. Kentucky—they nicked up Tebow, something no other entity has been able to do. Bonus points.
4. South Carolina—back to the drawing (clip)board
5. Auburn—Certainly the best 3 loss team in the nation…as if that’s any consolation
6. Alabama—not as good as UT wants them to be
7. Tennessee—It’s not that they’re lazy, it’s just that they don’t care…and they’re lazy.
8. Georgia—cocktail par-tay awaits
9. Vanderbilt—bowl hopes re-emerge
10. Miss St—maybe don’t play West Virginia next season, Sly
11. Arkansas—statement game by the Hogs was more like a non-statement game from the Rebs
25. Ole Miss—nice call on firing Cutcliffe
Obligatory Notre Dame cut-down: