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Jared Carter is a mountain

ambassador carter
the mountain, transporting humanitarian aide

In old English society, a carter literally was “one who transports goods.”

Fitting, is what that is.

We’ve watched Jared transport said goods for 4, maybe 7 seasons, and now the time has come for this wheelbarrow of un-guardable freight to be exported back to the Land of Giants. There, he will be taught how to carry his “basketball” goods over into “life” goods, get a job with Frank Shoop, develop a deep, booming laugh, and receive a complimentary “Yes I’m 7 ft. and no I will not change your light bulb for you” t-shirt. It’s all part of the plan, just like his name.

Jared’s taken his share of slander over the years. We’ve often chronicled his career as an O’Charley’s soloist, perma-fart face with the durability of a goldfish, and even logged his African excursion. His career stats might read “bust”, but all this kid’s been bustin’ is skulls in practice and nut, all up over your woman. See, he has a uniform, you, we, do not. He has his place already etched into the annals of Jon Scott’s website. You, nor we, do not. He knows what its like to tell Roy Williams “thanks, but I’m just not that into you.” You, nor we, do not.

Mt. Carter.That’s the nickname I eagerly anticipated upon the signing of this local leviathan. Has a nice, rather cocky ring to it, don’t you think? Thoughts of Jared swatting Joakim Noah into the 5th row, smiling and wagging his finger as if to say, “don’t hike Mount Carter unless you can get to the top.” Alas, Mt. Carter was never to be, as injuries and man’s unquenchable thirst for coal took their toll.

Is there a chance JC is injured running through the hoop Wednesday night? Of course, but this kid will literally run through a paper lined curtain for this university, and that, that says more than any double-double ever could. So long Jared. Mount Carter. It will be really awkward if he have to do this again next year, so please keep that in mind.

Article written by John Dubya

The Twitter: @Johnawilk