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The weed in Alabama linebacker’s car belonged to an imaginary friend, not him

Alabama linebacker Tim Williams picked up a gun charge early Thursday morning but avoided any drug-related charges, despite having a bag of marijuana in the console of his car.

According to the arrest report, the weed belonged to a friend named “Brandon Chicken” — or at least that’s what Williams and the man in the driver’s seat of Williams’ car told police. Williams and the man were simply holding the weed for “Chicken,” they said.

If that is indeed true and Chicken is indeed a real person, he must be pretty upset he was thrown under the bus by his friends. He also must be pretty upset the officers smelled burning marijuana coming from inside Williams’ Chevy Impala, which suggests his friends were smoking his stash in the Publix parking lot.

Nick Saban has yet to issue a suspension for his star linebacker for the Kentucky game, because, why would Alabama ever suspend a player over gun charges and holding pot for an imaginary friend?

Article written by Drew Franklin

I can recite every line from Forrest Gump, blindfolded. Follow me on Twitter: @DrewFranklinKSR

16 Comments for The weed in Alabama linebacker’s car belonged to an imaginary friend, not him



  1. Sentient Third Eye
    12:19 pm September 30, 2016 Permalink

    It’s okay, because I’m sure his imaginary friend only has it for imaginary medical purposes.



    • Juan4UK
      2:02 pm September 30, 2016 Permalink

      Cannabis is actually effective in protecting the brain in cases of TBI. Every football player should be smoking pot. #fact



    • Sentient Third Eye
      3:18 pm September 30, 2016 Permalink

      What issue of JAMA did they publish that in?



  2. Ben27
    12:38 pm September 30, 2016 Permalink

    It makes little difference! you could suspend half the team and we would still lose the game. It only show the true character of Nick Saban.



  3. symphonist41169
    12:51 pm September 30, 2016 Permalink

    Breaking News!! Brandon Chicken is related to the girlfriend of former Notre Dame linebacker Manti Te’o…



    • ClutchCargo
      2:50 pm September 30, 2016 Permalink

      I wonder if Brandon Chicken is any relation to Ron Mexico. Maybe a distant cousin?



    • Sentient Third Eye
      3:19 pm September 30, 2016 Permalink

      You just have to understand Tuscaloosa. Down there Chickens are as common as Smiths are up here.



    • Luether
      7:20 pm September 30, 2016 Permalink

      Good one!



  4. CatsfaninFL
    12:58 pm September 30, 2016 Permalink

    My wife is a UF Alum… when I told her we lost a bunch of DL this off season as one of the reasons our D wasn’t doing so well she said, “Doesn’t Stoops know he’s in the SEC? Gotta sweep that stuff under the rug and keep them on the team”. Unfortunately I’m not sure she’s wrong…



    • ClutchCargo
      1:50 pm September 30, 2016 Permalink

      I want to disagree with this, but I got nothin’. I see the conversation going like this…

      Saban: “We have anybody else who can tackle Williams and Snell?”
      linebacker coach: “Yeah, we’re good.”
      Saban: Welp, 1 game suspension it is. We have to at least make it look good.”



    • RealCatsFan
      3:01 pm September 30, 2016 Permalink

      On the flip side, I can’t recall if Stoops suspended the kid who wrecked his car while driving drunk (was lucky to live through it), and looks like there will be little if any repercussions for Derek Willis after he was arrested this past summer for PI. Stuff happens. Sometimes the coaches come down hard on a kid, sometimes they let them slide. It has a lot to do with their value on the field / court, fair or not.



  5. runningunnin.454
    3:00 pm September 30, 2016 Permalink

    “Friends” just can’t stay out of trouble.



  6. NewPoster
    3:06 pm September 30, 2016 Permalink

    To be fair, I think Williams avoided drug charges because Dunaway – who was in the car alone when the ofc smelled weed – said the weed was his (and imaginary friend’s also, but not Williams’).

    I’m all for a suspension since it helps KY, but the fact that the kid smokes pot while in college and owns a gun while in Alabama seem like pretty stupid things to punish him for in the grand scheme of things.



  7. sincitycat
    3:14 pm September 30, 2016 Permalink

    I always thought someone’s imaginary friend was God.



  8. snarkster
    3:37 pm September 30, 2016 Permalink

    Why did the Chicken cross the Road? To avoid being thrown under the bus.



  9. blueballs80
    7:52 pm September 30, 2016 Permalink

    Roll tide…literally!!