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The Scrapped Ideas For Commonwealth’s Grand Opening

ky-joe-stage

On Saturday, September 5th, Kentucky football will open its 2015 season in a brand new Commonwealth Stadium. UK announced several festivities for its grand opening of the New CWS, headlined by a Sundy Best pregame concert, with Matthew Mitchell and the Go Big Blue Band as its opening act.

Other special guests include: a choir made up of singers from all 120 Kentucky counties, performing the national anthem; game ball delivery by The Golden Knights, the United States Army Parachute Team; and Stone Cold Willow in the front of the new student section.

But before the event details were released earlier this week, there were months and months of planning the big day. Several ideas were tossed around over the summer, many of which were scrapped for various, undisclosed reasons. Tonight, I will share with you some of those ideas that didn’t come to fruition. I was there for the meetings, and I’m heartbroken these didn’t make the cut.

*****

Kentucky Joe concert

Before Sundy Best and Matthew Mitchell got on board, the idea of giving Kentucky Joe a stage and a microphone to showcase his talents was discussed. He’s going to sing in the parking lot regardless, so why not seclude him to one area, where he can’t annoy everyone.

Blow up the 2012 Vandy game ball

Without question, the lowest moment since I’ve been attending UK football games, Kentucky lost to Vanderbilt 40-0 in 2012, Joker Phillips’ last season. There weren’t more than 5,000 fans in the stands in the second half to watch the seniors’ final SEC game in Lexington. It was UK’s first scoreless game at Commonwealth Stadium since 1993, and Vanderbilt’s first SEC shutout since 1968.

If Cubs fans can blow up the Bartman ball, Kentucky fans can strap a couple sticks of dynamite to that game ball and watch ‘er explode.

Parking lot Yahtzee with Vince Marrow

parking-yahtzee

Free Rupp Arena ice cream

I know we like to keep a separation of football and basketball, but Rupp Arena ice cream is the best ice cream ever. UK should move it to Commonwealth Stadium. Free cone for every fan in the season opener.

More of this…

Doesn’t matter when or where, just more of it.

Fans help build the stadium

Hopefully, the stadium is done on time. Hopefully. But if not, give everyone a can of paint or a hammer or a nail gun and make them earn that ticket. Together, 60,000 people can get it done.

Rich Brooks delivers game ball on a motorcycle.

With all due respect to the Golden Knights, who I jumped with on my birthday a couple years ago, I’d much rather see the game ball enter the stadium in Rich Brooks’ arms as he rides his Harley through the new tunnel in the east end zone.

Anything with Brooks on a Harley will suffice.

Stadium-wide neuralyzer

mib

You know that memory-eraser from the Men In Black movies? It’d be nice to blast the entire stadium with one of those prior to kickoff. Create a fresh start for Kentucky football. 0-0 all-time record going into the UL-Lafayette game.

But that technology doesn’t exist, apparently. That’s too bad.

Unveil the new Stevie Got Loose statue stevie-got-loose-statue

 

Any other suggestions?

Article written by Drew Franklin

I can recite every line from Forrest Gump, blindfolded. Follow me on Twitter: @DrewFranklinKSR

8 Comments for The Scrapped Ideas For Commonwealth’s Grand Opening



  1. C.M.Tomlin
    8:41 pm August 6, 2015 Permalink

    Pure satire. Can’t touch mine, but good enough to amuse the Twitter rubes



  2. Que-Cat
    9:03 pm August 6, 2015 Permalink

    What ever it is it NEEDS to send chills to other team spin for now on. It needs to be hated by all other fanbasees, it needs to ROCK the whole stadium and all downtown Lexinton. Stoops and crew is making it right, UK is backing with this new awesome new stadium….. Let’s as FANS and supporters make a chant that ROCKS all collage ball……



  3. Somervillain
    11:06 pm August 6, 2015 Permalink

    It’s “Stadium-wide neuralyzer inator”.



  4. Michael
    1:52 am August 7, 2015 Permalink

    Add the Ring of honor back in some way!



  5. Gazza
    7:44 am August 7, 2015 Permalink

    I’m sorry. I don’t think the chalk flavored water “so called ice cream” should even be brought back to Rupp Arena. Even if you give it away and they charge you $5 for it?



    • Troll Slayer
      11:50 am August 7, 2015 Permalink

      Obvious troll is trolling.



  6. jaws2
    1:46 pm August 7, 2015 Permalink

    Seriously, stone cold willow? Boy, THATS exciting!



    • jaws2
      3:49 pm August 7, 2015 Permalink

      He’s been a little bit of a problem since coming here. I’m not a bit surprised by this.