Happy Saturday, Big Blue Nation. Saturdays in the summer tend to feature less sports news than normal. Throw in a pandemic and you’ll be hard-pressed to find a ton of news anywhere. That’s why KSR is providing some food for thought by playing another fun game of, “Would You Rather?”
Would You Rather…
1. See a Kentucky National Championship in 2021 or watch Duke and Coach K get taken down for cheating to get Zion?
NICK: National Championships are rare, just not as rare as watching the downfall of a program you hate most. A title is for one season. Asking the question, “Did Coach K cheat throughout his entire career?” will tarnish a legacy forever.
TYLER: This is tough, but National Championship. As much as Duke, Coach K, and the program’s saintly reputation annoy me, Kentucky has only brought home eight national championships, three in my lifetime. I’m still kicking myself for not being in New Orleans when the Cats won No. 8, so if the opportunity comes around again, I will be on the sideline ready to make confetti angels.
DREW: National championship is the easy answer here. They’re hard to come by and you’re telling me we can grab a free one next year? Easy answer. However, easy answers are lame so give me the burning of the Duke program and the media’s Lord and Savior Mike Kryskeakwdkzi. For years we heard about how John Calipari is ruining the purity of the sport of college basketball by signing one-and-dones, then Coach K does it and he’s innovative and changing with the times? Get outta here. He’s no saint and if that can come to light, I’ll put some popcorn in the microwave and watch it implode. Besides, this hypothetical ‘would you rather’ doesn’t say it has to be one or the other, so give me cheating Duke getting caught and maybe the Cats will just go ahead and win the title anyway. The ol’ two-for-one.
JACK: Poking fun at Louisville for their string of scandals and misfortune has been entertaining, and that’d certainly continue (if not be magnified) with Coach K and Zion. That being said, the joy of winning a national championship is second-to-none, and I’m itching to get that back in 2021. With a stacked roster, now is the perfect opportunity to capitalize on it and bring home No. 9.
2. Swim in a lake infested with alligators or an ocean with sharks?
NICK: Neither of these frighten me as much as a snake in a lake. There’s something about the way they slither through the water that terrifies me. When I’m on land, at least I know I can get away from it if need be. That’s not the case underwater. With all that being said, give me Gators. You never really hear about “gator attacks” unless their medulla oblongata starts acting up.
TYLER: Neither?? Alligators don’t fare well in the colder waters of the lakes up here, but I’d be lying if I said that picture of the one in Kentucky Lake last week didn’t send a chill down my spine. I’ll go with alligators for the simple reason that I don’t want to be paranoid about jumping into the lake this summer.
DREW: Neither of these really bother me, but the alligator found in the lake in Western Kentucky last weekend is a little more unnerving because you don’t assume the risk of death by alligator when you jump in a lake. When you’re in the ocean you at least know there is a tiny chance of a shark appearance, so your guard is up a little even if in the back of your mind. So I guess give me ocean with sharks because a million billion people swim in the ocean and never have a problem. Water’s a little clearer too and I can hopefully outrun the small kids and old people through the shallow water to the beach. (Just kidding. Kind of.)
JACK: Picking either option kind of sucks, but I guess the lesser of two evils is swimming with sharks. Like Drew said, I’m always a little more cautious in the ocean and the crystal blue water makes it easier to see any potential danger. At the lake, my focus is on making sure there’s always a cold beer in my hand on the boat and in the water. And according to my five-second Google search, alligators are more dangerous to swim with than sharks given their tendency to eat and attack larger creatures, so sharks for the win. Boom, science.
3. Win at Tennessee or at Auburn?
NICK: I hate Tennessee with the fire of a thousand suns. I’d rather spend a day in Starkville than fight through a mob of Rocky Top to get to the abomination referred to as Neyland Stadium. Handing the Vols a loss would be oh-so satisfying, but for timing’s sake you gotta pick Auburn. If UK can upset Florida in week two, the game on The Plains could be a top 25 matchup between two 5-0 teams. A win over Auburn would tell the world these Wildcats are for real and pave the way for an 8-0 UK team to walk into Neyland Stadium. (Also, if you’ve scanned Tennessee’s schedule they will likely have three losses by the time UK comes to town.
TYLER: Tennessee for sure. I’ve seen the Cats play — and lose — there once in person and it was more than enough. In fact, Kentucky’s only won at Neyland once in my lifetime (I was four months old, so my memory’s a little hazy). For all the progress the Cats have made under Mark Stoops, there’s something about the Vols they just can’t shake, so winning in Knoxville would not only send a statement about Kentucky’s place in the SEC, it would exorcise some demons.
DREW: Tennessee. We’re going to Atlanta. Can’t be dropping games in the East.
JACK: We’re going with a clean sweep with Tennessee here. I’m all for winning high-profile games in the SEC, and even more so when they come on the road, but we’ve got to beat the Volunteers in Knoxville this year. No ifs, ands, or buts.
4. Attend Keeneland’s Summer Meet or the September Kentucky Derby?
NICK: I know I’ll be in the minority on this, but I’d take a muddy day in the infield at Churchill Downs over an afternoon in a gussied-up Keeneland paddock ten times out of ten. The Derby crowd is my kind of crowd. The three-day party is my favorite time of the year and I’m keeping my fingers crossed I’ll still be able to attend this fall.
TYLER: Keeneland Summer Meet. Both will be hot (Keeneland’s meet will take place in July), but by September, I’ve usually given up on outdoor activities in lieu of the AC. Being in a big crowd at Churchill when it’s 100 degrees out sounds miserable.
DREW: Keeneland, Keeneland, Keeneland, Keeneland, Keeneland. If I lived in Louisville I might go Derby here, but it always costs me a fortune to get back to Lexington from Derby (don’t drink and drive, friends) and with Keeneland I can roll it over into the night and go on home to bed whenever. Plus Keeneland is one of the most beautiful places on Earth and Churchill Downs is not one of the most beautiful places in Louisville.
JACK: Due to timing alone, I’m going with Keeneland for Summer Meet. I need live sports, and I need it now. Being able to bet in person and with a drink in my hand and the ponies galloping in front of me sounds like heaven right about now. And to break protocol a bit, if we’re allowed to attend Summer Meet at Keeneland, we should also be able to attend the Kentucky Derby in September, so I’ll go with that.
5. The NBA is returning to Disney World later this summer. Would you rather spend a day at Magic Kingdom or Universal Studios?
NICK: The amusement park capital of the world was created by Disney World. Even so, Universal takes thrill to higher heights than Disney. Along with a few excellent coasters, Harry Potter World is incredible. In fact, I visited it recently twice in a three-year span. I love it, but recency bias makes me want to revisit Magic Kingdom, a place I have not been to since I was knee high and wide-eyed.
TYLER: Harry Potter World at Universal. I’ve never been and I’m dying to have a butterbeer. My husband is a huge Star Wars fan and has been itching to check out Disney’s new Galaxy Edge park, so this sounds like a perfect opportunity to part ways and enjoy a geeky solo adventure.
Fun fact: I actually performed at Disney World as a kid with the Danville Children’s Choir. Best to go out on top, right?
DREW: I don’t even know what’s at Universal Studios. I remember commercials for it all the time when I was watching Nickelodeon as a kid and it seemed awesome but right now I couldn’t tell you the first thing about it. They still got like a Jaws exhibit? That’s all that comes to mind. Give me Magic Kingdom so I can ride all of the hits.
JACK: Universal Studios wins this in a landslide. Disney is slowly adding new attractions to Magic Kingdom and the rest of its parks, but until we see the finished product of it all, you can’t beat the Hulk coaster, Harry Potter World, and all the other rides at Universal.