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Christmas Presents for a Perfect December 26

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A Jump Shot for Tylis Ulis

Nobody plays more minutes than Ulis (34.8 per game) but nobody in the rotation has a worse field goal percentage (34%).  Luckily, Tyler doesn’t need to shoot the ball well to be effective, but if he can hit a few jump shots, it can really take the pressure off of his teammates.

Underhand Free Throws

I don’t want Onauku to be there too often, because that means UK’s bigs are in foul trouble, but I could watch him do this all day.

A Brand New Poster

We’ve had some good ones from this game over the years.  Unfortunately, no matter how nice Santa is to the Wildcats, I don’t think anything can ever top this one.

A Stain for Rick Pitino’s Suit

TSN

TSN

And a Harry’s Razor, Promo Code Jones.

Muscles for Skal Labissiere

Muscle Milk, creatine, none of it will work overnight.  We need Santa to bring Skal some Popeye sleeves so he can throw bows like he’s playing against Jared Swopshire.

Haircuts for the Louisville Basketball Team

UofL Athletics

UofL Athletics

They have team strippers but they can’t have a team barber?  Somebody please give these guys some help.

Just for Men for Coach Cal

When Cal started (top) vs. the grey we see today.

When Cal started (top) vs. the grey we see today.

There all comes a day when wee have to admit that we need help.  Coach Cal’s job has grey’d him away like he’s POTUS.  Even if it’s just “A Touch of Grey,” today’s the day Coach Cal could use a little touch up on that marvelous head of hair.

Bompy

I don’t know what in the hell a Bompy is, but I want to see more Bompy.  He’s a creepy trainwreck you just can’t take your eyes off.  Besides, who wouldn’t want to see Bompy and Dancin’ Guy go toe-to-toe?

Dollar Bills From Andre McGee

Sorry, I wanted to make a joke about hookers but it’s Christmas.  ‘Tis the season to spread joy to the world.  OK, so maybe it is an appropriate time to make a hookers’ joke.

A New Couch for Charlie Murphy

This has nothing to do with anything, I just really love this GIF.

No Excuses

A game that typically involves more insanity than structure, this could very well be the last time Pitino faces Calipari.  I don’t want a Golden Age of the rivalry to go out with Louisville fans making excuses.  They already have Mangok’s injury, I don’t want to give them anymore BS to lean on.  Besides, scrappy games aren’t bad in the NCAA Tournament when you’re simply trying to stay alive, but this game deserves more than that, especially when it’s a game Kentucky never loses.

Article written by Nick Roush

"Look upon the doughnut, and not upon the hole." @RoushKSR

4 Comments for Christmas Presents for a Perfect December 26



  1. KevininLoveland
    8:12 pm December 25, 2015 Permalink

    Fail. Trying too hard. You’ve got to let it flow naturally.



  2. rockatao
    7:01 am December 26, 2015 Permalink

    Tylis?



    • CATandMONKEY
      8:21 am December 26, 2015 Permalink

      Tyis Uler, the best UK floor general and favorite player of a KSR show caller. (Tylis Ulis above)
      After the caller said Tylis three or four times, it became embedded in my lexicon -now it is actually difficult to correctly say “Tyler Ulis.”

      The UK team that played Duke can beat Louisville today. Rupp should be in rare form. If the Cats that played in Pauley Pavillion show up today, it will be a long year at the workplace but not Armageddon.



    • CATandMONKEY
      8:23 am December 26, 2015 Permalink

      Tylis