A Jump Shot for Tylis Ulis
Nobody plays more minutes than Ulis (34.8 per game) but nobody in the rotation has a worse field goal percentage (34%). Luckily, Tyler doesn’t need to shoot the ball well to be effective, but if he can hit a few jump shots, it can really take the pressure off of his teammates.
Underhand Free Throws
I don’t want Onauku to be there too often, because that means UK’s bigs are in foul trouble, but I could watch him do this all day.
A Brand New Poster
We’ve had some good ones from this game over the years. Unfortunately, no matter how nice Santa is to the Wildcats, I don’t think anything can ever top this one.
A Stain for Rick Pitino’s Suit
And a Harry’s Razor, Promo Code Jones.
Muscles for Skal Labissiere
Muscle Milk, creatine, none of it will work overnight. We need Santa to bring Skal some Popeye sleeves so he can throw bows like he’s playing against Jared Swopshire.
Haircuts for the Louisville Basketball Team
They have team strippers but they can’t have a team barber? Somebody please give these guys some help.
Just for Men for Coach Cal
There all comes a day when wee have to admit that we need help. Coach Cal’s job has grey’d him away like he’s POTUS. Even if it’s just “A Touch of Grey,” today’s the day Coach Cal could use a little touch up on that marvelous head of hair.
I don’t know what in the hell a Bompy is, but I want to see more Bompy. He’s a creepy trainwreck you just can’t take your eyes off. Besides, who wouldn’t want to see Bompy and Dancin’ Guy go toe-to-toe?
Bompy at his best while in Puerto Rico pic.twitter.com/JITghcoXtg
– Lou Sports Network (@CardsRadio) December 23, 2015
Dollar Bills From Andre McGee
Sorry, I wanted to make a joke about hookers but it’s Christmas. ‘Tis the season to spread joy to the world. OK, so maybe it is an appropriate time to make a hookers’ joke.
A New Couch for Charlie Murphy
This has nothing to do with anything, I just really love this GIF.
A game that typically involves more insanity than structure, this could very well be the last time Pitino faces Calipari. I don’t want a Golden Age of the rivalry to go out with Louisville fans making excuses. They already have Mangok’s injury, I don’t want to give them anymore BS to lean on. Besides, scrappy games aren’t bad in the NCAA Tournament when you’re simply trying to stay alive, but this game deserves more than that, especially when it’s a game Kentucky never loses.