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University of Kentucky Basketball, Football, and Recruiting news brought to you in the most ridiculous manner possible.


January 6, 2016

2015: Were The Seers Correct?

Matt Shorr 10:00am January 6, 2016 1/6/16 Comments Disabled

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Just as every year begins with confident prognostication, so it ends with surprises, disappointments, and the easily foreseen. 2015 was no different. However, some of the ancient Greek soothsayers used their gifts to predict major happenings last year, and now is the time to see how accurate were their visions. “The Queen, the Duke, the…

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December 16, 2015

Ahead of Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Here Is Some Star Wars Trivia You Should Know

Matt Shorr 9:50am December 16, 2015 12/16/15

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To reduce holiday stress and stuff accumulation, my wife and I haven’t gotten each other Christmas gifts for 15 years. We haven’t even asked each other about trading gifts in that time. Not this year. I hinted in August that the only thing I have wanted for Christmas in my adult life is tickets to…

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December 2, 2015

Funkhouser’s 2015 Guide to Christmas Gifts

Matt Shorr 9:46am December 2, 2015 12/2/15 Comments Disabled

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Hello there, Funkhouseroos! With Thanksgiving behind us, we can finally focus on Christmas without getting upset at the “early” decorations and 90-Blah Point Blah’s All-Christmas Music All The Time, right? Now you can hear “Wonderful Christmastime,” Paul McCartney’s second-worst song, 2-5 times a day instead of never! According to many studies, the feeling that we…

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October 21, 2015

The Newest Trailer for Star Wars: The Force Awakens, Is Just…

Matt Shorr 9:57am October 21, 2015 10/21/15 Comments Disabled

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You all, I’m really sorry to do this. I know that you’ve already been inundated with Star Wars trailers and scoops and news and bloops and parodies and ads for video game tie-ins and such. There will be dozens more, and media saturation as we get closer to the December premiere will be intolerable, but…

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October 7, 2015

Four New Transformers Movies. Just What the Doctor Ordered?

Matt Shorr 10:01am October 7, 2015 10/7/15 Comments Disabled

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You read Funkhouser, which means you are a man/woman of discriminating tastes, accustomed to the finer things in cinema. If I asked you, “what would you most like to see out of Hollywood in the next few years?” Would you say, “another Transformers movie”? I doubt that .5% would. Even then, I doubt that that…

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August 5, 2015

The Movies of 2015: How Is the Year Shaping Up?

Matt Shorr 10:40am August 5, 2015 8/5/15 Comments Disabled

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We’re seven months into 2015, which gives us a decent idea how this year will go for the box office. Now that summer is in full swing, most blockbusters have come and gone, but we still have a few late-year big name movies waiting. That said, how is 2015 doing so far? Compared to 2014,…

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July 22, 2015

A Mid-Summer Night’s Trailers

Matt Shorr 10:01am July 22, 2015 7/22/15 Comments Disabled

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Summer’s here, y’all. Lexington is a hot, soupy mess. I can’t remember having this much rain, ever, and I’ve lived in this area since 1982. Nasty sweltering weather is good for movies. Any structure I can enter and stop sweating is worth the money. Most of the marquee movies have come out already (Mad Max:…

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July 2, 2015

Stewart Huff: The Life of a Road Comic

Matt Shorr 10:30am July 2, 2015 7/2/15 Comments Disabled

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There’s a circle in Stewart Huff’s yard where the grass doesn’t grow anymore. When he’s working on a new show, he goes out at night and walks in a circle for hours, talking out loud to himself, chewing over a joke to get it just right. He’s admits this sounds crazy. But don’t you have…

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June 17, 2015

Spoilers: What’s Your Worst?

Matt Shorr 9:07am June 17, 2015 6/17/15 Comments Disabled

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  Something BIG happened on Game of Thrones Sunday night. You know how I know? No, I haven’t watched it yet, because I don’t get HBO. I’ll have to wait a week or two to watch it at a friend’s house. I know because a Facebook friend of mine put up a post surrounded by…

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January 25, 2015

So Coach Krzyzewski Just Won His 1000th Game. Congratulations?

Matt Shorr 9:19pm January 25, 2015 1/25/15 Comments Disabled

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So Coach Mike Kρるيزสรбski won his 1000th game tonight.  Pbbbbth.  Come back when you’re not coaching Duke. Stand-up comic Ross Duncliffe has a little something to say about Coach K, and why we call him Coach K.  (Video just a hint NFSW due to one dirty word.) OK, congrats or something.  Duke still sucks.

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