Tweet Beat: The Lake Beard is officially weird

As part of the never-ending quest to bring you University of Kentucky news in the most ridiculous manner possible, I comb the Twitter-verse each week for the funniest, oddest, and sometimes, nearly illegible tweets from your favorite players and personalities. Basically, I read Twitter so you don’t have to. Without further ado, here are the best tweets of the week.

Good evening, KSR readers. Oh, you’re stuck at a company Christmas party? Good thing I saved all of these tweets for you. Sneak into a dark corner and scroll, baby, scroll.

Tod Lanter says what we are all thinking when we see Jon Hood these days:

#lakebeardisweird

It’s finals week at UK, which means Brian Long and Kyle Wiltjer probably aren’t the only students who look like this right now:

With that smile, I’m surprised MKG didn’t get a toothbrush endorsement sooner:

Thank you #Reach for helping me clean my pearly whites with the Reach Total Care, Whitening brush wit CaCO(3) Micrawhitening technology!

— Mike Kidd-Gilchrist (@MikeGillie14) December 12, 2012

CAN WE MAKE THIS REALITY SHOW HAPPEN, PLEASE

Summer School wit @antdavis23 y’all should make this a reality show this summer lol..Have no idea what I’m going to major in

— Mike Kidd-Gilchrist (@MikeGillie14) December 7, 2012

Best UK holiday picture ever?

Chilling with Blue Santa at Kentucky Proud b4 da UK/Portland Game twitter.com/aepps25/status…

— Anthony Epps (@aepps25) December 8, 2012

Cal went to Charlotte to watch two of his “sons,” MKG and Eric Bledsoe, square off Wednesday night. And just when I thought I was over the picture Cal posted of the three, MKG had to go and tweet this:

Great seeing @ukcoachcalipari on the sideline tonight.. Brings back old memories #BBN #Bleedblue

— Mike Kidd-Gilchrist (@MikeGillie14) December 13, 2012

More, Eloy? Oh, stop it! #verklempt

A coach isn’t just a person who teaches you basketball, they also teach you life lessons. @ukcoachcalipari @ukcoacho

— Eloy Vargas (@E_Vargas30) December 13, 2012

Leave it to Sam Malone to break out the fist pumping reference:

When Brady starts fist pumping you know its a wrap

— Sam Malone (@SamMaloneuk13) December 11, 2012

So…did Derek Anderson write a book? Or did he just make his own inspirational poster?

STAMINA: God gave us Breath so don’t hold it in & Die. Use it to Glorify him or he will take it ALL away from you. twitter.com/DerekLAnderson…

— Derek L. Anderson(@DerekLAnderson) December 13, 2012

(It’s a book. But the idea of that being a poster amuses me. Maybe Ryan Harrow can hang it in his dorm room.)

Guys, if any of you look like Tom Hardy or Chris Hemsworth and have a crush on Keyla Snowden, you’re in luck…

Okay my new white male actor crush: Tom Hardy aka “Bane” . He’s a cutie . “Thor” is still my FAV tho 💚

— keYLa(@KeylaSnowden) December 13, 2012

But, don’t be a:

CREEP . CREEPY . CREEPER .

— keYLa(@KeylaSnowden) December 11, 2012

DeMarcus Cousins has one last thing to say about that incident between him and OJ Mayo earlier this week:

Of course the media was going to hype that situation they need what ever ” negative story ” they can get on me ,but no it wasn’t intentional

— demarcus cousins(@boogiecousins) December 12, 2012

But I’ll take this one on the chin as well …🚶🎯

— demarcus cousins(@boogiecousins) December 12, 2012

Mark Krebs visited Josh Hopkins on the “Cougar Town” set…odds he left copies of his head shot in random places around the set?

What a day on set of Cougar Town thanks to @mrjoshhopkins!! #Grayson

— Mark Krebs Jr.(@MarkKrebs12) December 12, 2012

I was happy to see Enes Kanter return to Twitter this week:

Ohh Yeahh!! Great win tonight. Feels great to beat Lakers. One more time everyone played JAZZ basketball. Love being here. #JazzMan4lifeBABY

— Enes Kanter (@Enes_Kanter) December 10, 2012

We need more random pics, Enes. I’m taking feathered hat, small people on shoulders, trick shot pictures. Don’t let anyone tame the Enes.

Perry, they may keep getting smaller, but you stay the same size. **Matthew McConaughey voice**

Are the UK cheerleaders getting smaller? I can put them all in my pocket! #LittleCuties

— Perry Stevenson (@PSteve2122) December 9, 2012

Seriously digging Patrick Graffree’s UK hair:

#TBT when I put this in my head. Everybody thought I was trying to be like Nerlens… #DONTGEEK #FRESH twitter.com/PatGraffree52/…

— Patrick Graffree (@PatGraffree52) December 13, 2012

Also digging the end of semester parties, although is there anything more cruel than your friends leaving you to go party when you’re the only one with a final left?

IM DONE WITH THIS SEMESTER! EVERYBODY PARTY AT MY DORM! #BALDWINHALL

— Patrick Graffree (@PatGraffree52) December 13, 2012

Oh, of course Taylor Wyndham was talking about Forestry…

Nothing like studying some wood in the morning… forestry sucks

— Taylor Wyndham (@TaylorWyndham) December 13, 2012

Congrats to LaRod King, who has been invited to play in The Texas vs the Nation All-Star game:

Just got invited to the Texas vs Nation game #blessed

— La’Rod King (@Kingof_UK) December 13, 2012

What’s up with the toilet paper shortage at the UK library?

Finding toilet paper in Willy T is equivalent to winning the lottery

— Patrick Towles (@patty_ice14) December 10, 2012

Note to self: do not sneak up on Josh Clemons.

Almost asleep and my mom walks in my room. I jumped up and almost attacked her.. Smh.. Scared the mess outta me

— Josh Clemons (@J_Clem20) December 13, 2012

Alan Cutler retweeted this, which cracks me up. Of course he would retweet something about people sneaking up on other people.

Is there anything Randall Cobb can’t do?

Even that chunk of turf in his helmet is impressive:

@rcobb18 I see you!!!! Ballin!!! UK twitter.com/WoodDro52/stat…

— Wesley Woodyard (@WoodDro52) December 10, 2012

You know something is a worldwide phenomenon when Coach Brooks tweets about it:

Today is 12/12/12. Not to many like that.

— Rich Brooks (@UKcoachbrooks) December 13, 2012

Who hasn’t had these moments with their parents?

My dad freaking out at not knowing how to hang up a call on the iPhone>>>>>>> He told me it’s harder than I think…dad, I have one too.

— Landon Foster (@BigBlueKick12) December 11, 2012

Atta boy dad. Atta boy. Point proven. twitter.com/BigBlueKick12/…

— Landon Foster (@BigBlueKick12) December 11, 2012

Ah, technology.

Children in UK gear are automatically contenders for “Tweets That Make You Go Aww”:

Good luck today. Put in some work for daddy twitter.com/danielserik/st…

— Erik Daniels (@danielserik) December 8, 2012

No Tweet Beat is complete without the “Rich Brooks Retirement Shot of the Day”:

Sunset from daughter Kasey’s house on Lake Oswego. Cold but great view. twitter.com/UKcoachbrooks/…

— Rich Brooks (@UKcoachbrooks) December 11, 2012

Seriously, these can’t be real:

Sunrise on the McKenzie river this morning. Weather is always different looking down from our house. twitter.com/UKcoachbrooks/…

— Rich Brooks (@UKcoachbrooks) December 9, 2012

In the “Bookie Tweet of the Week,” Bookie is a little confused about the Mayan Apocalypse:

I thought the world was pose to end on 12.12.12 lien BASTARDS..

— Booke Uptown â„¢103 (@bookie3_FLYA) December 12, 2012

Actually…

Well i just got the word it’s pose to be on the 21..

— Booke Uptown â„¢103 (@bookie3_FLYA) December 12, 2012

Okay, good. Until next time, RT plz?