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University of Kentucky Basketball, Football, and Recruiting news brought to you in the most ridiculous manner possible.

Tweet Beat: Prairie Dog Preaches

As part of the never-ending quest to bring you University of Kentucky news in the most ridiculous manner possible, I comb the Twitter-verse each week for the funniest, oddest, and sometimes, nearly illegible tweets from your favorite players and personalities. Basically, I read Twitter so you don’t have to. Without further ado, here are the best tweets of the week.

We have to start with Perry Stevenson. Prairie Dog is already a Tweet Beat All-Star for his random and witty tweets on life, but this week, he tweeted with a purpose, and it was spectacular. Perry played under Billy Gillispie back in the day, and therefore has many stories, some of which surely include Pop Tarts. After word spread about Gillispie’s all-too-familiar mistreatment of players at Texas Tech, Perry had to chime in:

For reasons I can’t understand, some people didn’t take too kindly to Perry’s tweets. His response?

For the love of Rupp Arena, please write this book, Perry. In the meantime, congrats: you’re the inaugural member of the Tweet Beat Hall of Fame

Jodie Meeks might write one, too…

Back to the current crop of Cats, who thankfully will never have to tell stories about Billy Gillispie.

Unless Willie Cauley-Stein is reading “Fifty Shades of Gray” in his bed at the Wildcat Lodge, “smutty” must not have the same definition it once did…

That being said, boy cleans up nicely:

Bowtie FTW.

I would be embarrassed for Jarrod Polson here, but I’m too busy being jealous of him for getting to live in a place where recliners outnumber normal chairs:

Major #truth:

Same goes with “Pawn Stars,” “American Pickers” and “House Hunters.”

Have no fear: the flat top is here to stay.

Patrick Patterson’s TBT is a shoo-in for “Tweets That Make You Go Aww”:

Oh, hey, Mark Krebs, TBT means “Throwback Thursday”:

It’s okay. I only learned that a few weeks ago. #old

Oh, fine, we’ll have two TTMYGA winners this week:

I think Enes may have borrowed WCS’ copy of “Fifty Shades of Gray”…

I saw this and for a split second thought he was talking about the Cats:

Wishful thinking much?

Derek Anderson‘s got some work to do before next weekend!

Really, Anthony?

PPatt raises a good question:

It’s fine if she’s confident and not cocky. Case and point: Beyonce is confident. Kim Kardashian? Ugh. Cocky doesn’t even cover it.

Congrats to Mark Krebs for popping the question!

Nicely done, Mark. But, I’m a little disappointed that my family didn’t get me and Mr. TT a cake when we announced our engagement. Hmm.

My advice? Elope or hire a wedding planner. It is so not worth the stress.

Just to clear up any confusion, Boogie is a Kentucky basketball fan and an Alabama football fan. Got it?

Corey Peters witnessed a woman in Kroger just trying to help her fellow shoppers out:

Or maybe she just really likes to shuck?

I guess when you’re an offensive lineman, this is an acceptable bedtime snack:

Speaking of snacks, I think Andre Woodson may have a problem:

Please don’t make me answer this, Winston.

Another week, another new segment. Papa Brooks is living the high life of a retiree, and has the tweets to prove it. Each week, I’ll post the one that makes me the most jealous in a segment entitled “Lifestyles of the Rich and Retired.” This week, Rich and Karen traveled to Blitzen, Oregon, which is so pretty I’m convinced that’s where Microsoft goes to take pictures for their Windows wallpapers:

In this week’s “Kids These Days with Derek Anderson,” Derek warns us about pretty girls with potty mouths:

This week, Bookie celebrated a birthday! And, it looks like he got some mad birthday swag:

Big pack, indeed. Until next time, RT plz?

Article written by Mrs. Tyler Thompson

No, I will not make you a sandwich, but you can follow me on Twitter @MrsTylerKSR or email me.

19 Comments for Tweet Beat: Prairie Dog Preaches

  1. mike
    10:05 pm September 6, 2012 Permalink

    Prairie* Dog Preaches

  2. duane tracy
    10:23 pm September 6, 2012 Permalink

    You go Perry:

    Nice job….Billy needs help…as with most predators….they rely on the silence of others…no more silence BCG!

  3. CalsFatStomach
    10:25 pm September 6, 2012 Permalink

    Perry was an Akron type talent anyway. He should be kissing BCG’s beanbag for keeping him on the team.

  4. Henry Earl
    10:37 pm September 6, 2012 Permalink

    saw prairie hand a bum a 50 outside of the Kroger on Euclid not 2 months ago. dude was almost in tears. thats all, just wanted to get anecdotal for a sec.

  5. 44 Stitches
    10:46 pm September 6, 2012 Permalink

    I hate to call Bookie out but the watch is more than likely some New Orleans flea market bullshhh fake. The band looks like a Gucci band from every bit of ten years ago. The face of the watch is a new school one and comes on two different types of bands but doesn’t come on a band like that one. In less it’s a watch made up of Gucci parts that is not one you can buy in a store. Let’s be real people that have money don’t brag on having money only broke people who think they have money do.

  6. Henry Earl
    10:50 pm September 6, 2012 Permalink

    5. keep it in your pants, Patrick Bateman. who gives a f*ck.

  7. AMG
    10:52 pm September 6, 2012 Permalink

    Yeah, good one #3. You know those 4 star players, they’re only good enough for Akron! Dumbass.

  8. 44 Stitches
    10:59 pm September 6, 2012 Permalink

    @6… Did that hit a little to close for home Henry Earl? Who in the hell is Patrick Bateman?

  9. Sheriff Buford T. Justice
    11:05 pm September 6, 2012 Permalink

  10. Sheriff Buford T. Justice
    11:06 pm September 6, 2012 Permalink

    8. See above youtube link

  11. Henry Earl
    11:17 pm September 6, 2012 Permalink

    8. take a break from jacking it to GQ and read a book sometime.

  12. HeshimuEvans'2ndgradeTeacher
    11:41 pm September 6, 2012 Permalink

    Challenge: Say Clare Krebs 10 times real fast

  13. Jvice
    12:11 am September 7, 2012 Permalink

    12- is it too hard to say he’s the protagonist from American Psycho? A book no one would have heard of but for the movie… Same goes for fight club.

  14. Henry Earl
    12:36 am September 7, 2012 Permalink

    14. no, that wouldn’t have been too hard at all, but it wasn’t what I wanted to write. and I read that book before I knew there was a movie. the book is also 10x better/more f*cked up.

    not sure where Fight Club came from, but I agree. that’s definitely one case where I like the movie adaptation much better than the book.

  15. mocha
    3:18 am September 7, 2012 Permalink

    Proposal in Brio?

  16. seriously
    8:49 am September 7, 2012 Permalink

    i completely agree #16…c’mon man, brio? it’s supposed to be the biggest moment of you life and you take her to a chain smh

  17. Diorio's Pizza
    12:01 pm September 7, 2012 Permalink

  18. bluebloodtoo
    1:14 pm September 7, 2012 Permalink

    Ok, maybe I’m missing something here, but did anyone else see a reindeer in RBrooks picture? WTH is a blitzen if it’s not one of Rudolph’s pulling crew?