Tweet Beat: Nerlens Knows
As part of the never-ending quest to bring you University of Kentucky news in the most ridiculous manner possible, I comb the Twitter-verse each week for the funniest, oddest, and sometimes, nearly illegible tweets from your favorite players and personalities. Basically, I read Twitter so you don’t have to. Without further ado, here are the best tweets of the week.
We’ll begin with Tweet Beat’s newest segment, “Nerlens Knows.” Making me wonder if he’s actually a robot designed to be the ideal Kentucky player, Nerlens has started tweeting rap lyrics each morning in the manner of Jay Bilas, except instead of ending with “I gotta go to work,” he signs his tweets with “I gotta get #9.” Here’s my favorite from this week:
Ball so hard they call me a realist. Jay just mad cuz i got better hair than Bilas ! I gtta get #9. #BBN #SwagChamp
— Nerlens Noel (@NerlensNoel3) April 30, 2012
#nerlensknows
Brian Long got dress pants! Hooray, he won’t look like a hobo when he meets the President tomorrow!
The man, the myth, the legend @BrianLong32 twitter.com/hoodyhood4/sta…
— Jon Hood (@hoodyhood4) May 2, 2012
Memories…light the corners of my mind…
Sniff sniff.
Another item to add to MKG‘s resume for Big Blue Sainthood: his visit to the Children’s Hospital to spread joy those in need.
Just left the Kentucky Children’s Hospital. Humbled to see all the children and their passion in life
— Mike Kidd-Gilchrist (@MikeGillie14) May 3, 2012
Anthony Davis also gives back:
Presenting check to Shriners Childrens Hospital. Always a Blessing to have the opportunity to give back! twitter.com/AntDavis23/sta…
— Anthony Davis (@AntDavis23) April 28, 2012
Something tells me Eloy’s extra gear is all spoken for by now:
If any of the fan want some kentucky gear xxl.. I have a lot stuff that I can give you. Hmu
— Eloy Vargas (@E_Vargas30) May 3, 2012
WBA faced off on the tennis court, and this time, it was Jarrod Polson that bested Kyle Wiltjer.
@jpolson05 you got lucky, I’m still a little rusty
— Kyle Wiltjer (@kwiltj) April 30, 2012
Before you get nervous about Kyle’s hand-eye coordination, fear not: big Wiltj got him back on the basketball court, the only place that matters.
Just beat @jpolson05 in basketball. Wasn’t a come back of the ages because it wasn’t close
— Kyle Wiltjer (@kwiltj) April 30, 2012
Sam Malone supports my theory that people should be required to wear name tags at all times (it would save so much unnecessary drama!):
Everytime I meet someone new I forgot their name within 6 seconds of them telling me
— Sam Malone (@SamMaloneuk13) May 3, 2012
Twany’s tattoos made the news!
I am a girl and I am saying this is true:
Tell a girl 1,000,000 times that she is beautiful, she wont believe you. Tell her she is ugly 1 time, oh that will never forget!
— Eloy Vargas (@E_Vargas30) May 2, 2012
The Real T. Jones continues to be a gentleman:
everyone at Kroger sorry that were running a little late, but I want you all to know how excited I am to see you!
— Terrence Jones (@TerrenceJones1) April 28, 2012
Congrats to Stone Cold Willow, who was able to take a much-needed trip to the dentist this week thanks to the charity of several friends, including Terrence Jones. Let’s hope those new chompers don’t stop Willow from smoothing that back out.
Boogie‘s wording of this tweet is…unfortunate:
What’s a good spot to get tatted in sac?
— demarcus cousins(@boogiecousins) May 1, 2012
…and he knows it:
Sac as in Sacramento lol
— demarcus cousins(@boogiecousins) May 1, 2012
Erik Daniels, who is currently playing pro ball in Italy, describes one of the common drawbacks of living in Europe:
I’m so glad I get to leave next week. I’m so tired of walking up 62 stairs everytime I come home
— Erik Daniels (@danielserik) April 30, 2012
Derek Anderson will have his nostalgia with a side of fries, please.
At McDonalds in UK campus. Had to have a flashback before practice lol. Still good service
— Derek L. Anderson(@DerekLAnderson) May 3, 2012
The best part about this picture? Those are Walter’s actual jerseys:
My babies #bbn twitter.com/waltermccarty/…
— Walter McCarty (@waltermccarty) May 2, 2012
Perry Stevenson fought back against the grammar police on the most common grammar mistake EVER:
Sorry we have grammar police on patrol. You’re you’re you’re you’re you’re you’re you’re you’re you’re you’re. Better? I like “ur” anyway.
— Perry Stevenson (@PSteve2122) April 30, 2012
The Harrellson family: all denim, all the time.
Hey Josh, with summer around the corner, I fully expect a family jortrait.
Is there a more perfect creature than Keyla Snowden? (No, no there is not.)
Stop making me jealous of your life, Josh Hopkins!
Kudos to Ashley Judd for her work with Snooty Giggles, an animal rescue service. Ashley has been tweeting pictures of Walter, a dog who was severely abused and starved by who former owners, who threw him from a car window with his yard stake still attached. It’s a story that will tug the heartstrings of any animal lover (or human being with a soul), and for that, she gets two big snaps from me.
#Walter I could stay like this forever. 3 hours went by in an instant. twitter.com/AshleyJudd/sta…
— ashley judd (@AshleyJudd) May 3, 2012
Amen, Morgan Newton:
You should never feel comfortable wearing a U of L shirt on UKs campus. EVER. even if its just May 1st
— Morgan Newton (@monewt12) May 1, 2012
Stevie Johnson traveled to Philly this week for groin surgery, but even an impending trip to the hospital didn’t stop him from asking sleeping strangers where the nearest cheese steak stand was:
Ummm Excuse Me Sir/Ma’am… Which way are The CheeseSteaks??? twitter.com/StevieJohnson1…
— Stevie Johnson (@StevieJohnson13) April 30, 2012
This week’s “Tweet That Makes You Go Awww” goes to Randall Cobb, who posted this gem of him and his father:
In your “Oh, Boyd Moment of the Week,” Aaron educates us about recycled goods:
is that yo chick? dudes lookin over like chhhh! i did that back in 06′
— Aaron Boydâ„¢ (@Oh_Boyd) April 30, 2012
Bookie tells us a little about the journey he’s on in this week’s “Bookie Tweet of the Week”:
WAT IT DO TWITTER, I came from the worst of the worst to doung Big Things…. RT if you keep it 1,000,000
— Bookie aka Flya (@bookie3_FLYA) April 28, 2012
RT if Tweet Beat keeps it 1,000,000?
20 Comments for Tweet Beat: Nerlens Knows
Good stuff again, Ms T.
By the way, why is that lanyard inserted into the nose of Ashley’s dog?
I am so glad to see all the things people are doing for stone cold willow. He is awesome and is w hat Kentucky is al about. I’m glad to see ksr is using their blessings to help others.
I did the same thing Stevie Johnson did, but in Chicago. I got thrown out of a McDonald’s and accused of making fun of homeless people…
love boogie’s tweets, hahahaha … that was hilarious
1-lol
4-Yes and the sac comment explained —was nice.
Lol misquote much? Memories light the corners of my mind. I hate the song, but those be the lyrics.
6- butt hole
@1, thats what you saw when looking at Ashley Judds picture?
8- It was the only thing I saw that I couldn’t figure out. umm-umm
😉
6 – I’ve never been so proud to misquote something.
#9 I’m trying to keep myself from saying something about her boobs not being able to stay like that forever and how 30 years went by in an instant lol
I keed I keed…
Why is Josh Hopkins in Italy with three gay dudes?
If I was Doron I would just take the thing.
I get a little happier every time I see this title. Good work as always, Tyler.
(1) maybe it’s a feeding tube?
Opie!
This post is like sunshine in my mouth
16- That would make sense, yes.
@1 – there’s a dog in that picture?