The Top Five Super Bowl Commercials (As Imagined by Me)

By C.M. Tomlin | February 5, 2007 | 12:53pm |

5. Rosie O’Donnell struck repeatedly in face with whiffleball bat (IBM)

4. Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan dropped into Grand Canyon (Frito-Lay)

3. Jay-Z completes coverage of all avenues of advertising not covered by rappers (Tampax)