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University of Kentucky Basketball, Football, and Recruiting news brought to you in the most ridiculous manner possible.

The KSR Mailbag, Vol. 1, No. 8

Welcome to the KSR Mailbag! The idea for this feature wasn’t born from the many, many mailbags associated with sports blogs and TV shows…oh, no, that’s way too cliche. The KSR Mailbag was born from the halftime break in KSR’s live blogs, during which I would take over for the guys while they went to use the bathroom or flirt with the lady in charge of the nacho cheese dispenser. During those halftimes, you and I talked about just about anything: life, love, the pursuit of happiness, Triscuits vs. Wheat Thins…you name it, we covered it. Heck, sometimes we even talked about sports.

So think of this as the “halftime” of your week. Starting on Thursday of each week, tweet your questions to me @MrsTylerKSR with the hashtag #ksrmailbag, and if they’re worthy, they’ll make the cut and will be posted on Wednesday’s KSR Mailbag, along with my response. Leggo!

Wonderful question, Mr. Lentz. If I can’t talk you into coming out of KSR retirement, I guess I’ll have to handle the swimming portion. Both Matt and Drew are avid golfers, but since golf isn’t an Olympic sport until 2016, I’d say that they’d have the best chance for gold in doubles Table Tennis. If you’ll remember, Matt uses any chance to practice ping-pong, including dates (which may explain why he’s single), and Drew? Well, no one loves his Flex-O-Lite ping-pong paddle more than Mr. Franklin. Chris Thomas would make us proud in real tennis, while Ally Tucker would tap her inner Alex Morgan on the soccer pitch. Rashawn Franklin just looks athletic, so I’m going to guess he’s got track and field covered, and I hear Stuart Hammer has a mean shotput. John Wilmhoff is our baseball guru, but since baseball is no longer an Olympic sport, maybe he’d do well in Badminton? I’m not as familiar with the athletic prowess of the rest of the crew, but I know one thing for sure: Ryan Lemond would twirl a mean ribbon in rhythmic gymnastics.

Phil Dalhausser does bear a striking resemblance to Rex. Maybe Rex has been living a secret life in the sands of the beach volleyball court? …Naaaah.

I never thought I’d say it, but Bruce Pearl. However, I think just about anyone is more trustworthy than Pete Thamel, including the snake in Adam & Eve’s story. But, you bring up a fun topic. A friend and I were talking about what it was like to have Bruce back in college basketball (at least on TV) and naturally, barbeques came up, which led to the question: which college basketball coaches would you invite to a backyard barbeque? Here was my list:

John Calipari – Obviously, if only in hopes that he would bring the National Championship trophy
Bill Self – Self just seems like a pleasant man. Although he may wear a hairpiece, he’s friendly and seems like the kind of guy who would enjoy throwing back a few beers and joking around. Plus, he always says nice things about Kentucky.
Joe B. Hall – How else would we find out the best secret fishin holes in the state of Kentucky?
Anthony GrantNo words needed.
Trent Johnson – What can I say, the guy is hilarious and has a voice like James Earl Jones. Plus, I like how he makes his coaching staff wearing matching outfits.

Here’s who I would NOT invite:
Rick Pitino – Even though he’d only come for fifteen seconds, I like my tablecloths too much to put them through that.
Frank Martin – Sorry, no one wants to listen to Pitbull when they’re flipping burgers.
Tom Crean – There isn’t enough cheese in the world to go with that whine.
Kevin Stallings – So that’s where all the cheese went.

What, you’ve never heard of the Whitaker Bank Three Goggle?

Why yes, I’m glad you asked. In addition to an AARP discount, the KSR Shop now offers a whole line of senior products, including “Wildcat walkers,” oxygen tank decals, and electric blankets from the “Keep Warm with Roy Williams” blanket line. Use the promo code ENSURE for a 10% discount!

That would be just about the best thing ever, wouldn’t it? Although it has many critics, I’m afraid the one-year rule is around for a while. Switching to a two-year college minimum was mentioned during the NBA lockout negotiations last fall, but the league and the players’ association failed to come to a compromise over secondary issues, such as when rookies could enter free agency. Both sides seem to be open to making the switch, but certain concessions will have to be made, and getting a vote on the issue might be harder than you think. One thing is for sure: if enough people in the sport (especially well-respected and level-headed people like Jay Bilas) keep bringing it up, something has to happen. And if it does, game over, college basketball. Kentucky wins.

Wow, that’s tough. As someone who has watched more than her fair share of “Man vs. Food,” I’d have to give the nod to Drew. While Ryan enjoys him some pie, and definitely has room in that belly to put it away, I think Drew would be better at “powering through” the pain that comes with swallowing your tenth piece of apple pie. He does have a lot of practice with the Taco Bell party pack, after all. Boy knows how to binge. I could be wrong. Thoughts?

Keep the questions coming… @MrsTylerKSR.

Article written by Mrs. Tyler Thompson

No, I will not make you a sandwich, but you can follow me on Twitter @MrsTylerKSR or email me.

11 Comments for The KSR Mailbag, Vol. 1, No. 8

  1. Ginnie
    3:23 pm August 1, 2012 Permalink

    First off, I have a HUGE crush on Will Lentz! Second thing, I think Tyler doesn’t like me anymore because of that “Jason guy” from a couple of weeks ago. Hope he didn’t scare anybody off. I’m a really good person and an excellent representative of #BBN.

  2. Cliver
    3:27 pm August 1, 2012 Permalink

    Dalhauser looks a lot more like Billy Corgan than Rex Chapman.

  3. huh
    3:56 pm August 1, 2012 Permalink

    Don’t get the Anthony Grant part. Guessing you’ve got some fever

  4. C.A.T.S.
    4:05 pm August 1, 2012 Permalink

    You mean to tell me that you wouldn’t invite Bob Huggins to your barbeque?

  5. Cat in the ATL
    4:19 pm August 1, 2012 Permalink

    3. A little racist or just jealous that Grant has you beat in looks any day of the week?

  6. bruce pearl
    4:28 pm August 1, 2012 Permalink

    Now you know I love a good BBQ. Aaron Craft is coming with if that’s cool.

  7. BPsycho
    4:43 pm August 1, 2012 Permalink

    Will Lents was the ****. Cheesy line in 3, 2, you don’t know what kind of writers KSR has until they’re gone.


  8. jhnny
    4:43 pm August 1, 2012 Permalink

    Tyler Thompson!!!!!!!! (You did not write that about Rick Pitino). LOL.

  9. BPsycho
    4:49 pm August 1, 2012 Permalink

    Holy **** I missed your line about Pitino. That’s like top 5 greatest thing you’ve ever posted lol

  10. Me
    10:11 pm August 1, 2012 Permalink

    Maybe if you didn’t invite sleazy two-bit whores to your barbeque then you wouldn’t have to worry about RickyP coming at all.

  11. catdaddyd
    10:23 pm August 1, 2012 Permalink

    Don’t get the Anthony Grant part either? Looked like his bow tie was UK blue.