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Stories and Lines for your Upcoming Weekend


Which one of you bloggers was supposed to be doing my laundry?

This coming weekend has all the makings for a great couple days in the life of a UK fan.  With the basketball season continuing to start and our friends from Richmond coming to play on the gridiron there is plenty of Wildcat action to turn our attention to.  That being said, when your girlfriends (or boyfriends, for all our female readers, aka Kate) ask you which team the blue one is, here are a few quick stories you can tell them to watch for.

The Great Wall of Kentucky – As you may be familiar with (and if you aren’t, there is no reason for you to be reading this,) John Wall starts his National Player of the Year campaign Friday night.  Kind of.  Rupp Arena is playing host to the Clarion Golden Eagles, who look to put up all the fight of a wet noodle in a rain storm.  It is less of a matter of  ‘If John Wall will dominate,’ but more of a matter of ‘how.’ After waiting an entire off season plus one exhibition game, we will finally get a glimpse of the wildcat that many national media players all but guarantee will be the number one draft pick next year, and I couldn’t be more excited.

Imaginary bet: Over/Under on total degrees spun by John Wall’s Dunks during the game is set at 539.

Patrick Patterson’s New Truck – PPat’s new truck must have had engine troubles when trying to get him to the Campbellsville game, because as much as the “new truck = new attitude” line as been repeated (and mocked for fallacies,) he certainly wasn’t firing on all cylinders against the Tigers.  Finishing with only four points (yes, a full seven points less than Perry-The-Stevensons total,) a lot of questions began to arise about just how well he would be able to fit in to Cal’s system.  What you need to look for Friday night is how well the offense is being run. It’s well understood that the game against CU was sloppy at best, and if the team is executing better, you can bet Patterson will be back in Ford F-150 form.

Imaginary bet: Over/Under on announcers mentioning how happy UK fans are to have Patrick back for another year is set at 4.5.

The Tale of Three QBs Continues – Or does it?  Since Mike Hartline went down, UK Football fans have never been quite sure who is going to be under center at any given point. (Only that Randall Cobb will, in fact, not be there when the game matters most.)  With the closest thing to a BYE week coming up, will we see the continued benching of Will Fidler?  Will the coaching staff learn that it’s not against the rules to throw from a wildcat formation?  Will Morgan Newton take the lambeau leap?  Will Bryan the Intern show up and take us to the promised land? My guesses are yes, no, yes, and yes – he can.

Imaginary bet: Over/Under on times Joker effectively runs a bubble screen is set at 1.5.

KSR Podcast Has Yet to be Canceled – Is it presumptuous to say that something we are doing is one of the most important sotrylines of the weekend?  I don’t believe so.  Last week we regaled you with stories of ‘kissing in the club,’ Alan Cutler chasing Woo, and feats of Herculean Effort brought to you by Jeremy Jarmon.  With the likes of Ryan Lemond, Woo, and our Motley Crue, this could be the single most important podcast in fake journalistic history.  Not to mention early reports have it broadcasting from the bathroom stall Josh Harrellson once called home.

Imaginary bet: Over/Under on Drew Franklin references to being hungover is set at 12.5.

All in all, it should be a good weekend to be a UK sports fan.  Go Big Blue.

Article written by Will Lentz