OK, so, during the dragging, sweaty, uncomfortable months of summer, we flippantly mentioned that we would be profiling every player on the team. It will only be fun and worthwhile, we decided, if we were both informative AND funny. Well, it would be really fun if we were drunk the entire time, but that’s neither here nor there. Thus, for these ten weeks leading up to the UL game, we will have at least one profile a day. We hope you enjoy these as much as we enjoyed the idea of doing them, but not the actual task. Oh, and we see the egregious “that’s what she said” in the headline.
We’d also like to use this italicized space to apologize to the families of the players whose last names end in ‘A’ or ‘B’ because these early ones might suck a little.
Boring, Obligatory Vitals
Hometown–Cincinnati (Indian Hills)
Unfair comparison to NFL-er: Cris Collinsworth. Both lanky, white receivers from the Cincy area. Well, at least Collinsworth lives there now. His house is huge. You should check it out. Ft. Thomas, maybe…?
Most interesting fact from his media guide bio: He has no media guide bio. In fact, I can’t find anything out about him, anywhere. He is Facebook friends with Moncel Allen, so I’m pretty sure he’s on the team.
Something we made up about him: Finds cicadas insanely annoying.
Items of legitimate interest: I’m pretty sure he played basketball in high school. At least someone named “Hendricks” played for his high school a few years ago.
Outlook for 2008, based on light research by our minions: Dead last on the depth chart. Wears #90. Doesn’t look good for playing time.
***Update***: He may have quit the team.