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Kentucky Sports Radio

University of Kentucky Basketball, Football, and Recruiting news brought to you in the most ridiculous manner possible.

Short and Insufficient Profile: Jeremy Jarmon

OK, so, during the dragging, sweaty, uncomfortable months of summer, we flippantly mentioned that we would be profiling every player on the team. It will only be fun and worthwhile, we decided, if we were both informative AND funny. Well, it would be really fun if we were drunk the entire time, but that’s neither here nor there. Thus, for these ten weeks leading up to the UL game, we will have at least one profile a day. We hope you enjoy these as much as we enjoyed the idea of doing them, but not the actual task. Oh, and we see the egregious “that’s what she said” in the headline.

We’d also like to use this italicized space to apologize to the families of the players whose last names end in ‘A’ or ‘B’ because these early ones might suck a little.

Um, Jeremy, you’re not going to get much playing time carrying the ball like that!

Boring, Obligatory Vitals

Height–6’3”

Weight–285

40–4.7…Good Lord

Year–Junior

Position–Defensive End

Hometown–Collierville, TN (Houston)

Unfair comparison to NFL-er: Easy. Lawrence Taylor…from Tecmo Bowl. Jarmon can be compared to no mere mortal, so I have to get creative and use the alarmingly fast and violent player from a video game.

Most interesting fact from his media guide bio: Graduated high school at age 17. Wait. So did I…that’s not interesting; he must have a summer birthday or something. Also, he’s appeared in several plays and is a member of the French Club. Oui Oui!

Something we made up about him: Matt Stafford called him a “drama geek.” Matt Stafford ended up looking like this.

Items of legitimate interest: I’m not sure what exactly to say here, other than Jarmon is a complete beast. Fourth in the SEC in sacks last year; All-SEC first team by Rivals, 2nd team by the coaches; 10th in the league in tackles for loss last season; forced two fumbles against Arkansas; and was named co-defensive player of the year on the team last season, along with Woodyard.

Outlook for 2008, based on light research by our minions: One of the top pass rushers in the league, Jarmon has garnered some preseason publicity. I drool at the thought of him blind-siding Hunter Cantwell. Seriously, there’s drool all over my keyboard. It’s kind of gross.

Article written by Evan Hilbert