OK, so, during the dragging, sweaty, uncomfortable months of summer, we flippantly mentioned that we would be profiling every player on the team. It will only be fun and worthwhile, we decided, if we were both informative AND funny. Well, it would be really fun if we were drunk the entire time, but that’s neither here nor there. Thus, for these ten weeks leading up to the UL game, we will have at least one profile a day. We hope you enjoy these as much as we enjoyed the idea of doing them, but not the actual task. Oh, and we see the egregious “that’s what she said” in the headline.
We’d also like to use this italicized space to apologize to the families of the players whose last names end in ‘A’ or ‘B’ because these early ones might suck a little.
Boring, Obligatory Vitals
Hometown–Memphis, TN (Whitehaven)
Unfair comparison to NFL-er: Antoine Winfield. Dimensionally speaking, he and Faulkner are almost exactly the same.
Most interesting fact from his media guide bio: Scored somewhere in the 30’s on his ACT. That’s really good—it’s only out of 36! By comparison, Beisner got a 7.
Something we made up about him: Got drunk off Gatorade and sugar cubes one night and rewrote the entire Benjy section of The Sound and the Fury. It is currently in circulation throughout numerous periodicals, and it’s titled “The Most Confusing Thing Ever Written…Ever, Ever, EVER.” Kind of a clunky name, I’d say.
Items of legitimate interest: On the SEC academic honor roll last season. Has also been named scout team player of the week three times in his two year career after walking-on in 2006.
Outlook for 2008, based on light research by our minions: Probably won’t see much action this season. Described as coach-able and a great practice player, though, so expect some more scout team honors.