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University of Kentucky Basketball, Football, and Recruiting news brought to you in the most ridiculous manner possible.

Samuel Clemens’ Saturday News and Views

Good evening ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, children of all ages and welcome to the final News and Views for the month of November. That’s right in just one hour December will be upon us and all those who partook of No Shave November can free themselves from the scourge of uncontrolled facial hair. Tonight’s views are brought to you by one Samuel Clemens who looks to celebrate Movember pretty hard himself. Clemons is one of the most famous men that ever lives although you may know him better by his pen name, Mark Twain. Twain was born on this day in 1835 as Haley’s Comet flew over the Earth and went on to become the father of American literature. Twain penned such classics as the Adventures of Tom Sawyer, Huckleberry Finn, and a Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court. Those three works in turn resulted in an awesome Rush song, the decline of censorship, and influenced the greatest movie of all time, Army of Darkness. Twain would die one day after Haley’s comet circled the Earth once again just as he had wished. Twain was quoted as saying “The Almighty has said, no doubt: ‘Now here are these two unaccountable freaks; they came in together, they must go out together.”

RIP Sam, on to the News and Views:

-So the young Cats lost their second game of the year last night and must now face a quick turnaround to play just two days later. A tough task for any team but the game adds an extra layer of drama as they must face one of the many teams they knocked out of last year’s NCAA tournament, the Baylor Bears. Both teams had to give up much to the NBA draft but Baylor brings back a few guys who have to be hungry for revenge. Despite that storyline UK opened as a 7.5 point favorite.

-Chief among those players out for vengeance has to be Brady Heslip who was held to just four points in the elite eight match up. Heslip has been out for the past 10 days after an emergency appendectomy but wouldn’t you know it, the kid is going to be back in time to play in Rupp Arena. Back in March that handsome devil Andrew Cassady profiled the sharp shooter for KSR. Give it a read before giving him a boo tomorrow afternoon.

-Cal spoke with the media today where he said that the Wildcats are simply a “November basketball team” and that they need to develop “a will to win and a competitive spirit.” Hopefully that spirit develops as they become a December basketball team tomorrow and if it doesn’t I see no way they become a March/April basketball team.

-Around the NBA, former Cat Terrance Jones was sent down to the D-League today as playing time for PFs is sparse in Houston. The move shouldn’t be much of a surprise considering the Rocket’s front office moves in the past. Our guy Patrick Patterson was sent down back in November of 2010 and things have worked out pretty well for him. Expect Jones to get called back up as the logjam at the forward position begins to clear up.

-A quick Happy Birthday to the man, the myth, the legend Joe B. Hall. Hall turns a cool 84 today and also shares a birthday with Ellen Calipari. Happy birthday to two of the Cats with the best seats for every game.

– While our new coach Mark Stoops won’t be on campus until Sunday the fine folks on campus have already started rolling out the welcome wagon. Langston Newton tweeted out the above photo of the Nutter Field House which has been decked out for Mark. Tomorrow night our new coach is in action as FSU takes on Georgia Tech for the ACC championship, a bet a bunch of TVs in the bluegrass will now be tuning in.

-Also on the field is the SEC championship, which will determine who gets the privilege to pummel Notre Dame for the 7th straight SEC national champion. If Georgia wins the game it would create an interesting tidbit for Cat fans. That would put Georgia, Florida, Louisville, and Kent St (so close) in the BCS meaning the Cats had to take on 3 of the 10 teams. Talk about a tough schedule.

– A big congrats to the volleyball team as they took down ETSU tonight in Memorial to advance in the NCAA tournament. The ladies will now take on Ohio State in the second round tomorrow at 7:00. Get out and support #WeAreUK


Well November was a very eventful month around Big Blue Nation. The basketball team finally made their debut and have already demonstrated what will make them great as well as the things that will keep us all up at night. November brought about an end to the Joker Phillips era while also bringing us a new coach in Mark Stoops. The Stoops hire also brings great hope for recruiting and facility upgrades so there is much to be optimistic about on the field. The future is also bright on the court as well as we already inked the number one recruiting class for next year and it can only go up. November was an up and down month overall but one that has us all excited for what comes next. Hopefully December will bring news just as good or better than what November gave us. Looking at you Coley and Towns.


Article written by Andrew Cassady

Follow me @ACassady_KSR

46 Comments for Samuel Clemens’ Saturday News and Views

  1. Bad Analogy
    11:08 pm November 30, 2012 Permalink

    PPat and T. Jones are on completely different levels. T Jones probably has more talent/potential, but PPat has a great work ethic. I don’t believe Jones aka Selfish Mother F***** is the same.

    11:32 pm November 30, 2012 Permalink



    859.455.6853 CALL/TEXT

  3. SMH
    11:37 pm November 30, 2012 Permalink

    It’s TerrEnce Jones. Seriously, how can our players’ names be misspelled on so many occasions???

  4. Cat's Fan
    11:51 pm November 30, 2012 Permalink

    Is it football season yet? GBB!!!

  5. Blue Jesus
    12:01 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    In retrospect our blowout win over Kent St. is pretty weird…

  6. tyson
    12:17 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    Can we make Mrs. Tyler Thompson the all time News and Views poster? She doesn’t phone it in like everyone else at BSR (Barnhart Sports Radio) seems to be doing lately.

  7. SEC vs Big East Challenge
    12:30 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    When will the SEC teams EVER decide to make ANY effort to be decent in college basketball ?? They get SWEPT tonight across the board and down 6-2 vs BE teams!!! Even friggin DEPAUL wins @ Auburn!!! The SEC just SUCKS in college Basketball. SUCKS!

  8. UKBlue
    12:55 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    Hour 2 of the podcast is being held for ransom by middle east sports radio.

  9. Mike Hunt
    12:59 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    Anthony Davis took the 5th most shots on this team.

  10. Manbearpig
    1:04 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    Awesome Rush song??? Does that exist? They were Nickelback before Nickelback

  11. Manbearpig
    1:11 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    #8 so the terrorists still haven’t realized their target is (which Pete Rose is on for some reason)

  12. Themeekshallinheret
    1:12 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    Jodie goes 7 for 8 beyond the arc, including 5 in the 2nd quarter! Also gets some sportscenter love. Congrats Jodie, you make the BBN proud!

  13. burgur
    1:47 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    #10 – Manbearpig – You are a musical buffoon.

    Neil Peart (of Rush) is one of the top 3 rock drummers of the past 30 years (John Bonham, Danny Carey – the other 2).

    Before you begin to speak, know your subject matter or else you just look ignorant.

  14. Micki DeMoss's Mustache
    2:07 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    Was at the Marshall Co. Hoopfest tonight. A few thoughts:

    1. Andrew Wiggins is the real deal. Didn’t have an explosive game, but exudes raw talent. If he can add a few post moves to his skill set and a bit of muscle, he will be unstoppable.

    2. Gorgui Deng’s brother plays for Oak Hill and has literally the tiniest ankles and wrists I’ve ever seen.

    3. Can the Harrison Twins come to UK at Christmas? These guys can at any time play any position on the court, save center. Andrew is the better ball handler of the two, but Aaron went for 28 and was pretty clutch down the stretch. They remind me a lot of Derrick Jasper, if he had actual talent. Athletic, but long for the PG position is a deadly combination.

    4. Tom Crean must use a ruler to part his hair – that thing was dead straight. He got announced over the PA and was booed by most of the crowd.

    5. Joe B. Hall is the man. Stayed from 6:00-on and signed autographs nearly the entire time (on his birthday, no less). Never once did I see him turn anybody away, regardless of age. Also, for what it’s worth, I got a chance to speak with him and he said he thinks this year’s Cats will be fine, and Wiggins will come to Kentucky.

  15. VigilantCat
    2:36 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    Hey…I am no longer having my girlfriend call me rich brooks during sex….it is now Mark Stoops….of course she was cool with it until I started screaming Rick Brooks during sex too.

  16. Cat85
    6:55 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    You’re a complete idiot
    If we don’t win today
    We can’t become a march/April team
    Dear god
    No one was happy with the notre dame effort
    Give the kids a break
    You all sound just like Brandon knights year
    O this teams gonna last 2 rounds and they go to the final four
    They will be fine. Growing pains can suck
    Go Cats

  17. Prog Rock
    7:31 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    Let’s be clear about something. Nickelback is Top 40 Radio pablum after Top 40 Radio has died. Nickelback
    is “teenager rock” which is made to appeal to the lowest common denominator of white middle class
    people drinking beer.

    RUSH? You compared N’back to RUSH? I agreed with the poster who referred to the “Rush/N’back”
    poster as a “musical buffoon”. Truer words have never been spoken.

  18. Rock Music
    7:56 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    Nickelback is a Pearl Jam wanna be, and they’re not even STP. They do not belong in the same conversation with RUSH.

  19. RealCatsFan
    8:19 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    18, Don’tChuBeMessin’ with my STP, now, my man! Any band that names themselves something like that just to pizz off the radio executives has my vote. (Look it up if you don’t know.) Besides, they rock – as long as they can keep Scott Weiland sober.

    Agree that Rush is awesome. Best song – Spirit of the Radio.

  20. RealCatsFan
    8:20 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    14, who was in the crowd to represent UK? Or is Cal and Co planning to hit the evening session?

  21. MacGruber
    8:34 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    13. Not!

  22. BravoBigBlue
    8:41 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    Bench Wiltjer. He’s a disgrace to all white people.

  23. Rock Music
    8:53 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    19: Relax…Love some STP Purple and Tiny Music. Didn’t know Weiland and sober belong in the same sentence.

  24. tdogg40330
    8:55 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    GO BIG BLUE !!!

  25. bung
    9:02 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    we can’t run but we can hide…

  26. SexnNursinHomes
    9:03 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    Ya’ll are all wrong. Oderus Urungus and Slymenstra Hymen says GWAR will slay Rush and N’Back, then disembowel them in to a pot of boiling nitro-acid sulfur carbonate.

  27. Code Red Seven
    9:15 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    Does Ricky finish before I start working?

  28. BaylorFan
    9:16 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    We are going to whip your candy [email protected]!!!

  29. bung
    9:19 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    Hood should get lots of minutes…

  30. Nursing Home = Death
    9:25 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    No, SINH you’re a music buffoon too. Just because everything isn’t in someone’s face and shocking
    and just dying for some attention doesn’t mean it’s weak or bad. You think those of us who like music
    around here never heard or listened to Burzum or Lamb of God or Emperor or Drawn & Quartered
    or Maiden or Sadistic Intent or Coffin Texts or on and on and on ad nauseum? If you claim to love
    music and can’t at least appreciate the expertise and talent of the likes of Neil Peart, well, yeah,
    you’re just an attention-starved buffon; nothing more, and nothing less.

  31. getalife
    9:32 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    you need to turn your tv ,radio and computer off for a whole day and think about what you wrote.

  32. UKFanInCincy
    9:32 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    I am in New York City on 5th street, where is a good place to watch the game today?

    Thanks in advance!

  33. getalife
    9:35 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    #26 and #30^

  34. getalife
    9:38 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    Rupp Areana #32

  35. SexnNursinHomes
    9:40 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    30- oh, I’m a bufffoon, no doubt. But I’m dead-on correct about Oderus using his Cuttlefish of Cthulu to smear hot gooey substance on Neil Peart’s face. For the record I like Rush too.

  36. Big Card
    9:43 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    Can I ask a question… Are you really excited about Stoops, I mean seriously? I have never heard of the guy.

  37. Katdaddy
    9:52 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    This won’t ever be good with goodwin at point.period!

  38. I Would Be Remiss
    10:00 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    Nice job #1. What constructive analysis. Here is a suggestion for you: Go back to the hole you climbed out of and stay there until we call for you. Could be awhile…….

  39. CJdontsay
    10:02 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    #36 the courier journal dont write about anything but Pitino or Strong so you wouldnt have heard of him. Im from lou and the newspaper sux. It’s $1 now and a 10th of the size of what it was when it was a quater. Unless you dont get out of your little UofL world you wont hear of anybody else

  40. UK Freshmen
    10:06 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    That Brooks fella ain’t too pretty, is he?

  41. Manbearpig
    10:11 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    lol to Sexin trollin with the Gwar!

  42. SexnNursinHomes
    10:19 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    41- haha. I was definitely trollin’.

  43. Manbearpig
    10:27 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    #42 of all the bands you could have used, you had to go with Gwar and for that sir I will have a drink and fondle a senior citizen in your honor

  44. SexnNursinHomes
    10:46 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    43- hahahaha! CATS!!!!

  45. coach K Likes teeny weenies
    10:48 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    What is this Gwar and Sadistic roid bands you speak of 42,43? I like the Perry Como’s and Les Brown and his band of the renoun. You younger whipper snappers are out of control, I just saw on my black and white television set they had a commerical for a brazeer with something they call a Victor’s secret. What secret does Victor have?

  46. SexnNursinHomes
    11:04 am December 1, 2012 Permalink

    45- well played.