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Quick, Fake Summary: Wildcats Let It Happen Naturally

Patience isn’t Kentucky’s fans best virtue, when we’re in the mood for basketball football.

The football season couldn’t start fast enough. We needed to see if Hartline has actually improved (as Brooks and Joker had been telling us). We had to know if Chris Matthews lived up to the hype. We had see whether or defense would be good enough to keep us afloat in the SEC.

But Paw-Paw Brooks knew that when the time was right, football would burst forth. And the Kentucky fans at Paul Brown Stadium enjoyed an 42-0 victory against the Miami of Ohio Redhawks.

Mike Hartline shaved the ‘stash because he is so smooth. Mike was 18-27 for 222 yards and 2 TDs. Mike took the first quarter to get warmed up, then connected with Randall Cobb for the first touchdown of the season. Two possessions later, Hartline completes 5 passes to 5 different receivers, finding in the end Chris Matthews for a 21-yard touchdown.

Matthews made a great grab on his TD and ended with 4 receptions for 56 yards. Chris was one of 9 Wildcat receivers who caught passes today; none of them caught more passes than Randall Cobb, who had 7 receptions for 95 yards. Randall caused all sorts of problems for the Redhawks in the vaunted “wildcat” offense, as he was able to run 11-yards for another touchdown. Clearly this is a much improved Wide Reciving corps.

The defense definitely out-matched the Redhawks’ offense. Calvin Harrison and Trevard Lindley each had an interception, with Trevard running his back 25 yards for a TD. The defense allowed their first shutout since the Vanderbilt matchup in 1996, allowing the Redhawks only 188 yards total, 10 first downs, and getting 2 sacks.

Its important to note who we were playing; the effects of SEC Size and Speed ™ led the Wildcats to an easy victory. Hopefully Redhawks coach Mike Haywood can find some comfort from Leon Haywood: “It was meant to be. Don’t push it, don’t force it.”

Article written by The Fake Gimel Martinez

I may be fake, but my passion for UK sports is real. Probably put all my best work at and, so go there when I start coasting here.