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Not Jerry Tipton’s Friday Basketball Notebook

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The 2012-13 season is still a few weeks away. However, the guess here is that the Cats will not be able to improve upon last season’s performance, which saw losses to hated rival Indiana (which didn’t even make it past the Sweet 16 lol) and Vanderbilt (which is more known for its academics than athletics). To stay apprised and educated, follow me on Twitter @NotJerryTipton. Here’s the weekly notebook:

*Dream On: Earlier this week, Louisville Athletic Director Tom Jurich announced that he hopes to sign head basketball coach Rick Pitino to a contract extension through the year 2022. This is not what Kentucky fans wanted to hear, as it would guarantee a rough 10 years for the Cats. It’s basic math, really. Pitino has a career winning percentage of 73%. Statistically, in other words, he wins 10 out of every 14 games he coaches. And since he is currently 0-4 against John Calipari and Kentucky, this means that he is guaranteed to win the next 10 games in the series. Can you say “complete and utter domination?” Get ready, Big Blue Nation. The next decade figures to be a long one. And for those who doubt Pitino will still be coaching Louisville in 10 years, remember this: If Rick Pitino is known for anything, it’s his ability to last for a long, long time.

*Same Old Song And Dance: On Monday, the media picked Kentucky to win the SEC. This was a nice little jab by these writers directed at John Calipari. By tabbing the Cats as the favorite, the media has guaranteed that if they fall short, Calipari will be on the hot seat at year’s end. How impatient are Kentucky fans? Consider: UK’s football team failed to win the SEC this year, and Cat fans are ready to run Joker Phillips out of town. They also failed to win the SEC in basketball in 2007 and 2009, and both times, the Kentucky coach was gone at season’s end. Calipari isn’t immune from these pressures, either. In 2011, UK failed to win the SEC and the only thing that placated the Big Blue Faithful was a run to the Final Four. Would Calipari have been given the boot had they not made it to Houston that year? Luckily for Coach Cal, we’ll never know. So this is basically a lose-lose for Calipari. Either Kentucky wins the SEC, and he is criticized for only meeting the bare minimum expectations, or they fall short, and he’s looking for a new job. Well played, scribes. Well played indeed.

*Sweet Emotion: The NCAA announced last week that freshman Nerlens Noel has been cleared to play. This does not bode well for Kentucky. When reached for comment, an NCAA spokesman confirmed that Noel is cleared “for now,” and that circumstances could theoretically change in the future. Similarly, he refused to promise that Noel would play every game this season. For example, if Noel robbed a train, his eligibility could be in jeopardy. Likewise, the spokesman refused to guarantee that Noel wouldn’t miss any time due to injury. And when asked to vouch with 100% certitude that Noel wouldn’t be abducted by aliens right before the NCAA Tournament, the spokesman hung up. Was he trying to send a message? Buckle up, Cat fans. This figures to be a bumpy ride.

*On this date: On this date in 1985, little Petey Thamel was named “Hall Monitor of the Month” at Millard Fillmore Elementary in Great Neck, NY, after issuing a record 437 citations in only 21 school days.

Article written by Not Jerry Tipton

24 Comments for Not Jerry Tipton’s Friday Basketball Notebook



  1. oldcatdog
    12:06 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    I am confused??



  2. Yeah right...
    12:11 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    How the hell can Tipton say Louisville will win the next ten years? We have the best recruiting class ever next year, we might lose this year definitely not next year. His logic makes no sense which is probably why he’s writing on this site and not LHL.



  3. Linda Taylor
    12:12 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    1 – Not Jerry Tipton is a parody of Lexington Herald Leader sportswriter Jerry Tipton who is known for his negative coverage of UK basketball.



  4. Matt Jones
    12:13 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    That’s exactly right NJT. It’s exactly right #1. I’m exactly right about Wiggins having an open recruitment….(5 months from now) That’s exactly right that he was always coming to UK. That’s exactly right.



  5. Capt
    12:17 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Brilliant!



  6. Paul
    12:18 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Funniest one in a long time. Still laughing. Love it.



  7. symphonist41169
    12:23 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    LOVE these posts, almost as much as I love seeing how many ignorant people don’t know the definition of “irony” and “tongue-in-cheek”. Well done!!



  8. TheNewOriginal
    12:23 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Excellent, as always. Very creative on all three points.



  9. Big Blue B-Rad
    12:24 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    7) Or how many people don’t notice the NOT in front of Jerry Tipton’s name. Job well done Ms. Tyler Thompson! Job well done!



  10. rent it
    12:24 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    solid effort … i bet Thamel still has that certificate hanging framed in his office



  11. Manbearpig
    12:28 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Ah prob one of the best “on this date” in a while.



  12. UKBlue1!
    12:28 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    ” those who doubt Pitino will still be coaching Louisville in 10 years, remember this: If Rick Pitino is known for anything, it’s his ability to last for a long, long time.” Great! Its better than reading the real Tipton.



  13. Walter Sobchak
    12:32 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    If NJT is still posting on here 10 years from now, there will STILL be people who don’t get it.



  14. poot
    12:40 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    pete thamel reference was freaking good. Love it, by far the best post of the week is NJT.



  15. Al's IndiCats
    12:44 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Always good for a laugh NJT, both in the column and the comment section.



  16. Mike S
    1:10 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    All Hail NJT!!! May this never, ever end. Perfection.



  17. FunkManMiser
    1:43 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    I laughed at every single part this week. As others have said, Well Done. Look forward to this column every Friday.



  18. LOL
    1:56 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    “And for those who doubt Pitino will still be coaching Louisville in 10 years, remember this: If Rick Pitino is known for anything, it’s his ability to last for a long, long time.”

    LOL



  19. GapToothDanny
    2:27 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    good one! Statistics never lie, at least 73% of the time.
    Little Petey Thamel: I can imagine a prominent role in “Ferris Bueller’s Next Day Off” played by an irritating freckle-faced & redheaded kid (braces required). Alas, John Hughes isn’t going to be involved.



  20. Carl
    2:33 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Well done NJT, well done indeed.



  21. NJTfanboy
    3:18 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    twisted, perverse, convoluted, ironic, sardonic, cynical, mocking, satirical, caustic, wry. oops.. my thesaurus ran out of words. who are you, really?



  22. Jughead
    4:50 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    NJT quiere Prick Latino mucho.



  23. Jughead
    4:51 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Y, NJT tiene huevos pocitos–Prick Latino digame.



  24. Steven T.
    6:04 pm October 26, 2012 Permalink

    Aerosmith.