We are gathered here today to preview tomorrow’s loss by the East Tennessee State Buccaneers. Though their time in the Big Dance will be short-lived, these men will never be forgotten. They will leave behind an Atlantic Sun Championship and many cameos in John Wall highlight reels and posters.
#3 Justin Tubbs, G
(11.8 ppg, 3.8 rpg)
Tubbs is a junior transfer from Alabama where he was All-Academic SEC in 2007-2008. As a freshman in Tuscaloosa, he scored nine points in 20 minutes in the win over #18 Kentucky. The following year, he went 0-1 from the field in 20 minutes in Alabama’s losing effort against the Cats. Tomorrow, Tubbs will face his third Kentucky coach. I just wonder if he’s aware how different this Kentucky team is from the last one he saw. I guess he’ll know when he sees John Wall and Demarcus Cousins and the bench doesn’t smell like wine coolers.
#11 Jocolby Davis, G
2.9 ppg, 2.4 apg
Jocolby Davis is another transfer guard for ETSU. The fifth-year senior spent his first two years at Georgia Perimeter , which, apparently, is a school and not the Georgia Border Patrol. Last season, he sat out as a medical redshirt due to a wrist injury. The injury was sustained while getting car-jacked in Atlanta. True story.
#30 Micah Williams, G
12.5 ppg, 3.1 rpg
Micah “Katt” Williams is a stand-up comedian from Cincinnati best known for his Pimp Chronicles and his role as “Money Mike” in Friday After Next. The five-foot-five comedian isn’t the same Micah Williams that plays for ETSU, but it would be a very fun game to watch if that were the case. “Tink-tink-tink-tink”
#13 Tommy Hubbard, F
14.1 ppg, 8.3 ppg
Tommy Hubbard is a 6’4 junior out of Boston, Mass. I Google’d his name to find out more but apparently the ETSU star isn’t as popular as Tom Hubbard’s Practical Penis Enlargement. Not all was lost though, I got a head start on Christmas shopping for my fellow KSR bloggers.
#41 Isiah Brown, F
7.6 ppg, 5.7 rpg
Isiah Brown wants absolutely nothing to do with Demarcus Cousins. May God have mercy on his soul.