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University of Kentucky Basketball, Football, and Recruiting news brought to you in the most ridiculous manner possible.

KSR presents: The NCAA Tournament Drinking Game

drinking games

 

This is going to be a weird couple of weeks. For the second time in my true Kentucky fan hood (1992-now), the Cats are nowhere to be found in the NCAA field. Making matters worse, we have already seen our last Kentucky game of the season. Thankfully, we have a lot to look forward to next year. But in the meantime, we have to sit back and watch as another team takes over our seat as the kings of college basketball. Making that situation worse is the fact our biggest rivals are heavy favorites to be the ones cutting down the nets (although Indiana will cut down nets win or lose).  To get us through the rest of March and early April, I (along with some helpful suggestions from friends) created a NCAA Tournament drinking game to help ease the pain of our Cats being non existent in the bracket. As always, we here at KSR encourage you to drink responsibly and make good decisions.

 

In addition to the rules in the photo…

 

Take a Drink:

 

*Anytime you hear the CBS tournament theme music.

*If you hear any Bill Raftery-isms: “A little kiss,” “ManTAman,” “ONIONS!!”, “The blow by,” “Valentine,” or “A little lingerie on the deck!”

*If Jim Nantz says “Hello Friends” or gives what my friend Allison describes as a pregnant pause (trying to rise above the moment with a meaningful moment of silence). When he delivers his corny pre-planned champion declaration at the end of the title game, finish your drink because we are no longer the champs. At least not for 12 more months.

*If you ever think “Man, I miss Gus Johnson” when some guy that hasn’t seen a college game all season is calling a game in a terrible fashion.

*If an 11 seed of higher is winning, drink. If they win, play a game we call “lose it” (finish your drink.)

*If you are in a bracket pool with a girl who filled out her bracket based on what colors a team wears, drink. Because you will lose to that girl.

*If Butler or VCU are mentioned as Cinderellas.

*If they talk about how Brad Stevens and Shaka Smart have turned down bigger jobs to stay at their school or mention VCU’s “Havoc” style of play.

*If Charles Barkley is in a commercial or mispronounces a player, coach, or school’s name.

*If a team you picked loses.

*Anytime Kentucky is mentioned in regards to winning last year, struggling this year, or the recruiting class they have coming in next year.

*If Coach Cal makes an appearance as a guest studio analyst.

*If a team (*cough* Wisconsin *cough*) wins a game by scoring less than 50 points.

*A shot of your choice if a 16 seed beats a 1 seed. The number of shots taken shall be determined by the amount of points the 16 seed wins by. (Go Tops!)

*When they refer to the Thursday/Friday games as the “2nd round.” This drives me crazier than Billy Gillispie’s driver at 2:00 a.m. leaving the golf course.

*If someone mentions that “Tom Izzo is great in March.”

*If Marshall Henderson makes you tweet “I really like Marshall Henderson.”

*If someone asks you “What channel is TruTV?”

*If a block/charge is blatantly missed. Terminate use of this rule after the first slate of games Thursday.

*If a Duke player flops.

*(speaking of Duke…) If they show Seth Curry’s Mom in the crowd. Additionally, don’t stand up for a while.

*If they mention the toughness of the Midwest region.

*If the tournament is referred to as “The Big Dance.”

*If Peyton Siva’s Dad is shown. If he is in his tight jersey, drink twice.

*If you see the “Tubby glare.”

*Anytime you see a tweet that says something to the effect of “Dangit *insert team name*! Now my bracket is busted!” Those people are the worst. Brackets are like butt holes. Or something like that.

*If Mrs. Tyler tweets about her Wildcats from Davidson.

 

Do a waterfall throughout the entirety of “One Shining Moment.”

 

Happy brackets, everyone.

 

@AFlenerKSR

 

Article written by Aaron Flener

John, I was first team All-State. I can put the ball anywhere I want to. I'll make it rain out here.

28 Comments for KSR presents: The NCAA Tournament Drinking Game



  1. nkycat
    9:50 pm March 20, 2013 Permalink

    Why is there a bottle of Jack Daniels on a Kentucky fan site?



  2. Amberbock
    9:54 pm March 20, 2013 Permalink

    Lol, any time duke plays, it looks as though I may end up with alcohol poisoning. *flop*



  3. NEED THAT HAT...
    9:57 pm March 20, 2013 Permalink

    If You know where I can get the hat that Julius Randle is wearing when he chose to play for Kentucky please post here the location…

    I noticed another recruit this year had it on when he selected UK. I’m wondering if Cal is handing a limited production run of rare hats out to these guys.

    To me it’s clearly the best looking Kentucky hat I’ve seen in years.

    Thanks for any help



  4. w
    9:59 pm March 20, 2013 Permalink

    What is Kyle WItjers status???



  5. DB11
    9:59 pm March 20, 2013 Permalink

    My buddies and I are taking shots whenever Duke, Louisville, Indiana, Florida, or Ohio State loses.



  6. AgreeWith1
    10:01 pm March 20, 2013 Permalink

    Take the Tenn. whiskey down replace with ky bourbon…… Matt Jones probably drinks Zima though!



  7. Tim
    10:02 pm March 20, 2013 Permalink

    I bought that same hat at an outlet mall near Chicago. I thought it was pretty cool so picked it up.



  8. Mike
    10:10 pm March 20, 2013 Permalink

    4. w…D.O.A.



  9. oldblue
    10:12 pm March 20, 2013 Permalink

    Who cares were not playing.



  10. Han
    10:13 pm March 20, 2013 Permalink

    Great day with the commit of Julius Randle.

    Hadn’t seen this Wiggins dunk before. Look how high he gets on the lob: http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=4fIbFejM5xM#t=69s



  11. That'sExactlyRight
    10:15 pm March 20, 2013 Permalink

    That Laettner picture should only be used for urinal cakes! Also, any Kentucky bourbon picture would be better than Jack Daniels!



  12. RahRah
    10:16 pm March 20, 2013 Permalink

    Haha, I don’t drink but these are great! Peyton Siva’s dad in a sleeveless jersey, lol.
    I’m sitting out One Shining Moment however. Or I might flip in the tape of last year.



  13. Linda Taylor
    10:17 pm March 20, 2013 Permalink

    The Charles Barkley line alone would be enough to get everyone drunk in half an hour even faster on the Duke players flopping.



  14. Bob the Replier
    10:18 pm March 20, 2013 Permalink

    I love it when Gus Johnson covers any sport! He could make a snail race sound more exciting than a deadheat in the Kentucky Derby.



  15. Fan of Camelot
    10:22 pm March 20, 2013 Permalink

    Count me in!!!



  16. Han
    10:23 pm March 20, 2013 Permalink

    Bunch of Randle vids listed at RR. The BallIsLife one is ridiculous:
    http://kentucky.rivals.com/showmsg.asp?fid=1383&tid=186319225&mid=186319225&sid=888&style=2



  17. Mike's Mom
    10:43 pm March 20, 2013 Permalink

    Mike – Another negative comment. Of the 233 post Mike has made in the past 7 days. None, absolutely none had been a postive quote. He is a Card’s fan. I know Mike from a mutual friend who told me he posts constantly on these boards.

    Mike is in his 30’s and lives off Dixie Highway (yea, I know, surprise surprise). For every negative post you make Mike, I will continue to expose your hater self.

    Go to the Card’s forum and stay. You’ve been exposed.



  18. RealCatsFan
    10:45 pm March 20, 2013 Permalink

    10, I have seen a couple of them where I swear he gets his chin above the rim. Boy has hops.



  19. Bluebee
    10:56 pm March 20, 2013 Permalink

    Thanks 16, this kid is a hoss who plays through contact. There will be no need for Cal to teach passion or desire to this Cat. He will be special!



  20. seriously
    11:01 pm March 20, 2013 Permalink

    Sigh…nothing like coming to my fav UK site and seeing the Laettner photo. Aaron, when you aren’t doing the Bachelor blog do you secretly work for CBS?



  21. The King
    12:01 am March 21, 2013 Permalink

    Holy cow, Chester’s call just got played on MSNBC.



  22. Harlan
    5:41 am March 21, 2013 Permalink

    KSR is the one place I thought I was safe from seeing that picture….why is that on here?



  23. Bill Brasky
    8:07 am March 21, 2013 Permalink

    I cannot believe you had the gall to post that laettner picture.



  24. Austin Monnett
    8:30 am March 21, 2013 Permalink

    I seriously laughed out loud on the rule about Siva’s dad. I remember last year they showed him 30 times a game getting overemotional at every point scored.



  25. just sayin
    10:22 am March 21, 2013 Permalink

    I have printed this drinking game off instead of a bracket. thanks KSR! I will be watching the NCAA tournament now.



  26. UK STUDent
    11:35 am March 21, 2013 Permalink

    IN GODS NAME, WHY WOULD YOU LET THIS PERSON POST? POSTING THIS CHEESY DRINKING GAME IS POOR; THEN BEING DUMB ENOUGH TO POST THE laettner PICTURE, NOT TO MENTION THE HORRIBLE REFRENCE OF A PICTURE FOR THE DRINKING GAME (BEAM). THIS IS JUST PLAIN PISS POOR.



  27. Tiger
    1:20 pm March 21, 2013 Permalink

    Take a drink every time you see a commercial for “The Masters: Unlike any other”



  28. CATSfan
    2:29 pm March 21, 2013 Permalink

    *A shot of your choice if a 16 seed beats a 1 seed. The number of shots taken shall be determined by the amount of points the 16 seed wins by. (Go Tops!)* YES! Go Tops!!!! The only Kentucky team in the NCAA tourney that will have my full love and support.