Just because I didn’t post yesterday, don’t think I don’t hate Louisville. It’s a job requirement here.
When I joined KSR, Matt sat me down. Here’s how our conversation went:
Matt: Aaron, we’d love to have you, but I need to know if you have hate in your heart for Louisville.
Me: Of course I do.
Matt: If you have hate in your heart, you must let it out.
Me: Yes sir.
After that stirring conversation, I began to think about my hatred for Louisville. Where did it come from? Was it just one thing about them? Was it many things?
…Yep, it was many things.
How much do I hate Louisville? Let me count the ways.
I hate red.
I hate canadian whiskey.
I hate Thunder over Louisville.
I hate Freedom Hall.
I hate “The Boys.”
I hate Johnny Unitas.
I hate birds.
I hate the word “yum.”
I hate Darrell Griffith.
I hate Tom Jurich.
I hate the Watterson.
I hate the Astro Turf in Cardinal Stadium.
I hate what brown can do for me.
I hate baseball bats.
I hate Drew Franklin’s apartment complex.
I hate Samaki Walker.
I hate the cab situation at Derby.
I hate thinly manicured facial hair.
I hate Michael Bush.
I hate the guy who yelled at Ryan Lemond in the parking lot at Roosters.
I hate the phrase “point blank period.”
I hate underground sex clubs.
I hate line 4 in the radio studio.
I hate Schnellenburger.
I hate King Louis.
I hate Jefferson County.
I hate Slugger Field.
I hate(d) Kentucky Kingdom.
I hate Deion Branch.
I hate the Science Center.
I hate the Orange Bowl.
I hate the Louisville Zoo.
I hate 4th Street Live.
I hate the Ohio River.
I hate Rick Pitino.
I just REALLY HATE LOUISVILLE. I can’t stress that enough.
Hate Louisville yesterday, Hate Louisville today, Hate Louisville forever. Go Cats.