The reason for the season.
No, it’s college football.
And really, Kinsella, how could you get heaven and Iowa mixed up? Why would (insert higher power of your choice) create an afterlife that combined never-ending corn fields and freezing cold northern winds—with not so much as a hill to block them? Sure, it’s great playing baseball with those cheaters during the summer, but winter will come soon. Then what? Plus, and this is just a feeling I have, Iowa seems buggy.
Anyway, college football triumphantly returns tonight, and ESPN has you covered. Vandy (nerds) and Miami (OH) kickoff at 7:30 on ESPNU, with South Kak-a-lak and NC State at 8 on ESPN, and Oregon State at Stanford at 9 on ESPN2. Nothing too awesome, but we get to see a couple of opponents in action. Plus, it’s DIVISION ONE FOOTBALL!!!
You can also catch Wake Forest playing at Baylor on FSN (9PM).
My suggestion to you is to get obscenely and irresponsibly drunk for this entire weekend. I know that’s my plan. Starting…now.