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University of Kentucky Basketball, Football, and Recruiting news brought to you in the most ridiculous manner possible.

Hulkamania’s Wednesday News and Views

Go ahead.  Cue it up.  Let’s hear it.  Yep, you know what that sound means.  It’s not just an average Wednesday around here, folks.  It’s the 57th birthday of Hulk Hogan, who entered this world in 1953 as Terry Gene Bolea and the first baby to every leg drop the doctor while still attached to the umbilical cord.  For those of us in our late 20s and older, Hogan was as big as it got both literally and figuratively during our youth and, in some form or fashion, he’s remained relevant and in the limelight throughout our lives.  Back then, we were kids and Hogan’s insistance on being anythign you wanted to be through hard work, honesty and loyalty represented what we knew to be the American Dream.  Now, as adults, watching his spoiled kids and his skank of an ex-wife fleece him out of every penny he spent his whole life beating himself up for presents us with a different, yet not necessarily inaccurate ,picture of the American Dream.  And I’m not talking about the “American Dream” Dusty Rhodes either, who I’m pretty sure is far worse off than Hogan.  I saw him wrestling in the parking lot of a car dealership in front of 20 people last year while I was waiting at a stop light.  That can’t be a good thing.  Of course, that has anything to do with Hulk Hogan’s birthday and if anyone is going to steal his thunder, it’s going to be the Iron Sheik, who is unavailable.  Anyway, over the past 30 years, Hogan has won our hearts with thrilling matches and memorable movies (Suburban Commando anyone?) and by being, along with biker gangs and their leather, metal studs and chaps, the only person who can make what one might consider traditionally homosexual clothing appear masculine and manly.  For that alone, the Hulkster deserves your admiration and respect.  Hulk, happy birthday, brother.  Save me a seat at Forlini’s.

Now onto some UK news…

 – The big news breaking late on Tuesday was that five-star in-stater Chane Behanan would visit Lexington on Wednesday, unofficially taking in all things blue and white after making the long drive we’ve all regrettably traveled from Bowling Green to Lexington, though he hopefully won’t be nearly a hung over.  Behanan, who really burst into the national spotlight this summer, does not hold an offer form UK, according to Rivals.  However, the 6’6″ 250 Bowling Green Purple has become more of a target as time has passed and Kentucky could end up being a very prominent player in his recruitment.  He told Jody Demling that he believes the UK coaches want to talk to him about a scholarship offer when he comes to campus.

 – Seemingly right on cue, the world’s largest leprechaun, Johnny O’Bryant, trimmed his list to seven schools and Kentucky did not make a list.  The Cats joined Kansas and Georgetown as the departed teams while there was still gold at the end of the rainbow on the Miami, Maryland, Ole Miss, Mississippi State, Georgia Tech, Alabama and LSU campuses.

 – One of the great mysteries in the storied history of Kentucky Sports Radio is the disappearance of Turkey Hunter’s Haiti basketball jersey which was to be auctioned off in the Hoops for Haiti event.  I think we might have a suspect.  Lexington police arrested a former Cat Fan-AtticHoops employee for stealing the credit card info of Hoops for Haiti donorsand using them on the impressive spread of loan payments, his water bill, clothes from Dick’s and movie tickets from Cinemark.  If your info was stolen, you’ll be getting a letter.  If your Team Haiti jersey was stolen, you’re still getting screwed.  Where is the justice??? 

 – On a day where Randall Cobb was named as a Biletnikoff Award candidate, Joker Phillips was impressed with Chris Matthews.  Phillips told Cat Scratches (full story here) that the senior wideout brought intensity on a hot day and then spoke about position battles, Turtle Allen’s knack for crushing linebackers and the special appearance from the men’s basketball coach. 

 – In football recruiting news, weekend visitor Elliot Porter is rumored to be visiting Texas A&M at the moment.  This might be true.  It might not be.  But, I can tell you with 100% certainty that it is rumored.

 – As a motivational ploy, Charlie Strong announced that Louisville football will not take a team pictureunles they make a bowl.  However, individual photos will still be available through the Jefferson County Sheriff’s Office. 

 – Finally, a big congrats to Tim Couch, who signed with Fox Sports to be a color analyst for college football this season.  According to the greatness that is Oscar Combs, he will handle two UK games early in the year and also be a part of Fox Sports’ SEC weekly television program that will air mid-week.  I love you, Timmy.

That’s it for now.  Say your prayers and eat your vitamins.  And make sure you stick around.  See you in a few…

Article written by Thomas Beisner