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University of Kentucky Basketball, Football, and Recruiting news brought to you in the most ridiculous manner possible.

Email concerning a Tubby termination

I received an email suggesting that a reader would like to represent Tubby if he ever sued Kentucky for wrongful termination (a lot would obviously have to happen for that to take place.) Here was the questioning:

I would LOVE to be Tubby’s lawyer in a hypothetical Wrongful Termination lawsuit. Imagine it going something like this:

Me – Why was Mr Smith terminated from his contract?

UK – Mr Smith did not live up to UK standards.

Me – What standards are those?

UK – We have the #1 W-L record of all-time.

Me – What is your W-L record?

UK – We have won 1915 games out of 2503 for 76.5% W-L record.

Me – Mr Smith is 229-62 for 78.7% W-L record at UK.

UK – Umm, yeah, but he didn’t live up to our NCAA tournament standards.

Me – What is your W-L record in NCAA tournament play?

UK – We are 98-42 (70%) in NCAA tournament games.

Me – Mr Smith is 21-7 (75%) in NCAA tournament games at UK.

UK – Yeah, well, but it’s easier to win NCAA games since Coach Rupp retired in 1972.

Me – What is your NCAA W-L record since 1973 then?

UK – We are 68-24 (73.9%) in that timeframe.

Me – I just told you that Mr Smith has won 75% of his NCAA games at UK.

UK – Yeah, but we expect championships at UK.

Me – How many championships have you won?

UK – We have won 7 NCAA championships (in 57 years since the NCAA tournament began).

Me – That’s 1 NCAA title about every 8 years then.

UK – Yessir, that’s right!

Me – Mr Smith has won 1 NCAA title in his 8 years at UK.

UK – Umm, yeah, but UK has won or shared (about) 45 SEC titles in (about) 75 years of conference play.

Me – That’s 60% of the time, you win or share the SEC title then.

UK – Yessir, that’s right!

Me – Mr Smith has won or shared 5 SEC titles in his 8 years at UK, or just about 62% of the time.

UK – Umm, well, umm…

Me – I rest my case, your honor.

(5 minutes later)…

Judge – Mr (jury) foreman, have you reached a verdict?

Jury – Yes, your honor, we have.

Judge – What say ye then?

Jury – We find in favor of Mr Smith!

Article written by Matt Jones