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University of Kentucky Basketball, Football, and Recruiting news brought to you in the most ridiculous manner possible.

Dear Mrs. Tyler, Vol. 1

DearMrsTyler

I’m starting an advice column for KSR readers to help you solve the Big Blue dilemmas in your life, from which basketball roadtrip to take this season, to how many UK shirts you should have in your rotation, and anything in between. Fighting with a UofL fan at work? I’ll help you coming up with a solution. Are you a diehard UK fan living in Volunteer territory? Let us help you make it through.

Big, small, we’ll cover it all. Submit questions via email or Twitter (use the hashtag #DearMrsTyler).

ZaJortney Barker writes: “Will I be able to dust off my three goggles next season with this highly ranked Wildcat squad?”

Dear ZaJortney,

Most definitely. With Kyle, Aaron Harrison, James Young and others, ’tis the season for three goggling. I hope you can remember how after all this time.

Kelly Harper writes, “Dear Mrs. Tyler: Thanksgiving Weekend – How do you work UK vs UT game in Lex on Sat with UK BB in NYC on Sun?”

Dear Kelly,

This is a tough one, but not impossible. Make sure you arrange your Thanksgiving plans with your family, your spouse/significant other’s family, etc. for Thursday and Friday so that the weekend is free and clear of holiday family drama. Brave the chilly Commonwealth parking lots for a tailgate on Saturday, complete with Thanksgiving leftovers before watching Kentucky beat Tennessee for the second time in three years.

If the UK/UT game is an early game, there will still be time to catch a flight to NYC, but if it’s a late game, you can get an early flight on Sunday (United has one that leaves at 8 a.m. that will get you to Newark at 1 pm with a quick stop in Chicago). If you can’t afford a flight, cram your family or friends into a car and make a roadtrip out of it. Download a week’s worth of KSR podcasts to keep everyone entertained while you drive through the night. If you’re not driving, this also might be a good time to install SnapChat and Vine to your smartphone, or finally watch “Game of Thrones.” Seriously, the Red Wedding was f’d up.

Once in New York, go straight to Jack Demsey’s, where Drew Franklin will serve you a shot of Maker’s and you can jump on the shuttle bus to the Barclays Center. Enjoy the game and take an extra day off work to enjoy the city.

Again, it’ll be a packed weekend, but if you want to see the Cats play in Brooklyn, you can totally do it with the right planning. This year will be special and is worth the extra effort. YOLO, sleep when you’re dead, etc.

Orange Leaf Lover writes, “Dear Mrs. Tyler: How do I stop people from sending stuff to my house? I appreciate their support, but these people are crazy!”

Dear Orange Leaf Lover,

That has to be annoying. Maybe this is a case for the mean and nimble one?

“Make me a sandwich” writes:

Screen shot 2013-06-06 at 1.30.32 PM

I’ve been getting a lot of sandwich requests lately! Because I simply can’t fulfill them all, I put together some recipes so you guys can make them on your own. It’s really quite easy:

BLT (Bacon Lettuce Tomato)

2 slices of bread
4 pieces of bacon
2 pieces of lettuce
2 slices of tomato
1 tbsp mayonnaise

Cook bacon in a frying pan and, spread mayo on bread and assemble ingredients. Toasting bread is optional.

PBJ (Peanut Butter and Jelly)

2 slices of bread
2 tbsp peanut butter
2 tbs jelly

Spread peanut butter on one slice of bread and jelly on the other. Put together. Cut crusts off if so desired.

I hope this helps.

xoxo,
Mrs. Tyler

Article written by Mrs. Tyler Thompson

No, I will not make you a sandwich, but you can follow me on Twitter @MrsTylerKSR or email me.

34 Comments for Dear Mrs. Tyler, Vol. 1



  1. DTuck
    5:10 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    I must disagree vehemently with the PBJ technique. I believe it is far better to spread the peanut butter on one slice and then spread the jelly on top of the peanut butter. Finally, you can cover with the plain slice. Stick to sportswriting Mrs. TT.



  2. bluemanchew
    5:12 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    how can i get into this dear mrs TT thing? this sounds like fun, especially since i have been wishing and hoping i could of photo bombed your website picture thats on the site. also you look nice in a blue t shirt. that sure does sound like a good samich



  3. bluemanchew
    5:14 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    p.s. you gave me xoxo, back at ya



  4. yesterday's wine
    5:14 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    Way to go TT, good post and the sandwich instructions were a bonus.



  5. FlySoup
    5:16 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    Alternate: spread the PB on BOTH sides and then jelly in the middle so the bread doesn’t get soggy. Toasting the bread is optional (and delicious) for PB&J as well



  6. Another Alternate Technique
    5:21 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    Raid a nearby high school. The desired booty? Uncrustables.



  7. Another Alternate Technique
    5:24 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    NOTE: If caught, avoid expressing interest in finding “booty.”



  8. Ridge Runner
    5:25 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    Excellent Ms T! I sent ya one earlier this wk and hope ya got it.



  9. MrG
    5:26 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    To heck with the “make me a sandwich” bums! I think you’re awesome and I enjoy your writing;-)
    MrG



  10. Smiley Pete
    5:31 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    No no no, you’re not using enough peanut butter or jelly. Also, add a little bit of honey in the middle and toast the bread. Now you’re got a good PB&J



  11. TampaCat
    5:39 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    Classic Post Mrs. TT………Loved it!



  12. PBJ
    5:45 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    PBJ’s are a lot better if they are toasted…just sayin’.



  13. Let Them Haters Have It
    6:02 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    Great post TT, your work is very much appreciated by the BBN. We all know “Make Me a Sandwich” wouldn’t say those words in person or behind the anonymity of his computer screen. Well done



  14. Let Them Haters Have It
    6:06 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    **without the anonymity of his computer screen



  15. trying something new
    6:13 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    i have never in my life had a PB&J on toasted bread … i will do so very soon



  16. cracka
    6:25 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    only 4 pieces of bacon? very disappointing! you make sammiches like a girl! I recommend 6-8 pieces at least … Mmmmmm BACON!!!



  17. dave
    6:57 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    well, in the guys defense were you actually summarizing something stoops had said almost a month before? b/c, ya know, the guy wouldnt be way off in his critique



  18. mountain man
    7:33 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    Take the spoonfuls of PB and mix with the jelly. Stir well. spred on bread, then dribble some honey on the Pb and jelly. Do NOT toast the bread. enjoy



  19. zane
    7:40 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    The brownies are burning..get back in the kitchen



  20. Mass Confusion
    7:55 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    ahh TT’s finally taking my advice. Less words more sandwiches.



  21. Chad
    8:07 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    #18 to address your name… how would you feel if someone said that your mother, sister, or girlfriend/boyfriend? Some people have zero class at least four examples of it here.



  22. Ridge Runner
    8:55 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    23, I hear ya but some of this stuff is beyond no class. It’s plain mean and rude.



  23. Chad's mother's Fake Boobs and Rat Face
    9:00 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    #23 why don’t you go down to the hardware store and buy a pair of pliers and pull that stick out of your a$$??



  24. Chad
    9:12 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    #25 Why don’t you use that stick to beat some sense into yourself



  25. TT Boy
    9:19 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    18 is gay. Tyler is a sexy talented young lady.



  26. DLN
    9:32 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    Nice.

    Oh, and strawberry jam for the win.



  27. DC Cat
    9:40 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    18 and 26 – you guys are pathetic. Don’t like it, don’t read it! Why the need to be a$$holes?! My guess is that you also berate the players or recruits who pick different schools via twitter.



  28. Jerns
    10:04 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    This just inspired me to make a pb&j.. to find out I didnt have any milk. *sigh*



  29. HeyDickface
    10:21 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    26 you are a douche and I’d gladly say it to your douchey face.



  30. Chad
    11:34 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    #28 and 29 if your responses made sense I may actually take offense to them but since you are obviously in middle school and don’t know good English or rebuttals then I didn’t. Nice try though! You get a gold star on your next report.



  31. BBNinWI
    11:44 pm June 7, 2013 Permalink

    TT is a fine writer. It’s summer there is absolutely nothing to write about at least shes not BTI



  32. UK_JB
    7:47 am June 8, 2013 Permalink

    TT… You can write very well and I bet you are a great cook. Good combo!



  33. Me
    9:15 am June 8, 2013 Permalink

    Very disappointed the sandwich run down didn’t end with “and insert the whole thing in your rectum.”

    Mrs. T missed a grand opportunity to light all you haters up…



  34. Buckets
    5:59 pm June 8, 2013 Permalink

    What a d-bag. I rather enjoy Mrs. TT’s writing. Definitely my third favorite KSR writer behind Matt and Drew.