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University of Kentucky Basketball, Football, and Recruiting news brought to you in the most ridiculous manner possible.

College Football’s Saturday News and Views

“Wow, check out the size of #CardNation, that’s gotta be at LEAST 50 sq. miles!”


There are plenty of things that could be celebrated Saturday. First of all, it’s Saturday, which means no work, and in most cases, day drinking. A select few people also may point out that Saturday marks the 57th birthday of Tae-Bo legend Billy Blanks, who’s 45 minute workout cassette still carries on a lonely existence in my parents’ basement. Our fearless leader, Matt Jones might celebrate what would’ve been the 79th birthday of country music legend Harold Lloyd Jenkins, more affectionately known by his stage name Conway Twitty. The rest of us however, know that College Football will be the cause of our celebration, and celebrate we will. We made it, folks. So long to the monotonous dog days of summer, which are polluted with crazy idea that a fan catching a foul ball and not spilling his beer is worthy of the #1 play on SportsCenter. Football is back, and Saturday’s for me become 150% less productive until January. Life is good. 

**Other’s Receiving Votes for KSR Night Post Dedication: Phil Fulmer (52nd birthday), “Dr. Phil” McGraw (also 52nd birthday), Germany (Invasion of Poland, 1939) 

 First off, the big news of the day leaving Lexington (literally) came from former Xavier Musketeer Dezmine Wells, who cut Kentucky from his list of potential transfer destinations after visiting campus the past couple of days. the sophomore guard, who averaged 9.8ppg last season for Xavier is still scheduled to visit Memphis and Maryland, and earlier today added Oregon to his list of upcoming visits. Wells will decide on Tuesday between the 3 schools. Closing the book on this brief recruitment, I had thought since the day I heard of his expulsion from Xavier that he could’ve fit in greatly this year as a backup at the 1/2 for Kentucky, but with the long shot odds of him being eligible this year and the monster class UK looks to have in 2013, the decision may have been the best one for both parties. At least he’s not going to Louisville. 

 Speaking of the Cardinals, T-Minus 40 hours until Louisville’s undefeated season ends. I’m also really liking the fact that I can count down by hours now, as opposed to days and weeks.


 Tickets for the Alumni Basketball Game on September 15th went on sale this morning at 10am. The game will be played at 2pm before the kickoff of UK’s game against Western Kentucky later that evening. With all the proceeds going to charity, don’t lie to yourself about having more important things to do and help save lives by watching your favorite ‘Cats of the last decade duke it out on the court. Also, you wouldn’t want to miss the chance of seeing an Antoine Walker shimmy after draining a 30-foot jumper over Matt, or Wayne “Burner” Turner putting some rich Kentucky executive on skates, would you? All seats are reserved and priced at $100 (premium lower level), $40 (lower level) and $20 (upper level). Tickets can be purchased only at the Rupp Arena box office, online at, at any Ticketmaster Outlet or by phone at 1-800-745-3000. There is a four-ticket limit per person. Online orders and phone orders will have additional fees attached.

 In what may be the most asinine move by not only the NCAA, but any sport governing body in quite some time, the NCAA cleared the University of North Carolina of any wrongdoing after investigating an alleged (and I use that term loosely) academic scandal involving a decade’s worth of Football and Basketball athletes. In summary, if you majored in the Afro-American studies program at UNC, you were going to be eligible to play varsity sports. Not even the transcript of former UNC 2-sport star Julius Peppers, which showed that even with “fake classes” to boost his GPA, Peppers still could never raise his GPA above a 1.95, but somehow never lost eligiblity, hmmm. So in summary, either the NCAA is turning a blind eye to an obvious issue, or the NCAA’s investigative committee has less manpower than the 4-second Google search I just used to type this paragraph.

 Billy Gillispie is still doing Billy Gillispie things, conditioning top-level athletes by force-feeding them Pop-Tarts and whatnot, and it has landed him in hot water in Lubbock. Some of the players on the team met with the Athletic Director the past couple of days, stating their displeasure with the treatment they have received from the head coach, ranging from verbal abuse, to 8-hour Saturday practices which are double the amount of time allowed by the NCAA. In an unrelated incident, Gillispie was admitted to the hospital early Friday for undisclosed reasons, but was in stable condition. No matter how much Kentucky fans hated his coaching, I’m sure we can all agree that we hope he’s back to drinking Dr. Pepper’s in no time.

 Tennessee is currently up 32-21 on NC State with 6:12 to go in the 4th Quarter. Which means we only have about 15 minutes to bask in Tennessee’s 1-game losing streak to end last season.


It’s time for me to get rested for another glorious Saturday of College Football tomorrow, I’ll be back around 4:30 tomorrow evening to  tell you more things you wanna know about Kentucky sports. When I look for College Football coverage I ask myself 2 questions: 1. Does this person love America? and 2. Does this person wear shirts? If you answer “yes” to to Question 1 “hell no” to Question 2, you’re alright by me. That’s why for in-depth coverage of Sunday’s Governor’s Cup QB battle, I’ll leave you guys with these wise words from a man who calls himself “The Kentucky Cooter”.





Article written by Will Totten

Born in Indiana and raised in Louisville, I am the unlikeliest UK fan.

34 Comments for College Football’s Saturday News and Views

  1. Mr G
    11:16 pm August 31, 2012 Permalink

    I love this guy! He reminds me of all my country cousins in Clay and Laurel counties! That’s my roots and I’m dang proud of ’em!

  2. Run Fat Boy Run
    11:23 pm August 31, 2012 Permalink

    That was solid gold. Just classic. Loves me some Kentucky Cooter.

  3. bob2beers
    11:36 pm August 31, 2012 Permalink

    Bring on the Cooter

  4. TC
    11:38 pm August 31, 2012 Permalink

    I went to high school with this guy…he sounds nothing like that. He’s crazy.

  5. Mike
    11:47 pm August 31, 2012 Permalink

    This dude is a pure blooded Redneck and absolutely adds NO value to this site unless you are very, very lonely and severely mentally challenged.

  6. T-Sizzle
    11:53 pm August 31, 2012 Permalink

    Facebooked the dude. Card fan.

  7. Billy Bob
    11:58 pm August 31, 2012 Permalink

    Maybe you just think you went to school with him, all us kin look alike.

  8. big tim
    12:04 am September 1, 2012 Permalink

    look at the rest of his video it mainly louisville video look like hes a uofl fan acting like a ky fan

  9. Another Perspective
    12:06 am September 1, 2012 Permalink

    Matt would hang up on this fake in 2 seconds.

  10. dumb
    12:07 am September 1, 2012 Permalink

  11. dagnabbit
    12:13 am September 1, 2012 Permalink

    those not the^^^

  12. dave
    12:22 am September 1, 2012 Permalink

    some of ky cooter’s “evanpartin” comments on youtube:
    Future Louisville Cardinal, can’t wait to see him in the yum center!
    God I hope this dude is a Card!!
    Would love to see this kid end up in a Cardinal uniform

    why even post it?

  13. duh
    12:47 am September 1, 2012 Permalink

    Why post this? He is a card fan?????

  14. SadCat
    1:08 am September 1, 2012 Permalink

    Is Uk ul on Tv Sunday?

  15. You're Welcome
    1:17 am September 1, 2012 Permalink

    Found the UK calendar I have…posted it on my site I did!

  16. kywildcat
    2:39 am September 1, 2012 Permalink

    Meanwhile… I have ul in a blowout 🙂

  17. tdogg40330
    2:44 am September 1, 2012 Permalink

    14) ESPN

  18. hmm
    3:36 am September 1, 2012 Permalink

    looks like will didn’t do his homework in researching the kentucky cooter

  19. guusje
    3:39 am September 1, 2012 Permalink

    an imposter, making fun of our site. People in ‘da ville’, cooterin’ our cayuts. Dayum shaime.

  20. BPsycho
    5:43 am September 1, 2012 Permalink

    He wore that hat so people wouldn’t make fun of his hair……….

  21. WestWorld
    7:28 am September 1, 2012 Permalink

    Video not post worthy….

  22. smoke and mirrors
    7:50 am September 1, 2012 Permalink

    Speak for yourself Will. I hope Billy G. Suffers for a while in the hospital and then they fire his ass. No forgiving here for what he done to the kids who he was trusted with. It was abuse, plain and simple. For the and others who say the players were wussies, I say, Put your kid in that shit if you want, but don’t put other kids down for not being abused. If anyone thinks what BG did to the players here wasn’t abuse, they are as stupid as he is.

  23. SevenT
    8:25 am September 1, 2012 Permalink

    With a name like “Cooter” who could be surprised with the staged Appalachian rant. But gota love the Wildcat Fan inside.


  24. GrumpyOldDude
    8:33 am September 1, 2012 Permalink

    UNC far from free yet….yesterday’s PR was from UNC, not the NCAA, who still has 3 of 4 investigations going on into that whole mess.

  25. barn
    9:01 am September 1, 2012 Permalink

  26. Smiley Pete
    9:55 am September 1, 2012 Permalink

    You always could have counted down to the game by hours…

    BTW, did anyone else notice Gtech isn’t around Atlanta? Does West Georgia love them or something?

  27. Skip
    9:59 am September 1, 2012 Permalink

    This map made me wonder why Alaska doesn’t have a football program. Bring on the fighting baby seals!

  28. gr8ness
    10:19 am September 1, 2012 Permalink

    Take down this video. Why would believe this guy is a wildcat fan?
    1) he isn’t wearing anything UK.
    2) his hat is a freebee from the local check cashing store
    3) his mother hasn’t used a dust rag on the furniture.
    4) he chose not to upgrade his modular with the curtain package

  29. ThatsExactlyRight
    10:42 am September 1, 2012 Permalink

    Weak (but funny) attempt at making our fan base look bad haha!

  30. Will Totten
    12:19 pm September 1, 2012 Permalink

    28. Whoever said I thought he was a Kentucky fan?

  31. ebell55
    12:30 pm September 1, 2012 Permalink

    I “shut that thang down” after he said he wanted Maxwell to tear his ACL!!!

  32. Evan Partin
    1:19 pm September 1, 2012 Permalink

    That’s my video hahaha can’t believe it made it on here… I am a UofL fan, thought that was kind of obvious & I’m pretty sure the dude who made this post knew I was… It’s not intended to be offensive, just to give a few laughs to both UK & UL fans. Majority of my friends & family are UK fans & I made this one day to post on twitter just messing with them. Never thought it would get 3,000 views haha. Thanks KSR for showin the love

  33. Green River 46
    1:47 pm September 1, 2012 Permalink

    Don’t forget Sunday is Coach Rupp’s B-day. Beat Louisville

  34. WC
    5:43 pm September 2, 2012 Permalink

    he a tennessee fan too