As most who read this blog are aware, I have a slight crush on Ben Roethlisberger. Some of you have questioned my silence on his latest issues and so I thought I’d clear a few things up. Ben is really hot (comment away, but he’s definitely my type) and a pretty good quarterback. Period. That’s it. I never deluded myself into thinking he was the greatest living male on the planet, and the allegations against him, while really terrible if they are true, don’t really affect my life in any meaningful way. Neither are my dreams dashed or my expectations disappointed. He’s still hot and he’s still a good quarterback.
Normally I don’t buy into celebrity rumors. Sure, I’ll watch E from time to time and relish in the latest gossip, but I’ve always taken it with a grain of salt. I don’t watch these players (or go to movies, or listen to music) because of their stellar personal lives. I do it because I enjoy sports, and movies, and music and those who do such things at an elite level are admirable to me. I don’t really care who Taylor Swift is dating, I just sort of like her songs. And even if she dated some terrible troll who lives under a bridge, I’d still listen to her songs because personal lives just don’t matter to me. I think we all have enough drama in our own little worlds, so worrying about other’s little worlds seems frankly idiotic to me.
Same with Tiger Woods. I’ve taken the position from the start that while I’d no doubt freely accept golf tips from Tiger, not once have I wanted marriage advice from him, even before the scandal. I’ve never fought with my husband and thought “Gosh, I bet Tiger would know what to do right now.” I have wondered what my dad or mother or close friend would do-because they’re actually real role models. Beyond that, I simply don’t know enough about Tiger and Elin’s marriage to make an educated judgment about his conduct. Let’s say that they had a rule in place between the two of them when they began their marriage- “You go and screw who you want to, but only as long as it never embarrasses me.” If that was the deal, doesn’t that change your perception of this “scandal”? If you think that is far-fetched, I think you’re wrong. There are plenty of unconventional marriages out there, and to think that celebrities are immune to that is blind.
Make no mistake, there is a place for role models in this world. But let’s let the athletes be sports role models and the dads, moms, grandmas, and grandpas be conduct role models. When I have children, I’d love for them to idolize some of the great athletes of his or her time for their work on the court/field. If they want to play basketball like Jordan, or baseball like Jeter, or even football like Ben, I’ll have no problem with it. But I hope I can make it perfectly clear to them that those guys’ morals aren’t our family’s morals. That marriage and personal conduct questions should be directed to me and dad and not Tiger and Elin.
So if Ben did what they said he did, I hope he does his time and atones for his mistakes, since unlike Tiger, his misconduct is a legal issue instead of just a moral one. And then I hope he plays football and goes on about his business. Everything else is just filler for the 24-hour entertainment gossip train.