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aUKward Fan Photos: Chapter 8

 

aUKward Fan Photos hits the road this week to Lakeland, FL, where I am currently caddying in the first stage of PGA Tour qualifying school. We told a waitress the first night what we were in town for and she said “I didn’t know they had a school for that.” Well, they do. It’s tough and tuition is expensive.

 

Things are busy here in Florida, but the aUKward Fan Photos show MUST GO ON.  While you are enjoying the beginning of the Marcus Lee experience, have a laugh at reader Sean Combs’ expense.

 

Sean writes:

“Hey Aaron,

My name is Sean Combs (Not the rapper P-diddy or puff-daddy or puffy)  and I live in Weare, New Hampshire. My early years I grew up just outside of Cincinnati and I have relatives that live in Lexington.  My grandfather is a diehard UK fan and he instilled that in me. I used to sit with him when I was 7 or 8 and just talk about how awesome Rex Chapman was and listen to the games on the radio (he didn’t like the TV).  In elementary school, I moved to New England.

One time when I flew out to visit, he took me to a UK fan gathering in a church (UK fandom is like a religion) and I met Sandy Bell, Jeff Brassow (Editor’s note: Matt says it’s pronounced BRASSSSSSOOOOOOWWWWW!!!), and one of the coordinators under Hal Mumme. (I think his name was Claude, I don’t quite remember, but he was a very large individual). (Editor’s note: Yes, Claude Bassett. He got UK football placed on probation.)

Anyway this is a picture of me camping in New Jersey on a family vacation.  I was probably 10 or 11 and every Christmas my Grandfather would send UK gear to me in New England, which was the greatest. He now sends it to my kids. I really don’t know what I was thinking with my outfit (I think those shorts were called Jams).

I’m thankful to KSR for keeping me up to speed on all things UK.  Besides Nerlens Noel going to nearby Tilton Academy, the only thing that I ever hear about college basketball in New Hampshire is how great Matt Bonner was at Florida. (Editor’s note: He wasn’t that great.)”

 

For the sake of your computer and keyboard, before you click the “more” tab to proceed to look at this picture I ask that you swallow all food and drink currently in your mouth. You’ve been warned.


 

Sean, my man. I mean, wow.  This picture is so aUKward for so many reasons. Sean is the biggest 10 or 11 year old I’ve ever seen. He’s got to be at least 5’9” in this picture. This outfit makes me wonder at what point in life Sean made his first friend. (Kidding. Sort of.)

 

As far as the picture goes, I’m going a different route than the normal observations. I want to tell you how I think the conversation went down between Sean and his mom before this picture happened:

 

Sean’s Mom: “Hey Sean, go put on the UK shirt your grandfather sent you last Christmas so I can take your picture and send it to him in the mail.  You know, the one with the Wildcat waving the flag while he’s wearing a ninja mask?”

Sean: “Yippy skippy, sure thing Mom. I know the one. What should I wear with it?”

Sean’s Mom: “It doesn’t matter, just hurry up. The lighting is PERFECT out here right now.”

Sean: “Okay, Momsy. Be there in a jiffy.” Thinking to himself: “Can’t really go wrong with a pair of jams, high tops double knotted, and the ole one sock up one sock down look… Yep. This is it.”

Sean’s Mom: “Bring your green hat!”

Sean: “You got it, Mom! Good thinking!”

Sean’s Mom: “Okay, now stand right there in front of the tent and look as slouched as possible.”

Sean: “Not a problem at all. It’s my go-to pose!”

 

If you have aUKward pictures you want the Big Blue Nation to see, please send them to me at [email protected] or @AFlenerKSR on twitter.

 

 

 

Article written by Aaron Flener

John, I was first team All-State. I can put the ball anywhere I want to. I'll make it rain out here.

17 Comments for aUKward Fan Photos: Chapter 8



  1. EEK
    9:40 pm October 17, 2012 Permalink

    This has made my night. I can’t stop laughing when I look at the picture! 🙂



  2. SexnNursinHomes
    9:42 pm October 17, 2012 Permalink

    I work in Lakeland. I feel sorry for you. Don’t light yourself on fire from the depression you receive when their golf courses spray sprinkler pee on you. seriously. Lakeland golf course sprinklers spray pee.

    Watch out for the cigarette smoking 3 yr old asking for handouts (the kid is actually 15).



  3. Lane Goodwin
    9:47 pm October 17, 2012 Permalink

    R.I.P., young fella. You guys should at least do a tribute to him since you talk about him so much on here.



  4. bman
    9:53 pm October 17, 2012 Permalink

    So sad to hear about Lane.



  5. TAXman
    9:54 pm October 17, 2012 Permalink

    Those aren’t jams, jams came down to mid-shin. With that out of the way, I’d like to express my sincere condolences to the Goodwin family, this season is for you little man.



  6. TAXman
    9:55 pm October 17, 2012 Permalink

    3. They will most definitely tribute the little man soon



  7. zacraw2
    10:05 pm October 17, 2012 Permalink

    while your story is entertaining it clearly is wrong. He’s on a camping trip and that is his canoeing outfit.



  8. jerrymerandy
    11:53 pm October 17, 2012 Permalink

    Sean looks like Charlie Talber from the 1995 cult classic film Angus..



  9. jerrymerandy
    11:53 pm October 17, 2012 Permalink

    Talbert*



  10. Fashionista
    12:40 am October 18, 2012 Permalink

    #5, Jams are a brand, not a cut.



  11. TAXman
    6:54 am October 18, 2012 Permalink

    10. I didn’t know that. The only style of Jams i ever saw were the long mid-shin style. Schooled on Jams!



  12. Jammer
    7:59 am October 18, 2012 Permalink

    http://www.ebay.com/sch/i.html?_nkw=jams+shorts

    For purchase of said Jams, lol



  13. atworkredingthisblog
    8:32 am October 18, 2012 Permalink

    I feel for you, I had a sweatshirt just like that as a kid. Had my 6th grade yearbook photo taken with it on. good thing my mother did’nt buy that yearbook.



  14. Jenny
    8:38 am October 18, 2012 Permalink

    After looking at the link to Jams, I’m terrified that those will be the next “retro” item to come back in style. Paired with the big black frame glasses….



  15. jaxcats8503
    8:42 am October 18, 2012 Permalink

    Once again, Aaron brings it hard. Hilarious once again.



  16. gaygaruda
    8:46 am October 18, 2012 Permalink

    P Diddy:

    I live in ManchVegas. We should get together and root on the Cats! I’m heading down to Brooklyn in a few weeks and will say hi to Jay-Z for you!

    mothy



  17. Matt in Franklin
    9:53 am October 18, 2012 Permalink

    I quit reading when the post said that guy met Claude Basset IN A CHURCH…good God, how did that place not burst into flames? Dude, you met the devil of UK football…