A Low-Down, Dirty Sanchez?

“So I walk into a bar, and there’s this girl wearing open-toed Keds…”

Let me get one thing out of the way: It is basketball season in Kentucky. Which means now that the Super Bowl is over, we do not care about the NFL. Also, we do not care about random quarterbacks. I understand that. With that said, how hilarious/kind-sad is this Deadspin article on Mark Sanchez’s ‘relationship’ (he says they are just talking) with a 17 year old girl?

The Terminator’s (touchdown!) quarterback is caught up in what some may call a “scandal”, albeit seemingly legal. As the clock neared midnight and thousands counted down the seconds, Sanchez peered into the probably-illegally-glazed-over eyes of a young girl. Despite warning him that she was merely 17, this fearless femme made sure that Sanchez was well-aware that she was legal in the great state of New York. Romance blossomed, as the ladies’ man himself contacted her, gave her free tickets, and hosted her in his home (also known as, amongst high school girls, as the Jet’s Cockpit). Sanchez showed that he really cared about his new lady friend, texting her at 2 A.M on school nights. Surely he just wanted to make sure she was sleeping and would not be late for Phys. Ed. in the morning. We all know that the wee hours of the morning are when we texts those we love the most, especially when out drinking. Now, said female seems to be simultaneously divulging information to the media and trying to work with the Jet’s administration behind closed doors. Seems pretty counterproductive to me.

Regardless, this is just another chapter in the story of powerful male athletes and their exploits with women. From the college ranks to the Super Bowl, sports fans hear about [insert athlete]’s latest excursions with females. Big Ben will forever be known as a rapist. Kobe Bryant has plenty of haters, with most of the hatred stemming from the unsuccessful and unsubstantiated rape allegations against him years ago. Wilt Chamberlain claimed to have slept with over 20,000 women. Brett Favre sexted a sideline reporter, showing the world what he likes to do when he wears crocs. Why do male athletes always seem to engage in questionable behavior with the opposite sex?

Lots of factors go into this. Maybe the male bravado attitude leads to womanizing tactics. Possibly, these physical specimens are overcome with so many suitors that they are bound to act like an idiot eventually (but never justifiably). The mostly likely reason could be that top-level athletes are celebrities and everyone loves a celebrity sex scandal, whether it bet true or not.

In the minds of Kentucky fans, we need only look back a few years. In 2005, Chuck Hayes found himself at the center of a rape allegation. At first, many of us were left baffled; How could Chuck, one of the most hardworking stand-up guys to ever suit up in the blue and white, do such a thing? As it turned out, he did not. Sometimes greedy people take advantage of the popularity of certain individuals and try to see what they can make happen. Often, with athletes like Chuck and Kobe, rape is alleged and then dropped because these attempts were either nothing or just someone trying to milk all they could out of a consensual encounter.

What Mark Sanchez is going through is not comparable to Chuck Hayes’ case in the specifics, as nothing illegal is purported to have even happened. Yet, Sanchez’s ordeal does involve the sexual endeavors of yet another athlete. This time, social norms and values are called into question because of her age. Maybe Mark was just trying to relive his younger days?

The most important issue, however, is that Sanchez find a way to get John Connor some more touchdowns next year. And stay out of high schools.