We apologize for the language below…it is salty and NSFW, but it is just the way they communicate…you can’t blame us
Today has been a very successful #LouisvilleHateDay, with tons of great reads, photoshops and a video that will stay with us forever. But not everyone likes #LouisvilleHateDay. In fact,many Louisville fans are infuriated by the entire event and have expressed their displeasure to me on Twitter. Oddly, even though most of the posting has been from Drew, the hate has been towards me. And I thought, seeing as how Louisville fans are the most educated, erudite fans in our fair state, we would take a look and see what they think about our efforts today.
— Little Scott Disick (@stevenbaumfalk1) August 30, 2012
We have to give Little Scott some credit here. He is trying to be clever and “turn it back on Kentucky.” See in response to #LouisvilleHateDay, Little Scott racked his brain and came up with “KentuckyHateDay” in response. Get it? It is brilliant! Not quite as successful were his attempts to get #SmacktheSmurfs and #MattJonesisaDouche trending. Neither was retweeted one time. But I do give him an “E” for Effort. Let’s look at another approach:
If I ever saw Matt jones in person I would sock him right in the middle of his f***in face! Fa**ot ass bitch
— Devin Lawrence (@LightsOnDWADE) August 30, 2012
Now “LightsOnDWADE” goes about things in a different way. Rather than simply break down the complexities of a Hate Day, he goes for true primal violence, threatening to smack me in the fact. Notice the homophobic slur (I am sure he meant it in the kindest way possible) and the tough guy attitude. Devin Lawrence wants us to know he is a man’s man and will not take any gruff. I wonder what a tough guy like that really looks like:
Well if there is one thing I have learned over the years, it is never mess with a man who poses for Avatar pictures with a cat. When the Lights are on for DWADE, chances are a pussy will be involved. Let’s look at the next one:
Matt Jones and Drew Franklin need to find a beautiful stretch of highway at sunset….and then proceed to have a head on collision.
— Brian #CardNation (@Bri_Taz) August 30, 2012
Brian certainly seems to love his fellow man. He sets up a picturesque scene, with Drew and I riding down the road in a Kia Rondo, heading to our next UK game as the sun sets on Highway 60. But then, like a Peyton Siva three pointer, Brian veers wildly off course and wishes us death and destruction in a head on collision. I am disappointed Brian…I have had people wish side impact injuries on the KSR crew…but head on? That is just rude.
Matt Jones is a prick.
— Logan Moutardier (@Logan_Mout) August 30, 2012
The words are short and sweet, but the meaning is a bit more complex. Calling me names would just be a normal Card thing to do, so Logan has to go above and beyond the call of duty to get my attention. So he makes his Avatar this picture:
Since the advent of cell phones, the idea of taking a “mirror pic” in the bathroom has become accepted. We all have gotten that late night text that included such a picture and to be honest, in 30 years there will not be one major politician that hasn’t had an “Anthony Weiner” moment dug up from his past. But Logan goes the extra mile here and takes the rare “six guys in one bathroom touching each other while taking a mirror pic.” Who knew young Card Nation was so progressive and confident in their feelings? Kudos to you Logan.
— Willâ„¢ (@BabyHuddo) August 30, 2012
Well hello Baby Huddo. Very nice to make your acquaintance as well. Good to see you spreading the joys of humanity to all you come in contact with (and surprisingly understand the “your”/”you’re” difference). But, I am sad to read that you believe I am not only a waste of a person, but also to the air that I meet. To not even be worthy of the flimsy molecules of air I intake seems a bit harsh. But I am intrigued Baby Huddo as to why you have as your description, “I’m an A1 ni**a, I’m a thick sauce ni**a.” To be fair, I don’t know what it means to be “thick sauce”, but possibly a look at your picture will educate me:
From the looks of this picture, it seems as if being “thick sauce” means that you are white, chubby, with a free NBC hat backward and only wearing t-shirts that are drawn on by markers. In that respect Baby Huddo, you are “thick sauce” and for that, I salute you.
Matt Jones is a douche bag. And not your average douche bag, a really f***ing smart one.
— Jack Rollerâ„¢ (@Simple_Jack7) August 30, 2012
What? A compliment? You have to be kidding me! Simple Jack seems to believe that while I may rub Card fans the wrong way, my intelligence can’t be questioned. That is very nice. Such a jolly chap, I bet his Avatar showcases his happiness:
See look at that. Just two bros chilling, comparing hair gel tips and techniques. Nothing to mock there Jack. Thanks for the compliment. I guess we could end on a good note, but I feel like we at least need to check in with the most infamous Card fan of all.
— spencer shull (@sshull1224) August 30, 2012
Aww Spencer. Perspective has never been your strong suit. Surely the atrocities of 9/11 and the Holocaust are comparable to posts of Abe Lincoln with a line beard and a mock Facebook page, but still should we really say that in public? Spencer we can all be friends. We know you look ridiculous and have set back Louisville fans, shirtless men and upright walking homo sapiens back 100 years. But that doesn’t mean you have to throw around such baseless insults. If you really want to compare me to evil, leave it on the Obama/Howard Stern/Conway Twitty level. Don’t go for genocidal maniacs. Don’t you think that is a bit of stretch?
So there you go…Louisville fans are clearly upset. But what is good to see is that even as we skewer them on #LouisvilleHateDay, they do not cross the line in return. They realize this is all a game and KSR is for entertainment. Thanks guys for being supportive. #L1CYourParoleOfficers