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Heroes Get Remembered, but Legends Never Die

Next year will be something like this, only with fewer unicorns.  Not none, just, you know… fewer.

Sometimes, a player is bigger than his skill level.

There’s no doubt that the newest Wildcat, Nerlens Noel, is a special guy.  We’ve been saying that for months.  Defensively, he’s as good as they come.  Dave Telep, toward the end of ESPN’s worst-planned programming since Ron Burgundy auditioned for SportsCenter, said that he expects Noel to challenge, or break, Anthony Davis’ single-season block record next year.  I don’t know how that’s possible, but it’s an enticing prospect.  Noel, however, is more than just a shot-blocker: he’s an instant hero.

Henri Ducard (ala Batman Begins) said it best: “If you make yourself more than just a man, if you devote yourself to an ideal, you become something else entirely.  A legend.”  Noel’s ideal is simple: win a championship.  He said as much himself last night on air, and on Twitter.  He wants number nine.  And his legend status is almost immediate.  Shaving our logo into your flat top fade to reveal it on national television will tend to do that.  However, that doesn’t mean we can’t “help out” a little bit on that end.

For that reason, I think it’s time we make this kid the next Enes Kanter (only, you know… eligible).  While we don’t know if Nerlens likes professional wrestling, there are certainly some interesting facts out there that we can run with.  I’m gonna throw out some information about this new recruit, and we’ll see what sticks.  Feel free to add to the list, please.  For now, though, we’ll start off easy, with a few of the more obvious tidbits, and get more and more obscure as we go:

 

-He has a flat top hairstyle, and shaved UK in the back of it to announce his college decision.

-He’s got a chance to break AD’s single season block record at UK.

-His parents are from Haiti. It’s time to learn some Croatian for our signs.

-His favorite snack is Cheez-Its.  We have that in common.

-He can palm a medicine ball.

-He only eats waffles for breakfast, because pancakes “are for girls and holidays.”

-He’s actually a genetically modified clone of Keith David, designed solely to woo women and play basketball.

-He can fully digest a turtle shell, just like an alligator.

-His favorite movie is Win a Date With Tad Hamilton, and he watches it twice a week.

-He loves dogs, but he can’t eat a whole one in one sitting.

 

It’s hard to imagine after the season we just had, but we have a lot to look forward to next year.  This guy is just one part of a class that, were it not for last year, would be called one of the greatest of all time.  And it’s not even finished yet.  That’s a sobering thought for other SEC teams.  For now, it seems like we’ve started the offseason with a bang.  I just don’t know how any of us are going to make it until October.

Welcome to the BBN, Mr. Noel.  We’ve been waiting for you.

Article written by Corey Nichols

60 Comments for Heroes Get Remembered, but Legends Never Die



  1. barn
    9:03 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    they speak croatian in haiti? i didn’t know that



  2. Chuck
    9:05 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    He’s actually 5’11 without the flat top.



  3. Azubuike's Bicep
    9:05 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    I thought they spoke French in Haiti.



  4. Jason
    9:05 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    Did you mean creole?



  5. Pat Forde
    9:07 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    UConn and Syracuse run clean programs. I have to find out why he signed with UK. I believe his mother influenced his decision, and that may be a recruiting violation.



  6. Marv
    9:07 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    Croatian? We’ll be lucky is he doesn’t decommit by the end of the day.



  7. henryearl
    9:07 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    it’s Creole not Croatian. dammit Corey quit being such a fuggin BTI



  8. Juan4UK
    9:07 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    Exactly, what does Croatian have to do with Haiti? Blame it on spell check maybe?



  9. Bushleague
    9:08 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    BTI, you are sorely missed.



  10. Kyle Almek
    9:10 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    4 – parlez vous francais?



  11. facepalm
    9:11 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    Croatian? smdh



  12. tltaworl
    9:12 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    I have been critical of Corey in the past, but this was funny. Well done young man. Except for the Croatian part :-). 6. Made me actually LOL.



  13. Catfaninrockytop
    9:12 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    Nerlens once blocked my Grandma’s layup back into her face, and cured her of terminal cancer. He is that good…



  14. The 15 second man
    9:14 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    Thankful that we didn’t land any of these one and does. @4andnoneU



  15. shimsky
    9:14 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    OHMIGOD. This post is RIDICULOUS. Obscure movie, wrestling, Croatian, ….jeez…ur really reachin on this one.



  16. HicksPickSix
    9:14 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    He thinks Corey Nichols makes BTI look like Drew Franklin.



  17. Curious
    9:15 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    There’s better pieces written on Rupps Raftards. Do you have incriminating pics of MJ?



  18. Croatia
    9:17 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    GIVE ME BACK MY LANGUAGE!



  19. ron burgundy
    9:17 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    my audition wasn’t that bad & was wayyyy funnier than this post will ever be.



  20. Rickpitinoshairplug
    9:17 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    One the worst posts in the history of this website. Wow.



  21. UK Homer
    9:18 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    Nerlens, if you’re reading, the posts on this site do not necessarily reflect the opinions or average IQ of BBN. Please forgive this post.



  22. UK Rifle >>>> WVU Rifle
    9:18 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    2 issues for today

    a) are we getting the kid from Uconn?

    b) here is the ESPN top 25 classes so far
    #01 UK – yay, but were you really surprised!
    #07 UNC – cryin his way to another Top 10
    #08 MSU – no problem with Izzo doing well
    #10 IU – if it means UK vs IU outshines UNC vs Dook, I am actually at peace with this
    #11 KU – Rock Chalk, Jayhawk! We will just have to beat you again next season
    #15 SU – your loss is our gain, so hard for me to feel bad for you
    #16 PU – Indiana (the state) produces players, so good for you
    #25 UF – Billy gets on the list (barely)

    Now notice anything yet?

    Wait for it….

    Dook = Not in the Top 25
    15 second Rick = Not in the Top 25

    Maybe we did not get shabazz, but that little nugget has made me smile all morning 🙂



  23. tltaworl
    9:20 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    Poythress: “With Nerlens on board now I think my expectations may be even higher than the fans.”
    -How so Alex?
    FTF (Flat Top Feller): “We’re competitors so of course we want to win it all,” Noel said. “That’s why I came here; I plan to win a national title so I’m good with our fans expecting it. They should. I know I do.”

    goosebumps!



  24. Dustin
    9:21 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    If he loves dogs, why does he try to eat them? Guess those Croatians from Haiti are pretty hardcore.



  25. dacizats
    9:22 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    well looks like first post took care of what i came in here to say



  26. Bluemister
    9:26 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    Corey, I hope you didn’t spend a lot of time coming up with this post. It at least appears you didn’t. You take “ridiculous” to a new level.



  27. PC
    9:26 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    CROATIAN?

    YOU ARE AN IDIOT REDNECK



  28. symphonist
    9:29 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    Just say no, Corey….



  29. gottodoit
    9:29 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    I am a bit concerned.

    When we play Louisville and Siva drives to the basket, it’s possible Noel will swat the ball – and the hand and body attached to it – into the upper deck at the YUM! Center.

    Hopefully, Siva’s carries a fully paid accident and injury insurance policy.



  30. notv
    9:30 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    Croatian? Really?



  31. Turley Curd
    9:31 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    I knew we would get the flat top feller. I still think that picture was real.



  32. Porcino's
    9:35 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    Holy crapballs this sucks.



  33. Dom Papa
    9:37 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    Please construct the Haitian/Croatians reference again. I remember that it was an issue, but not the details. Thanks



  34. OogieBoogieMan
    9:37 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    Hey all y’all critics that’s bangin’ on Corey this morning … bet 99% of you would be scared shitless to put thoughts out there on a daily basis. Not saying you shouldn’t have some fun with the mistakes, but for the vindictive ones: your comments say more about you than they do about the writer. Good day!



  35. PPatt
    9:38 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    In all seriousness that dog comment is out of line.



  36. barn
    9:44 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    maybe they do speak croatian in haiti. i’ve never been there so i don’t know. don’t like dissin’ dogs though



  37. Creole
    9:46 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    I think you’ve created your own legend that will never die: the one about the Croatians from Haiti



  38. Han
    9:47 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    You get points for the Legend image (Tim Curry was great in that), but you lose points for doing an imitation of a crappy BTI post.

    Also, you don’t have the reputation yet for never posting anything true, so this post may confuse people.



  39. Beatle Bum
    9:47 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    I’ll excuse the Croatian mistake, but “flattop feller” is a bad first attempt.



  40. Chris Thomas
    9:48 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    I knew I had read that pancakes line that I love somewhere before.

    It’s great even if it is recycled: http://kentuckysportsradio.com/?p=54557



  41. strange brew
    9:48 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    Noel is the 6″11 “Kid N’ Play”. I’m sure his basketball game is much better, though.



  42. Block'n Is My Hobby
    9:49 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    #18… you made me cry tears of laughter at work. hilarious!!



  43. Steely Dan
    9:49 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    Not sure that I get the Croatia reference. This is very BTI



  44. Fluffballs
    9:50 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    By your logic, Corey, our signs could very well be written in Japanese.



  45. NIch Vegus
    9:51 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    Haiti has 2 official languages. French and Haitian Creole



  46. MyronPryorsLivingRoom
    9:51 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    I love the Keith David reference.



  47. Biglaw Dawgin'
    9:52 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    Will someone please get Corey a photoshop program or at least some sort of clipart subscription? These pictures are ridiculous.



  48. Constipated
    9:55 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    Another gem. At least we have Nerlens. Makes having Corey a little more bearable. Or should I say:

    Dalším skvostem. Alespoň máme Nerlens. Dělá s Corey trochu snesitelnější.



  49. Jared fannin
    9:57 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    This guy is really good lookin, a big improvement from last year 😉



  50. Larry [email protected]
    9:59 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    Word Up



  51. kycatman
    9:59 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    Yeah # 34, I agree with u 100%, lets give this language dispute a rest wish our next BIG MAN all the best.This day and all other days until the season starts should be about them and only them. Welcome aboard Big Fellow!!!!!! Help the BBN bring back #9 and close in on the Bruins titles. Oriaki, hope you can join us for your senior year because there is just nothing quite like hearing My Old Kentucky Home played for your final home game in Rupp. You will love it here simply because we are UK, and there is nothing like BBN!!! GO CATS!!!!!!!! GO CAL!!!!!!!!



  52. me
    10:00 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    Do they just let anyone write on here now? I mean don’t get me wrong, most of us would be bad at this too (not this bad though) but that’s why we don’t write for a job. Is there some kind of pre-req one needs to apply for this or do they just let people of the street start posting things? There is obviously no oversight because I’m sure no one would let this make the cut – I mean this is BTI level. We can do better than this guys…



  53. UKChillfan
    10:02 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    #48 Thanks for that one!!!



  54. Lake Barkley
    10:11 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    COREY NICHOLS = INFINITE FAIL



  55. cracka
    10:56 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    tough to break the blocks record when davis got to play 40 games



  56. Georgi Dieng
    11:12 am April 12, 2012 Permalink

    ffree fwench hens



  57. MustangCat
    12:16 pm April 12, 2012 Permalink

    Well, we got the one want, and the most important one. Shabazz just basically said that winning isn’t the #1 thing with him. He’d rather pad his own stats. That’s ok. Especially out there in UCLA land. Good luck with that. We can win #9 without him easier then we can without Noel. He was the must-get. Shabazz has a dark cloud hanging over his head last i heard, with the NCAA. Don’t know what’s happened on that, but he may not even play at all?! I’d rather get another couple of 5-star kids who can play, and won’t get us in trouble. Things are shaping up quite nicely now. GO CATS!



  58. goofball
    2:58 pm April 12, 2012 Permalink

    african-american-haiatian-croation. me likey. thank you for this.



  59. BigBlue
    11:06 pm April 12, 2012 Permalink

    I wish he would write his posts in croatian